Most suitable - advice please

Discussion in 'Women's Self Defence' started by Falcore, Oct 24, 2005.

  1. Falcore

    Falcore almost acceptable

    Howdy, I need some advice from some world weary people who know stuff about stuff.
    My girlfriend is mere moments away from embarking on a backpacking trip, taking in the UK, France, Spain, Greece, Morocco, Egypt, and possibly Turkey and Switzerland.
    She's pretty soft, did some Moon Lee TKD back in the day, but she's just so small... I worry about her.
    So, I need to get her some form of self defencey-type device.
    Any advice? I will need to consider it's functionality, but it has to be legal in the countries she's travelling through. Just taking a guess, I am thinking that almost NOTHING will be legal in all those nations, so the only thing I have in mind is a rape alarm.
    Ideas? I've heard mouth spray mentioned - how effective is this?

    Don't tell me to use the search function.
     
    Last edited: Oct 24, 2005
  2. Wax

    Wax Valued Member

    Brake fluid in a pump deoderant bottle, like pepper spray. Dunno if this will get through customs though.

    You might want to do a search of the forum and see if this has come up before.
     
  3. Crimson_Stone

    Crimson_Stone Stay Puft

    Break Cleaner burned the heck out of my arm the other day, can only imagine what it would do to face and eyes. Carburetor/Choke cleaner is another chemical you don't want sprayed in your face. Wow the auto-parts store is a dangerous place.

    If you want something half plausible to carry on a camping trip, try something like Raid's wasp killer insecticide. Its essentially a neuro-toxin, and shoots up to about 20 feet. Can't imagine it feeling to good in the eyeballs either.

    ohhh yeah they are all flamable too. All is fair in love and war.
     
  4. Topher

    Topher allo!

    What about those alarms where you pull the cord and they go off.

    Other than that i guess spray deodorant and a metal pen - both legal. Might not seem like much, but spray in the eyes and stab the leg/face is gonna hurt.
     
  5. Pyro

    Pyro New Member

    I got some army grade truck degreaser that melts skin. Some chemical spray that you could pass off as a deoderant or some beauty product would be perfect. Chop sticks for putting up your hair or a metal pen as was mentioned would both serve as good stabbing weapons. Could also get a keychain Kubotan.

    http://www.gungfu.com/cart-htm/weapons_japanese_weapons_kubotan.htm

    There are probably better places to buy them, just showing what they are.

    Or just hold your keys in your fist, or use this!!

    http://www.personalarms.com/weapons_1.htm

    Lots of choices you could use and pass through customs if you are a clever about it.
     
    Last edited: Oct 26, 2005
  6. KickChick

    KickChick Valued Member

    Best advice?

    Buddy up with another person. Make sure she isn't alone at anytime.... specially in foreign countries where she is not familiar to her surroundings and its people.

    Tell her to stay aware and not venture off with anyone other than her group.

    Taking a self defense item/weapon with her may not be advisable considering the laws of each country. Would be nice if she knew some basic self defense techniques but as you say she is moments away from departing.

    Have her buy a giant whistle to keep around her neck.... if she should find herself in a situation a whistle blow is understandable in any foreign language and will call attention to the situation should she find herself in one.
     
  7. Falcore

    Falcore almost acceptable

    Thanks team.

    Have purchased a personal alarm for her.

    It's a bit late for her to take SD course, and she has no interest in them anyway.
    Having someone with her would be sweet, but I can't take 4 months off work, and I don't have $13000 spare dollars to travel like she does...
    The metal pen sounds good, might get one too. I don't want her carrying anything elaborate or obvious, as she will be criss-crossing through customs the whole time, and I have a feeling she wouldn't be too keen on spraying industrial brake fluid into someones eyes.
    Thanks again.
     
  8. tellner

    tellner Valued Member

    One of the best I've ever heard of was a sock-puppet and a blowtorch.
     
  9. Rebel Wado

    Rebel Wado Valued Member

    The idea of traveling with a group or buddy is a good one I also recommend.

    As for anything else, it is up to her. Sure you can suggest things such as how to get self-defense training pertaining to backpacking through Europe and/or contacting those that have actually done this before to give her a better idea of the risks and what to expect. You can provide her with a means to get the expert opinion and training that can help her. However, ultimately you have to let go and allow her to make her own educated decisions.

    She needs to come up with ways to stay safe on her own. Buying her items she did not ask you to get her or providing body guards for her is not helping, it is what some call enabling. Enabling is basically defined as doing something for someone that they should be capable of doing themselves. Enabling is generally not a good thing because it allows people to go about taking risks and such without suffering the consequences of their actions. If she is capable of taking a backpacking trip through Europe, she has to be willing and able to provide for her own safety or suffer the consequences. Personal safety is serious and she has to be serious about her own safety, it has to be her decision. You providing her with safety only gives her an excuse not to do that for herself. How do you think she can become a warrior or just be able to protect herself if you can't detach and let go, allowing her to do this for herself?

    Another thing about enabling is that by providing her with safety, you are actually ultimately trying to control her. She will be gone and out of your immediate vacinity, so this might make you feel a little bit powerless and you may be trying to control her by insisting on her doing certain things your way. Then again, you might just be thinking about her best interests, I don't know... just be honest about it to her and yourself... are you just interested in her safety or is part of it to gain some control over her and the situation.

