Here is another article from Silvio Morelli which I think high ranking students, and instructors alike will find interesting. A Matter of Respect Like any strong relationship, the bond between a martial arts instructor and student hinges on two elements: respect and loyalty. When these values are compromised, the relationship, one of the most valuable elements in the personal growth of both student and teacher, can sometimes be irreparably damaged. As they train together over the years, the instructor and long term student will inevitably get to know each other well. The instructor may even allow the two to become involved in each others personal lives and spend time together outside the dojo as friends, albeit still bound by the obligations that govern the instructor-student relationship. The dynamics of this bond is much like a healthy relationship between a parent and their adult child, whereby the child, once matured, becomes an adult on equal footing with his parents, but still maintains a sense of duty, respect and appreciation for those who reared him. In essence, he recognizes that they gave him the ability to stand on his own. In return for their loyalty and hard training, dedicated students may also be given certain allowances. Despite the fact that they will be increasingly expected to be the example other students should follow, they may even be forgiven some transgressions beyond what may be tolerated from a beginner or novice student, as parents do for their children and friends do for one another when one makes a mistake. The relationship between instructor and student can thus become one of equals, in the sense that they treat one another with mutual respect and courtesy, but like children and their parents, what has been given must never be forgotten. Regardless of an instructor’s generosity or his disinclination to demand subservience with an iron fist, this should not change his students’ view that their instructor deserves their loyalty and respect. An instructor should not be made to constantly reinforce this position to his students. Enforcing such behavioral codes from above can easily be mistaken as ego driven, but in reality certain rules must be followed and certain hierarchies must be maintained to set examples for the students, and to reward and measure development from beginner right through to branch instructor. It is a matter of respect that students adhere to the guidelines. These ideals are more easily undermined, however, in these times we refer to the martial arts as an industry and students as customers. Students may sometimes see their training arrangement as a simple exchange of money for a commodity (the instructors’ knowledge) and to be fair, in their search for more “customers”, many instructors may present it as this and slacken the demand for the traditional value system in order to cater to the modern mindset and lure more students. However, there have always been full-time instructors paid for their teaching, and it has always been expected that a student give a fair remuneration for his lesson, be it money or in kind. However, no matter the type of arrangement, it was never allowed to affect the student-teacher relationship. And no matter the type of school, be it a dojo or a university, there should be a respect shown to the teacher, this underpins every type of learning. Students may pay, but it is commonly accepted that what they gain far outweighs what they give. The martial arts teacher-student relationship has always been considered somewhat sacred in that what is passed on is much more than a knowledge of the art itself. The instructor provides guidance and a vehicle (the art) for growth on a personal and spiritual level, instilling life skills, confidence and building students’ character. As these qualities build over the years the instructor-student relationship will face its toughest test. While it is easier for students to remain humble and respectful when they know their abilities pale next to their teacher’s, the long-term student will grow to know his teacher more as a human being and less as a master figure, and will see his own abilities get ever nearer to those of his teacher. The temptation for the student to let go his ego and desires overtake his commitment to the promise or respect, loyalty and consideration will therefore become greater as his abilities and position within the school give him more opportunity and power to do so. It is at his stage in the development of the student-come-instructor, when he may feel less of a need for his instructor’s guidance and be consolidating his own technical style and teaching method within the art, that his true colors will show in the course that he takes. Will he act in a way that recognizes his instructors enormous role in helping him reach the level he has, and repay his instructor’s dedication, or will he forgo his duties and obligation to further his own interests? While the instructor always endeavours to develop in his students the traits of confidence, self-belief and independence in equal measure to humility, loyalty and respect, the right balance is not always struck. In the end, the instructor can only do so much. The instructor puts a great deal of faith, love and trust in his long term students, particularly those he chooses to become teachers of the art that has played a significant role in defining his own life, philosophies and behavior. Faith and trust undermined can cause the deepest of injuries to a person and for an instructor whose student betrays him for reasons of personal gain or vice, whether it be money, power or otherwise, it is the greatest injury and insult of all. It is such heartbreaking that cause some instructors to withhold knowledge or keep students at a distance, to be the detriment of the learning experience of both parties. When a student betrays you, one who you have watched and helped grow from a raw beginner into an instructor of commendable skill and enviable position, it is not only deeply hurtful, it also tears at the very fabric of the philosophy that underpins the cycle of teaching and learning martial arts. After all, would any instructor teach if he thought that those students who reached a high level would turn their backs on him? Even when a student goes off in his own direction, perhaps leaving the school or style to join another or establish his own, as sometimes happens in the martial arts, this need not amount to betrayal, but it must be done with respect, honesty and integrity. Loyalty is about being available to assist those who have given to you, and respect entails giving them credit where it is due and treating them with honor, courtesy and due regard. In both our words and actions, it is vital we pay homage to our instructors and the important role they have had. Without my instructor, I wouldn’t be where I am now, and to this day I make this plain to him and to others.
Very good article badger.... thanks for sharing that! This is a good one to print out and hand over to our instructors !
Good article, I still don't like Silvio Morelli though, some of my close mates have had dealings with him, and they all came away with a very creepy feeling...
As an instructor I agree with what is said. I have watched some of my students that started at 8, 9, or 10 grow up and go off to collage. I have had some that have grown up and married had kids and bring their kids to me to start their Martial Arts journey. I have never been in it for the money. I have always worked a full time job and taught. This is not to say that there is anything wrong with teaching full time if you can do it with out compromising you values.
Loved it... and it exemplifies everything I think MA should stand for. To hell with the McDojoism of today... I'm certainly printing a copy ...
