I'm 5'5" and about 160 pounds. I work out and have never really felt bad about my height before but after taking martial arts classes I do feel kind of inadequate. I go to a studio where they teach self defense and martial arts. They teach a mixture of techniques. American Kempo, counter point, bjj, and others. My instructor is only like an inch taller than me and he showed me how fast he could move and I genuinely was amazed. I aspire to one day be close to that but yesterday day I practiced some striking with a wayyyyyy taller and heavier dude. Like 6'5 230 maybe. I feel like I would never be able to compete with that in a real life situation (no weight classes in real life). It's been making me feel so weak. Like no matter how hard I try I won't be able to compete with guys like that.
You might not want to hear this. But that's normal. It's like getting into a car for the first time and expecting to be a F1 / NASCAR driver level. Hard work, bit of dedication and time. I'm 5'11 and around 92kg. I've trained against 64kg Amatuer Boxing Champs and got my chin tested, rolled with 70kg purple belts and surprisingly lasted 20 seconds. My gym buddy is 30% lighter than me and about 30% stronger than me. All because they have trained longer and harder than I have. So give yourself a bit of time.
what mushroom said. i'm 5'0" and weighted 116lbs before i started lifting weights (around 125 now). it sucks at first, then you get better and can compensate for it better. being extremely evil also helps. you don't "win" by being big or strong or fast or whatever, you win by doing your stuff to the other guy before he does his stuff to you, it's just that size, reach, weight and other such advantages make it easier to do so (oftentimes massively so), but they do not necessarily guarantee it. also realize that class environments and the situations in which you might conceivably find yourself needing to defend yourself are two different things, with different factors which influence how the situation plays out. there are others here far more qualified than me to talk about that, so i'll defer to them if they decide to chime in.
You have to accept that you may not be the very strongest, very fastest, very- whatever- person and ask yourself "do I still have something to gain and enjoy by studying MA's?" Base your assessments on yourself, not those around you. "Am I better than I was 6 months ago? A year ago? 5 Years ago?" I am 50, I am not the strongest, the youngest, and certainly not the fastest, but I am better than I used to be - every single year I improve. And I do surprise people who look at me and underestimate me. I can hold my own with some people half my age and far stronger. And against some others, well, they are better than me and I can't. A 6 ft 5 person is always going to have that as an advantage. That is just reality. A person that big who attacks you has an edge with his size. You can give yourself other advantages by developing skills, but he still will always have that advantage. It is one factor, not the only factor though. Ask yourself this - what are the chances that an attacker will be 6ft 5? I am not fast, I am sure I am one of the slower people in class. I am currently trying to make up for it by getting better with my footwork and timing to counter the many many faster people in class. I can't match their speed, so I am also trying to develop a counter striking strategy. I watched my sister's BJJ class once. That class was full of very large men. All much bigger and stronger than her. Don't know what the deal was, she is 5'9'. But I noticed she was faster than most of them. Ask your instructor for what to develop against bigger stronger opponents. Just accept that some people will have advantages and use it as a learning opportunity to figure out how to handle that. And figure out what your advantages are that you can further develop!
My old BJJ coach is 6'1" and 95kg and very athletic. He's a killer on the mat, an elite purple belt. His coach is Robson Moura, 5'5" and 66kg. Robson Moura absolutely destroyed my coach and tapped him repeatedly. I could post any number of links of smaller people smashing bigger people. It's not easy, but it's achievable to an extent. Obviously if the larger people have the same skill level as you, you will always struggle. Where you have developed a high level of skill and are up against an opponent with significantly less skill you will usually have an advantage. Nothing is a guarantee though. I would also echo what aaradia said... Your attacker is unlikely to be 6'5". Ask yourself this, in a real life situation, would someone that size and weight be able to run quickly? I'm serious. Flight skills are totally undervalued by martial arts students as a means of self defence. Someone that big running might gas quickly, or might struggle to climb over a big gate or down some stairs etc.... All if's and buts I know but I guarantee you there are things you can do that they would struggle with. I would echo what others have said and also say you should train if you enjoy training. If you don't enjoy training, you won't develop the skill you aspire to have.
My height and weight is almost identical to yours, so I know where you're coming from. I agree with what others said. I also have a friend who claims to weight perhaps 60 kg. He used to do Jiu Jitsu and I saw him tap out people of 90 kg, who weren't too skilled or didn't have much or any training in ground fighting. Sure, big people have advantage when it comes to a fight. But you can increase your chances precisely by practising a martial art or learning how to run, for example It's only my theory, but chances are, if you are attacked on the street, it probably won't be by another martial artist... So if you know what to do and do it faster than them...
