i recently started meditating every day. I find it really relaxing and it has helped me manage my stress. My relationships are a bit better and I have had some self actualizations. Even my issues with bullying have been uprooted a little bit. I am even training harder too. Meditation can change your brain chemistry from constant underlying anxiety to calmness. You are basically resetting the default settings of your mind from overactive to a more calm disposition. This is done in a few ways from what I've learned. Focus and detachment. When you focus on something enough you stop thinking about the things that are bothering you. You can do this by focusing on your breathing. Meditation also gives you the chance observe your emotions from a new perspective. You are not your emotions, you can watch them and this alone takes their power away from them. In this way I have recently been able to face my emotions and forgive the suffering that others have caused me. This has gotten a lot deeper than I meant it to lol. However I just wanted to share some of the benefits of meditation that I've experienced in my short time practicing it.
That's really quite amazing. I've always had an interest in meditation. I'd actually like to learn more.
I've never officially learned how to meditate. I used to lie down, close my eyes and close my mind, try to think of nothing. Obviously I would fall asleep, I asked one of my friends who meditate on regularly to tell them. And he said that it was good that I can actually fall asleep....but try not to. Interesting as I could barely sleep regularly.
I tried breathing and focusing for up to around ten minutes daily, every single day. I kept it for over a month, I think, but it was becoming a bother to think where to squeeze it, so in the end, I was more stressed because of it. Once I accidentaly skipped a day, I never tried again, but I am thinking I should. I did feel good trying to clam down and empty the mind. But when I was in the right mood and wasn't in a hurry for anything, which was the usual case
That's a good place to start. The method that first clicked with me was to first focus on breathing, then observe all sensory input (temperature, wind, background noise etc.) let it wash over you without reacting to it. Then you observe all thoughts going on in your head, you freely allow them to rise and fall (I think of this process as bubbles forming and eventually popping or drifting away), you visualise encapsulating them and putting them to one side. Don't expect to have no thoughts, the aim is to turn the volume down on them so that you are not reacting to them, then short periods of not-thinking will happen naturally (usually followed an instant later by thinking "I did it! I'm not thinking... DOH!" ). Finally, you take your emotions and mood and do the same. For me, the actual sitting down and meditating bit is a practice space. The real benefit comes from being able to apply the techniques you learn there in your everyday life. The ability to observe your thoughts and feelings rather than being your thoughts and feelings, and to recognise and dissipate unhelpful thoughts and feelings before you become consumed by them. I would recommend the book Meditation For Dummies, because it has an overview of a variety of different meditation techniques, so you can explore, modify and combine to find a practice that suits you.
What a great thread! It's about time someone started one on meditation. I have been involved in meditation for a while, initially through my own experimentation, then through Qigong from my kungfu, and further more into it when I started Taijiquan. Aside from all the specific formats of meditation, a large part of it is personal exploration. I spent hours a week outside of class doing it, and after that time I found I was able to reach the empty mind part a lot quicker. I am working on getting back into it, I used to do up to 30 minutes a day, and 1 hour at weekends. The life of a parent means that the time available is reduced, but I still do it regularly. Sitting or standing in a comfortable position, no need for full lotus, laying down is an option, but as @Mushroom noticed, you are much more likely to fall asleep. There is no magic method, just spend 1-5 minutes a day doing it, to get the habit in place. This time can fluctuate depending what you have available. If you have something to do set a timer, so that you know that you will not forget, something less to think about. Be in a place with as little distraction as possible (closing your eyes is recommended to remove visual distraction). Turn your phone on mute! Nothing worse than an notification noise mid way through your session. Breathing slow, and my favorite quote from my kungfu teacher "there are only 2 methods for breathing, in and out". You can count slowly to regulate the time taken for breaths. You can use the wedge method, to focus you mind on something, maybe an object, or the counting. Once you have been doing this for a while let go of that wedge, so that your mind is empty. This is easy to write, but it does take time and practise, you don't expect it to happen instantly, and you may find that in some parts of your life you already practice the "no mind". Many experienced martial artists are used to doing this in sparring. I used to have trouble sleeping, nowadays I tap into my meditation practice and I'll be gone within a minute. It can help with your focus, and observation on yourself. I started getting into it by doing breathing exercises and taichi forms as I could not keep still, moving slowly was my "wedge".
I've heard that term before, "self-actualization", sometimes connected to meditation. Sometimes connected to other things like a very enjoyable activity. I'm afraid I never fully understood that term. I've read about it, but I still don't fully comprehend. How do you reach the state of self actualization? How do you know that you have reached it?
Wish I could give you a good answer. I guess I basically meant is that I learned something about myself.
