Ego, Pride, and Teenagers.

K, this is a long story, so bear with me. Getting to the point right away, a fellow student who goes to me school was punched right in the face by a girl he was supposedly hitting on. Bit of background on the guy, whom I shall to refer to as Boy A (original, right?). The girl shall be, well Haymaker Girl.

Boy A since coming to high school last year has progressively hit on every girl in sight. He will hit on one girl, then completely turn around and go after another girl. Several girls have mentioned that he is harassing them both in real life and through Facebook. Essentially, he is despised by a great number of females, and has acted like this for a great while. He isn't liked.

Now, the situation. Before I continue, I'd like to say that I wasn't there at the actual event, but rather heard details from a witness who was there when it took place.

From what I have heard, Boy A was apparently hitting on Haymaker Girl and her friends, but mostly her, and after a bit, she had enough and just punched him right in the face. End result is his bruised face and a bigger bruised face.

Now, I get to main point of this thread. After I heard the event from the witness, I was able to fine Haymaker Girl, and I asked her questions regarding the incident, out of curiosity.

I asked her what happened, and she said that this <expletive> was hitting on her and she just "smashed" him right in the face. She then proceeded to laugh about it. I gingerly mentioned that Boy A could charge her for assault, ans asked her if punching him was the right choice.

She then started to laugh out loud, claiming that she didn't have anything to worry about. She said that she would just claim self defense, and she would show all the texts she got from him, and say that she would claim harassment. Haymaker Girl then started to laugh again, and referred to herself as queen. Personal opinion here, but she didn't sound afraid, rather proud.

I took my leave after, as I didn't want to stick around.

I then asked some other kids what they thought about it. The responses were interesting.

One girl say that she was happy, and was wondering why no one did it sooner. I asked her if she then said it was okay for Haymaker Girl to use violence like that, even though Haymaker Girl possibly couldn't have been in any danger. The girl was then unsure about where she stood.

Another girl I talked too said while the Boy A was a douche, the punch was excessive, possibly unnecessary.

My thought? I'll be very upfront and honest, when I first heard about it, I was slightly surprised and happy. Absolutely no lying. I don't really like Boy A. I was however also disgusted when Haymaker Girl was laughing and gloating about it, because I thought it was wrong, and I was disappointed to have this person in front of me just dancing around and gloating about how she decked this supposedly harassing guy.

A good majority of people I talked to about the event had the same reaction, like it was something to be proud of. Maybe I'm wrong and the punch was warranted, but honestly speaking, I don't think it was right. I mean, the details are fuzzy, but it didn't sound like Haymaker Girl was really in any trouble.

Admittedly no solid question here, mostly a ramble as it's been on my mind for a bit.

Thoughts?

 

bad stuff could have happened if he punched back, and there's no telling what could happen. could be nothing, could be assault charges (self defense ain't gonna cut it anywhere, that was plain old assault in response to harassment), could be a physical assault in return, or they could end up married in 5 years

the punch was not really warranted, but it was not as excessive as it could have been, and let's face it, i am not fond of school bullies, so i won't criticize.

 

I think the outcome wasn't terrible. No real physical harm done, a punch in the face and a few bruises isn't the end of the world (it sounds far more gentle than an average sparring session). Important for this guy to learn this lesson now, his behaviour in a non-school context could have far worse repercussions. If these were adults I would be a bit shocked at the immaturity of their behaviour, but as they are school-age I am far less concerned.

 

I'm more friends with Boy A than Seventh. He really will not hit back, he is all bark and no bite, he goes like a TKD Black belt

I do agree that the hitting was unnecessary.

 

That's a bit excessive for harassment, but do remember a few dudes in highschool a few years ago who would push people to this point. Pride always seemed to be the main loss in the end, which is often worse than the physical damage. Some people won't take the hint. Some people are bad at giving hints. Some people think it's funny to hit others. I sure as hell would keep my distance from someone like Haymaker girl though.

 

One idiot hit another idiot. Neither probably learnt that their actions were the actions of idiots. Behaviour continues.

 

It's kids like this that give us teens a bad name.

 

Sounds like a mills and boons novel =P

 

That's how I see it; when douchebags collide..

 

She punched him?
Wow, that escalated quickly!

I havent even punched a dude for hitting on my female friend even when he threatened to molest her (in public), we just called an authority figure and explained the situation.

I wouldn't punch someone but I've pinned people for less I guess (although boy a might like it)

 

Depends on the level of harrasment, and whether it was escalated to a higher authority, a teacher or someone. That should be the first course of action. Depends on what he was doing when you say "hitting on", was he just being perverse and talking, was he physically touching?

If touching, punch away, although I do agree with the sentiments where it could have gone very badly if he decided to punch back, but by the sounds of it she was in a safe environment, in school with friends.

If just talking perverse, did she warn him? Make it clear she wants him to go away? Perhaps an open handed good old fashioned slap would have sent a better message, that or a gin and tonic in the face.

Her reaction and her answers being "Queen Bee" and she could get away with it is distasteful, but IMO she was more the victim, her response maybe that one of bravado after an adrenaline rush, surge of endorphins.

If he touched her, punch him. If this wasn't a first occurrence, why wasn't this reported to teachers? If he was verbal, did she warn him? Maybe it should have been a slap to better convey the message. Her reaction does sound disgusting, but before she opened her mouth, she can be seen as quite justified.

I'm also curious as to the boys mental state, what makes him think he can behave this way, why does he behave this way? If as you say he is disliked, maybe it is his way of acting out? Does he realise what people think of him or does he gloat in it?

Does he have environmental issues from the home? Is this how his male figure act? Does he have a male figure? Does he have a reason to despise women based on the female family members in his life?

Once again, if he touched her, punch away. If it was all purely verbal, warn + slap, go to authorities, her reaction was disgusting, but hey it's high school, I can understand where she is coming from, why does the boy act like this? Is he alienated and a loner, does he need help?

 

What happened to Boy B?

 

QUESTION: Would it have been ok for BoyA to Punch little miss queen back in the face in self defence?

 

Personally, i blame MTV and violent cartoons.

 

When I was in middle school (many eons ago) somebody hung up a flier on this girls locker that said I liked her. Girl K we shall call her. I didn't hang the flier or know anything about it. I was walking to my next class completely unaware of the situation and Girl K marched up to me with the flier wadded up in her hand and punched me in the mouth and told me I was yada, yada, yada.

Young people do dumb things... Incidentally when I eventually explained to Girl K that I had no particular feelings for her and that in fact I didn't know anything about the flier. She told me I was still yada, yada, yada.

When I was young I found girls to be kind of intimidating and I wouldn't have dreamed of hitting on them like the boy in your story.

 

He got what he deserved.

 

He sounds like a tedious douche bag, but that doesn't give here the right to hit him. I despised kids like him when I was in school, but that's not the way to solve these kinds of problems. If he had touched her, like CZ said, then he would have deserved it.

The principle or even a teacher should have been told about his behavior, which would have been better for everyone involved.

 

Y'all make me feel so old! When I was in high school, someone like 'boy a' would have been thrashed long before he had the opportunity to develop a reputation as an idiot. Times are different now, and we depend alot more on authority figures to enforce decent behaviour. Personally, I think the fellow deserved more than a simple smack in the face. However, the girl didn't sound like any sort of prize herself. Makes me realize how foolishly we looked at things at that age.

 

You're right, but the world is different and thrashing someone now carries more severe consequences than back in the good ol' days. My coach in high school told me that a few decades ago when a couple of guys had a problem with one another at school, then they would head out to the field and have a boxing match during P.E. I wish we had these things stills.