You know what makes you feel inadequate. Meet the challenge until you're no longer inadequate. Then find that feeling again somewhere else. That means there's still meat on the bone. There's still more to do. It's a good thing. When you don't see a weakness anywhere then you have a problem. You always have something that deserves improvement. If you can't find it, you can't fix it.
It can work both ways. I used to train Thai with a guy that literally looked like Superman. 6'4"+, shoulders for days, V shaped torso, very muscular, etc. And yet...on the pads he couldn't bring hardly any of that to bear. Couldn't coordinate those gifts together to create power. I'm 5'10" (and a half!) and at the time was a soft 90kg (give or take) and yet could get as much of that into a kick as I could.
Confidence comes from competence. Work hard and then realize there's always more to do. Also this thread may help you see how even people here who are really good aren't truly satisfied with their skill level, and probably never will be. http://www.martialartsplanet.com/forums/showthread.php?t=125544
It is overwhelmingly likely you will never be particularly good. Train because you enjoy the process, not because you have your eyes on some distant goal.
On first glance, this sounds really pessimistic. But there's a metric crapload of wisdom in it. Whether your goal is to "master" a martial art or survive a street altercation, there's a decent chance that it won't happen. And won't need to. Best case scenario, it's a far off, abstract, and fuzzy notion. So, while it's good to have long-term goals, it's at least as important to love the process. Everyone loves being good at things. But if you don't love being mediocre at them as well, you're probably doing the wrong things.
Nice - reminds me of this - [ame="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5jADnNpx3R4"]The Wisdom of Pessimism - YouTube[/ame]
Mmmm this tells me that a) you were confident with your body before, that despite your height you were physically fit and felt equal to other men. Now you have started martial arts, you are amazed at your coaches speed (despite being one inch taller than you, and you struggled against someone who has a reach advantage. I dont know how long you have been training but: A) more experienced people are going to use their technical expertise to counteract sheer physicality, tall or short. B) Small people use their own advantages to maximise their techniques. If you were equal in technical ability to that 6'5 guy you may have done things like staying on his chest to make yourself a bit smaller, or use your lower centre of balance to co-ordinate your footwork (no matter how fast he is if your footwork is equal to his you will be able to change direction faster - its physics), stay within a punching range where you get maximum extention, while he can't generate full power etc etc... But until you give yourself enough time to sharpen your skills these strategies won't become obivious to you C) The big difference is that a taller person doesn't have to work for his natural advantages to manifest themselves that much. He knows he can outreach you from the first day. He also sees more angles and opportunities from day one. As you improve technically though the advantages of being small begin to show. But ONLY if you work on refining your technique. D) Because you are smaller you are going to have to work harder to get into (and out) your optimum range. This is crucial. On your worst day your footwork has to be better than average. There is no getting round this. I've learnt this the hard way in fencing and boxing. F) Believe it or not only medium sized people underestimate smaller opponents. Taller people with some experience know exactly how it feels to be cramped out. They develop anti "short b&st@rd!!!"techniques too through experience. G) Watch Roberto Duran vs Sugar Ray Leonard 1 for inspiration on how to drag an taller opponent in the trenches. H) I'm 5'6". Your worst as to be better than their best.
OK, first of all you are better than anyone who hasn't trained. Secondly, there are people who can mop the floor with people you might idolize. That's just life. However, with diligent practice you can become at least reasonably proficient, which is far ahead of the pack. For example, I have next to no musical talent. However, I am a compulsive practicer. If I figured I had to practice 8 hours that day, that's what I'd do. Every note was a struggle. Because of that, I was able to make my living as a musician, where people with more talent but less work ethic were unable to do so. Perfectionism has its benefits. As long as you have no excessive disabilities, you can become more than you thought you could be. It really comes down to asinine amounts of repetition. Remember that you don't practice until you get something right, you practice until you can't get it wrong. Those are two very different things.
I hear this about every 3rd or 4th Muay Thai class I go to! It's like the un-official motto or something there. I still think it is a pretty significant piece of wisdom.
Last night I almost got my neck broken by a huge guy who just smashes everyone I see him train with. He has been training for a while and looks like a bicep on legs. I spent 5mins under his mount trying to hide my head under his barrel chest, eating punches and trying to breathe. By far the toughest spar of the night. Life sucks. Get a helmet. Some people are just better than you and have greater physical gifts. More training decreases the gap. I know people that can tie me in knots that have zero natural athleticism. Keep training and you will move forward. Always be raising your own standards by the measure of your own performance not by comparison to others and one day not too far in the future you'll find you are actually pretty damn tough.
Imo if you want to get to a decent level in your art and you enjoy it,immerse yourself in it for a while. Just eat,sleep and train. Then go back to maintenance and you should see a big difference.