Yes, I tried focusing on my breathing and then simply trying to empty my mind, I also felt like simply trying to feel my body, sort of, which, rarely, made me feel a bit weightless and distant from myself, which was a pleasant feeling I later tried to find again, but it was hard. Those are some nice tips! I really should try some time and try it all again. I really want to learn to meditate. When I was trying I tried usually sitting cross-legged, also tried full lotus, but after a while in becomes unfomfortable for the ankles and I found half lotus worked quite well! When I was tired and tried to meditate before sleep for a lack of better opporttunity, I tried maybe twice even the lying method, but guess how it ended So that isn't really a way, I suppose. Thank you for the tips also! I shall try
The method I was taught for meditation was to count breaths up to ten, then start again at one. Each breath should be as deep as possible, and each exhalation should last as long as possible. I was told to act like I was trying to break the world's record for longest exhalation. Count each exhale in your head, and make the number last as long as the exhale. When you get to ten, start over again. I was told that this causes you to breathe properly as well as giving you something specific to focus on making meditation much easier for the beginner.
This leads into the difference between "gopher whacking" and "volume control" approaches to meditation. If you enter into a battle of wits with yourself, you will lose; eg. "I will only focus on my breathing and not allow any thoughts to occur". If you include ways of "turning down the volume" of your sensations, thoughts and feelings in your visualisation methods, I think most people will get better results more quickly. Once you get the basics of noticing thoughts without reacting to them, then it is much easier to expand your practice into single-point concentration or whatever else floats your boat. It's funny, this thread has reminded me that I think I was a bit of a natural meditator. I remember being very young and confusing the hell out of my mum when I talked about how thoughts feel before they become thoughts. I also found it very natural to relax my eyes and take everything in peripherally without focusing on anything. I was one of those kids who spent their school days staring out of the window.
A lot of the methods I've read about here sound similar to 'Mindfulness Meditation'. It's something I've researched quite a bit and tried to put into practise. The ability to allow a thought to manifest and then to acknowledge it for what it is and let it pass is Mindfulness. There is a common misconception that you need to 'clear your mind' or 'think of nothing' but is not true. with Mindfulness, if you have thoughts during practise then you ARE doing it correctly. It's how you deal with those thoughts that results in a successful meditation. It takes a lot of practise (as do all things worthwhile) but it can really help in everyday situation. It gives you the ability to take yourself out of situations and hopefully react in a more constructive way or not react at all if it's not needed. I've often thought about Mindfulness and the links similarities to the thought of just 'bottling it all up', one day you might explode. But in practise, it's actually just not expending any unneeded effort. If you feeling like a thought has arisen during practise, you stick a pin in it and expand upon it when you're ready.
I would say that mindfulness is the first step. It's a fine step to stay on if that's all you want out of it too. Once you are competent at that though, then you can go on to more advanced techniques such as prolonged periods of no-mind, mandalas, vision quests or whatever else you are interested in.
This sounds more like an exercise,the keeping track of # of breaths and deliberate prolonging of exhalation, than a meditation.Like a prelim of breath training before learning meditation. Not a bad practice in and of itself. Much of what is called meditation are quite often exercises and /or concentration exercises. Speaking of such,an excellent old tome from the 1930s, albeit from a Buddhistic view is "Concentration and Meditation" by the English Buddhist,Christmas Humphreys. Always enjoyed the irony of his name.
In general my emotional state is almost always a calm neutral, though I am prone to short-lived bursts of intense frustration (perhaps related a bit to my ADHD). Other than frustration, I don't generally get much other emotion on a regular basis. The second strongest, intensity-feeling wise, would probably be anger, though it is rare (maybe 2-3 times a year?) I might feel angry or sad when reading news about something horrible, but the intensity of that emotion is generally pretty low, more 'intellectual' rather than 'experienced' emotion, if that makes sense. I do get annoyed, but I'm not sure if that is the same type of thing. (Generally it is hard to get me more than mildly annoyed...) When I was younger I would get really nervous sometimes. The most vivid memories of this for me were when I played trumpet from age 12-18 or so. When I was 14 or 15 I auditioned for some statewide music thing, where kids from schools across the state are chosen based on auditions where they play a prepared piece they had a few months to practice, as well as sight-reading music you haven't seen before. I remember being so nervous during my audition I couldn't make my lips to the right shape to play. I distinctly recall having this issue a few different times, all with trumpet auditions. Public speaking also tends to get me nervous or flustered, though to a lesser degree now than when I was in my teens & 20s. So anyway I tried meditation for a bit (a few weeks I think). It was very difficult at first to focus and not get bored. After a week or so it was easier. I ended up stopping due to the time commitment--I didn't want to spend 20-60 minutes a day doing that. For me personally I felt the time was better spent on entertaining activities like reading or video gaming... I'm probably wrong about that. I.e., I probably would benefit in some ways from replacing some video gaming with meditation. But I probably won't actually do so.
Just as much of what is called martial arts are quite often exercises or drills rather than actual fighting. Since the method I described was given to me by a practicing Rinzai Zen initiate, I'll accept his definition of meditation rather than trying to put someone else's definitions in place.
There's no rule saying that everyone has to meditate. If you find it boring and not beneficial, and would rather read a book or play a game, then do that! You absolutely can learn to meditate by simply sitting down, shutting up and focusing on your breathing. I just think that is a much longer road than other methods to get started with. Once you get the hang of it, then it can be as simple as sitting down and shutting up. Sitting down and shutting up is beneficial in itself anyway, IMHO.