    On the other hand, helping someone is defined as doing something for them that they are not able to do for themselves. There is nothing wrong with providing help to someone that needs and wants it.

    I suggest that maybe she can best be helped by making it clear that her personal safety is her responsibility and if she doesn't take it seriously and plan for it, she will suffer the consequences of her own actions. However, also make it clear how you care for her and are concerned for her safety. And also that you are there to help her with anything she wants or needs, all she has to do is ask.

    Just some thoughts, obviously I don't know enough about your relationship and situation to really know squat, but I did want to provide you with some information that may help you.
     
    Last edited: Oct 26, 2005
  10. Falcore

    Falcore almost acceptable

    I'm sure that you posted that with the best intentions, but from my point of veiw it comes off as very pretentious and presumptous. I simply asked a question regarding legal, simple self defence options for a women. I've settled on a few. Thanks for the help.
     
  11. TheCount

    TheCount Happiness is a mindset

    I would personally say Krav Maga or Defendo becase they emphasize awareness which I know in france you need a load. Dude from my church was in france and got mugged by someone because he didn't have the training to know they were there. Also both the arts can handle people bigger than you.

    Also if she gets into the habit of keeping her deoderant can in her pocket if she is attacked thats a legal self defence tactic to spray them in the eyes.

    But just if your REALLY worried, in france (not endorsing illegal stuff in britain mods), in france you can have a knuckle duster or CS Gas/Gel if you are over 18 and you may purchase it rather cheaply, about £7 euro for a little 150ml can of CS. Don't know about Spain and Morocco but the UK is really strict on this, so is Greece I believe and I have a suspition Egypt is to an extent as well.
     
  12. TheCount

    TheCount Happiness is a mindset

    And yeh id like to add, its not like you are in danger of being mugged all the time, its rare and often the worse that happens is you loose your wallet. What you do is you put the notes of your money in say your chest pocet where they cant be seen (presuming you left your backpack at a hotel) and then put your major card that you could effectively live off in another hidden place. This way if you get mugged, they steal your handbag and you still have money etc. You leave a little in the wallet for it to be convincing so they chore what, €30 ? And you have a couple of travellers cheques in your backpack, a credit card and money...

    If in doubt though walking poles can hurt
     
  13. Pericles

    Pericles Valued Member

  14. Rebel Wado

    Rebel Wado Valued Member

    Sorry about that.

    I keyed into a post that entertained the idea that if you had the time and money you would either hire someone or go yourself to be her bodyguard (whether she wanted that or not?). Questions came to mind about that... So anyway, sorry about that.


    You know, I once gave a knife to a girl as a present. She later ended up using that knife to fend off two attackers and possible rapists who were apprehended later by the police. The knife would have done nothing for her if it was in her purse or pocket. The fact she identified one of the assailants as following her before the second one jumped her from surprise, gave her the time to palm the knife so it was ready when she got jumped.

    She was lucky.

    Giving your girlfriend something like the alarm you did could be a very good thing.
     
  15. TheCount

    TheCount Happiness is a mindset

    Bodyguard spray is pointless. Its icky smelling water and does nothing for you.
     
  16. bcullen

    bcullen They are all perfect.

    I had an accident involving that stuff and an oscillating fan I few years back. Wasn't paying attention and had some blow back in my face. One of the scariest momments of my life. It literally paralyzed my lungs on contact, couldn't inhale, couldn't exhale. Lasted for about 20 seconds with a dose about equal to an atomized squirt of perfume or cologne. Not something I'd care to repeat.
     
  17. Ghost Frog

    Ghost Frog New Member

    Take Kick Chick's advice. A whistle is an excellent idea. They really knock out some noise, are easy to carry, and don't contain pressurised gases that can get you into troble with airlines.

    Staying safe when travelling is more about attitude than what you're carrying in your bag. She needs to be in a confident and aware state of mind while she's walking around. People who pick on women look for an easy target- someone who's nervous and not aware of their surroundings.

    Try to build her up before she goes, but don't worry too much. I travelled as a lone female around France, Spain and Greece when I was a teenager and came to no harm, although I was nervous on a couple of occasions. The important thing is that she trusts her instincts and isn't afraid to say "no" or to walk away from someone if she feels uncomfortable. Don't worry about appearing impolite.

    Also bear in mind that in most people in Europe are still old-fashioned, friendly types (especially outside big cities) and people are very prepared to help a lone female, so she shouldn't hesitate to ask for help if she thinks she's in trouble. I ended up meeting other travellers in hostels anyway, so I wasn't on my own all the time.
     
  18. aml01_ph

    aml01_ph Urrgggh...

    I'd like to add some to Kickchick's advice:

    1. Use her brain. Avoid places that will get somebody in trouble. Be aware of her surroundings...stuff like that.

    2. Put alcohol in a spray. It is legal, cheap, not likely to kill anybody(but it will hurt on eyes) and easily explainable (you gotta groom yourself after all). I like the 70% solutions best.
     
  19. TheCount

    TheCount Happiness is a mindset

    Loudest whistle in the world costs £4.99, iu think you ca suffer the cost
     

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