I'm sure we all go through it. You've had the passion for the art. You loose the passion. You think about quitting. Some do. Some don't. The ones that don't can get their passion back. Is it possible to help someone rediscover their passion for the martial art they once had but have currently lost? Should I just leave it for them to find on their own? Should I even bother trying to help? Is it any of my business? Is there any thing I can do for them?
To me its the same as with religion, I dont belive in pushing faith on someone, its something they have to approach, feel and decide themselves. I would probably just show that person what's available and maybe they will find something else that suits them. Maybe casually suggest they try a different school/club. I lost the passion for an art I was doing, in hindsight I think it was because it didn't have all that I was looking for, also, sometimes what we look for changes with time. Especially, I think, if you are doing a style that restricts you somehow, for example your self-defense ability (by not training in strikes and kicks) or any other aspect that you are seeking.
Let them go. If they want to return, they will come back. You can not force them into staying as much as they can not force themselves to stay.
I think the main thing you can do is just show your own enthusiasm and interest. It's infectious. If the people around you are fired up and keen, it can have a knock-on effect. As others will no doubt say, you can't force anyone to be passionate about something if they don't feel it. If you try to, and they really aren't feeling it at the moment (they may just need a break), you may end up pushing them further away.
I can relate to losing the passion. I was away for about 10 years and then my daughter got involved in MA. Helping her rekindled the flame inside me. Three years laterI'm going for a second dan in TKD, working towards 1st in HKD and hoping to open a school in the not to distant future.
I think a lot of the trouble is caused by having doubts about an art on the one hand and feeling like you shouldn't quit/should believe your instructor on the other. I stuck at tang sou dao for years despite my doubts as to its effectiveness and my nagging dislike of the teacher's business attitude because I didn't want to be a quitter, especially when I'd quit other arts before. I agree with the previous posters, if someone has lost the passion for an art that's just how they feel. You have to let them know that whatever they do is their decision. I know you're supposed to be committed and everything but if you don't desperately want that 10th dan black belt then you're not going to put up with training that you don't enjoy.
If someone has last that all essential 'zing' for MA, there are a couple of things to try. Take a break from it and go and do something totally different...nothing to do with martial arts. It is a kind of make or break. Either MA will fade into history, or a new desire to train will re-emerge. Or. Try a completely different MA for a while. Or. Go down the pub and mull it over for a few weeks.
People lose interest for a lot of different reasons. I think it's pretty well impossible to generalize this topic. Perhaps the place to start is to find out why your friend's interest has flagged. Is he just tired of being beat up or is there something inherent to the particular art or school? I can say that I was ready to quit martial arts altogether at my old school because the things that I didn't like began to weigh more heavily upon me than those that did. Bogus gradings offset by a bloated belt system for one, and the beginnings of "seminars" that were $20 more, but were offered once every month and we were strongly encouraged to attend. There were other things, but the carnival that was "picture day" did me in. So, I began looking around. I was lucky to find a school and style that has everything I like with none of the things that really bothered me. I am more passionate now than ever. I attend 3 classes/week and hate to ever miss one. I think about it all the time and am constantly reading on the subject or looking for video.
Pub? Weeks? Good idea!. No, listen to what others have said mate. Force someone to do something and what starts as boredom will become hate of the activity. You cant force someone to enjoy martial arts any more than brussel sprouts.
