Fending off a sexual assault

Discussion in 'Women's Self Defence' started by illyria1013, Apr 19, 2004.

  1. AmberJade

    AmberJade New Member

    One who knows

    I was once indecently asaulted by some one at work i knew and thought i could trust. Believe me you go into total shock and this leaves you rooted to the spot and your mind goes completely blank.I consider my self to be a strong and fiesty woman and never thought this could happen to me.

    For a long time i thought the problem was with me and i thought that there was something wrong with me. I know now that the problem lay with him not me and i believe he did this to 'take me down a peg or two' . A lot (not all) men despise strong women.I also believe he had this in his mind for quite some time and he was convinced that there would be no come backs on him. A long story, basically i took it no further as it was his word over mine and i was in no position to put my job on the line ( late eighties, high interest rates)

    I believe from my experience that the best form of defence is common sense and a womans intuition. I am very much on my guard now and i do not trust men in general. aways go with your gut feeling and avoid being alone with men. Keep your wits about you always, trust your inner judgement.Looking back i just think i was in the wrong place at the wrong time, if it was not me it would be some one else.

    I am now happy and settled, living a good life, i do not see myself as a victim, that peice of **** invaded my body but not my inner spirit. I am a better stronger person than he will ever be, and what goes around comes around.

    Hope this helps.
  2. wrydolphin

    wrydolphin Pirates... yaarrrr Supporter

    In my opinion, for what ever it is worth, anytime you survive intact, emotionally being just as important as physically, then you won. These crimes are about power, about dominating you for the rest of your life. By overcoming your experience, you beat him. You have my complete respect.
  3. shotokanwarrior

    shotokanwarrior I am the One

    Getting ready for a tsunami wave of contradictions


    Hedgehogey, you're right. Attacking vital points is effective when you get the chance but it is NOT ENOUGH. He is the One!!!!!!

    I think some of this would work, I am assuming you have already been nuked:

    Repel him with a kick when he lowers himself to the ground. Use a 'Seismic wave' technique - only snap it back halfway so you can deliver another one. If he is standing over you before coming in close use your heel to go for his groin. If he has lowered himself to all fours and attempted to seize your legs, strike at his head with a descending kick.

    Seize his head, shove his jaw backwards then turn his head to the side - either force him to the ground or apply with a swift jerk which may snap his neck. Then swivel on to your side and use a roundhouse kick to go for his face or solar plexus(And here we go-o-oooooo again....).

    If this doesn't work: What way is he holding you down? If by the shoulders, wrap your arm around one of his to lock it. You have him. I don't care what the male egoists say, he can't rape you if he's in a lock. If by the wrists, swivel them to free yourself then lock him, or attack his eyes, larynx, cervical plexus etc. if you'd prefer.

    If all that fails just do what wrydolphin says and heel kick him in the kidneys...I don't think testosterone can drive him so far he can take that.

    Shall I roll around laughing, or object in an outraged manner? I am racked with indecision.
  4. Stuart H

    Stuart H On the Mandarin bandwagon

    If somebody tries to rape you, there's a good chance you will be injured severely or killed. I would think you would fear for your life, and act accordingly. This is potentially a LETHAL FORCE encounter. Dont waste time. Crush his testicles, bite off a chunk of his ear (be careful of possible HIV transmission), drive your fingers into his eyeballs. Doing what they are doing, they forfeit their right to not be seriously injured in retaliation as far as I'm concerned.
  5. shotokanwarrior

    shotokanwarrior I am the One

    Just because crushing his balls or biting his ear are effective IF YOU GET THE CHANCE TO DO IT - doesn't mean that everything else is useless and subtle. Goddamn it, what if you're unable to use the methods you described above - WHERE ARE YOU LEFT?
  6. Mark_Campbell

    Mark_Campbell Valued Member

    back to the very original posts of in the case of an indecent assualt should the victim fight back ?

    in principal i would say absaloutly, i think the emotional damage of knowing that you didnt even struggle would outweigh anything physical damage an attacker could pull off.

    however no one knows how they would react in such a stressful situation, MA or not, male or female, no one can really tell what they would do, we all like to think we would struggle, we all like to think we would win.

    i cannot hold it against any person who doesnot fight back in that situation
  7. wrydolphin

    wrydolphin Pirates... yaarrrr Supporter

    The question "should you fight?" is something that can only be answered acording to each situation encountered. There are so many factors, does the man have a weapon? Do you have young children? Are you isolated somewhere? Where you kidnapped? I don't think that there are any easy answers. The women who survive rape and heal are just as brave as those who right off their attackers.
    This is one of those things where we can armchair quarterback as much as we want, but until we go through a violent assault, we won't know. The only thing that we can hope is that through training, we will have the ability to make the choice to fight or not.
  8. Furikuchan

    Furikuchan New Member

    Here's the only thing about women's self-defense that reeeally ticks me off. Eye gouging, a kick to the balls, these are all nice techniques, but depending on one strike or one technique, however dirty it may be, to take down your opponent for you is STUPID. Learn to really defend yourself...learn how to actually throw a punch, it'll take maybe one week of practice at a karate clss, then you don't have to do anything ever again. Just get a basic understanding of how to fight, instead of thinking, "I'll just kick him in the balls if it comes to that."
  9. XiaoXing

    XiaoXing New Member

    you know..not many women can actually think of that..honestly.
    The girst thing that comes up to their heads when sexually assaulted is ''i have to get this guy off me'',so they resort to anything that will get the assaulter off of them and run.Women that are more disciplined in the martial arts will most likely hit the throat,punch or kick or whut not,becuz they know not to permenatly damage the assaulter...like eye gouging...ouch...
  10. E-Rocker

    E-Rocker Valued Member

    Huh, I tried to post this a minute ago, but something weird happened and it didn't go through.

    Anyway, before I throw my $.02 in, let me make two qualifying statements:

    1. I'm not a woman

    2. I've never been raped

    That said, one (of many) possible defenses is (my fellow males are gonna flinch when they read this): grab genitals, twist, and pull.

    Many good points have already been made in this thread about eye gouging and running away, and having some ground skill.

    One thing that's been overlooked: if you have a person in the guard, they can still punch you, and punching down at a person on the ground works much better than vice verse.

  11. kiaiki

    kiaiki Valued Member

    Opinion, not advice, so don't sue me.
    In the UK we are all bound by 'reasonable' force as the limit on our self defence. You have 2 opportunities:

    Before you are touched it may still be reasonable to claim that you had good reason to expect an assault was imminent. At this point, use of the feet, arms, head etc in striking him - according to his position. A kick between the legs is likely to be easily defended against and expected. Use your nails etc and any other 'weapon of opportunity' you are carrying to help strike him. Shout 'RAPE' (not 'HELP') as loudly as you can, and scream - this may make him run off or at least unnerve him while you 'hit and run'.
    2nd Opprtunity: Once grabbed but not yet overwhelmed - you now have a reasonable expectation of serious injury and may now go for their throat and eyes. IMHO grabbing the testicles is only likely to work (in a panic) if they are exposed. Otherwise, go for the softest 2 organs in the male body and flick the EYES with the back of you fingernails. Dig nails in whatever you can reach. Then struggle, kick etc. Warning: if this does not work he may become even more violent and cause you serious injury as well as rape (AIDS etc aside!)

    Nobody can ever make that decision for you, only equip you as well as possible. Some of our UK police forces don't even recommend self defence classes as they may give false confidence and aggravate an attack unless the classes are very good and techniques are practised regularly in a realistic fashion.
    Last edited: Sep 22, 2004
  12. KickChick

    KickChick Valued Member

    For a true life account submitted by one of our own female MAP members that deals with this issue of not fighting back go to this thread....

    Women's True Life Successful Self Defense Stories
  13. kiaiki

    kiaiki Valued Member

    I forgot (apologies if already covered) - there is now an additional element which may need to be considered: DNA. If attacked, whether or not raped, do not clean off any body fluids or dirt derived from your attacker. Don't shower, clean nails, change clothes etc. until you have seen the police. Chances are his DNA may already be on file or be thrown up some months or years later. You'll nail the b****** eventually and maybe help others to avoid attack in the future. Many assaults fail as the attacker is disturbed etc. Just as many rapes go unreported, so do many 'near misses' - report them and insist DNA is taken, even if it is only from a 'spiked' drinks container (the new rape scourge of the decade).
  14. E-Rocker

    E-Rocker Valued Member

    According to the instrucor I took an SD course from, if you want to attract attention, yell "FIRE!" Everybody likes to watch a fire.

    A friend of mine got raped at a party, unfortunately she took a shower before she went to the police, fortunately she had managed to steal the guy's wallet & therefore had his ID.
  15. shotokanwarrior

    shotokanwarrior I am the One

  16. kiaiki

    kiaiki Valued Member

    Funny thing is - UK police take self defence clases to protect themselves - as if they are somehow different! I know plenty of women out there who would make better use of SD training than some of our increasingly portly law enforcement gentlemen.
  17. wrydolphin

    wrydolphin Pirates... yaarrrr Supporter

    Well, generally, they do tend to be better courses then those which are offered to women. Many women's self defense courses are offered by unqualified or uncaring people. What little that they teach women tends to be useless and the only thing they might gain from it is a hightened sense of awareness.
  18. shotokanwarrior

    shotokanwarrior I am the One

    Goddamned hypocrites.

    I agree that some recommended SD stuff is a bit rubbish, though, the SAS manual by Barry Davies ( I have it now) tells the victim to 'Scratch, bite and kick.' Not much use, especially the kicking part, I conclude he has never done close range fighting.
    Last edited by a moderator: Oct 10, 2004
  19. kiaiki

    kiaiki Valued Member

    wrydolphin - I agree. The police are better trained. I wonder, though, how many of them continue to practice and stay fit enough to deal with a problem.

    shotokanwarrior - It's not so much that they are hypocrites but I wish they would endorse an agreed curriculum of techniques and approved instructors. Sadly, the UK is getting more like the US - if the trainee gets beaten up, they may sue!

    To give any US members a feel for how the UK is going, I used to have to deal with weapons, violent threats, drug dealers etc on a daily basis - as a senior school manager in a rural county. headline in today's local paper: '15 year old threatens to stab pupil'. Came on the premises armed and went looking for another kid. That's mild stuff, but to get to the point of the thread - YES, aikido does work and YES a few simple techniques could one day save some poor sod from an early death in a UK school. I used to brief all our new teacher recruits but was not alowed to train them. Shame!
  20. wrydolphin

    wrydolphin Pirates... yaarrrr Supporter

    I have always thought that it was a shame that they don't do any sort of training to prepare teachers for more violent situations. Fights are inevitable it seems, as hormones and the desire to be "cool" increase during the teen years. Being able to intervine (in a preferably less destructive mannor) would give teachers an edge. I have found my own training to be useful in more situations then I really care to think about since I have started teaching.
    It would also thin out the problem spots that tend to form in areas where there are fewer male teachers or coaches. I have my trophies in my room, that alone is enough to defuse a lot of the problems right around my room when the coaches are out for athletics.
    I don't know that cops who have moved up off the streets still keep in shape. But then, they would be less likely to get into situations where they need to defend themselves, I would think.

Share This Page