Hitting a women in self defence?

Discussion in 'Self Defence' started by Yukimushu, Jan 30, 2004.

  1. snailfist

    snailfist Valued Member

    Ladyhawk- what you say is very true; save that you are a trained MAist, know better techniques than a good hard slap, and have better restraint at only exercising them in self defense.

    Having seen angry women before, (not directed at me btw :love: ) 9 out of 10 times any agressive action will be a slap to the face (or perhaps a swift kneecap :eek: if she is too close for that).

    However there is that tenth occasion when the attack
    will be more serious- either a punch rather than a slap (don't laugh- i know a girl who has concussed a lad in one) in a social situation, or perhaps eg clawing at the eyes in an assault with serious intent.

    I personally have a severe compulsion about hitting girls. My stance personally, is to take a slap, block a punch, and use a lock for anything more serious than that. Oh, and stand side on

    What action you take does of course depend on the situation, and on your MA- a boxer might have a hard time applying a wrist lock, but an aikido practitioner should be able to restrain her harmlessly without too much difficulty.
  2. ladyhawk

    ladyhawk Valued Member


    True, the average female's defense would probably be a face slap or attempted groin strike because they were conditioned over the years into thinking these are the ultimate techniques for stopping an attack.

    I agree that the level of force used to control
    and stop an attack depends upon the situation at hand. Each individual encounter is a judgement call.

    Gone are the days when women were considered the passive gender so never underestimate anyone when your gut instinct has triggered a warning.

    Over the years men were taught not to hit a lady
    but if a lady isn't going to behave like a lady and attacks a man then the man has the right to defend himself however his conscience deems appropriate.
  3. freespirit

    freespirit spirit of the free

    i agree that gender should not matter in situations like these, i would like to think that i would actually not be biased but i still would not hit a lady, as i say i agree that gender shoudln't matter but its natural for me to try not to hit women.
  4. WingChun Lawyer

    WingChun Lawyer Modesty forbids more.

    Hm, I once saw two girls fight swinging metal chairs at each other in avery unladylike manner. In situations such as these, I would prefer to (a) stay away, or (b) punch the hell out of both ******s.

    Same as with guys, really.
  5. amiller127

    amiller127 Chief Instructor

    Was listening to the Comedian Chris Rock talking about this the other day. Here is what he says.

    "People say there is NEVER a reason to hit a girl. Theres a reason to hit anybody. Theres a reason to push an old man down a flight of stairs just dont do it!"

    "And women you know that you can go too far sometimes. Im a man and if im getting into an argument with a guy bigger than me i know there is a line I dont cross! Women dont seem to know this"

    "There is nothing more likely to give you grief and embaress you in a resteraunt as a girl who knows you aint going to hit her. Now dont get me wrong, i dont think its right to hit a women, BUT ill shake the S**t out of one"

    Personaly, ive been attacked by an ex girlfriend when she was drunk on a few occasions. And she was in the same art as me and quite senior too. Was one occasion in the middle of Neath town were she all of a sudden decided that she was hungry and felt it would be good to try to eat my arm Left me with her teeth impression on my arm for over a month.

    She tried the exact same thing a few years later when she was drunk and had tried hitting me and I had to restrain her. She got her teeth into my arm and the only thing i could do to stop her was to pull my arm in tight to her mouth. She ended up with a cut lip because of it and now tells people i tried to beat her up!! Even though she punched me, kicked me and bit me, according to her I was the one that beat HER up. Im 6 ft, 12 stone and have been training for years. She was 5 4 and about 8 stone. Anyone here think that if i had tried to beat her up she would have been hurt more than a cut lip when I had to ger her to stop biting me.

    So my opinion is this. If a girl is trying to cause you physicall harm and you can get away, then you get away. If you cant escape go try and restrain her if possible. If that isnt going to work and she is intent on causing you pain then hitting back is to be used as a last resort. Girls shouldnt have a get out of jail free card if their insistant on trying to kick the hell out of you. You have the same right to live your life free from harm and to defend yourself whether your attacked by a man or women.

    But if your a guy who beats women up for no valid reason, just because they annoyed you. You deserve the biggest ass whooping in the world.
  6. Nordic_Blood

    Nordic_Blood New Member

    It doesnt matter what you may be labled, nor does it matter if your attacker is male or female. If you are atacked you should attack without forethought. Showing mercy towards an enemy, is showing cruelty to yourself. The hesitation brought on by milling over the gender issues in your head can get you killed. Survival is the only issue, and that doesnt afford the time to think about merciful actions or gender specific techniques. It means you strike first, strike hard, and do whatever, and I mean whatever it takes to win your survival.
  7. pgm316

    pgm316 lifting metal

    I know what your saying, but I still disagree ;)

    It does matter what you are labled, it often affects the rest of your life and you have to know you can live with it.

    You should consider what you are prepared to do in various situations, most situations I wouldn't go for maximum damage.
  8. Nordic_Blood

    Nordic_Blood New Member

    I have considered, and I most definately can live with it, a great deal of that assuredness comes from being a combat veteran, the rest is just my take on training, but I respectfully see and understand your point.
  9. Kwajman

    Kwajman Penguin in paradise....

    This question is one of the most basic questions in the military. That is why so often the terrorists, Vietcong, Iraqis, Palestinians, etc. etc....use women on occassion. The male mentality is to NOT be as suspicious of a woman as they would be of a man who might be approaching them. If the female is armed? Boooooom, another casualty.
  10. Nordic_Blood

    Nordic_Blood New Member

    Thank you Kwaj, just another way of saying what I was saying. Are you ex military? There is definitely a false dogme instilled in the minds of men when it comes to defense against women, and history shows how it has been exploited. Good point.
  11. Sonshu

    Sonshu Buzz me on facebook


    I dont hit girls
    Cant really hit girls
    Don't like sparing with girls

    I can teach them though - funny but due to my up bringing I can control a girl if I was attacked with locks etc but have never hit one - DESPITE many deserving a good smack.
  12. Kwajman

    Kwajman Penguin in paradise....

    Nordic, not military, but work very closely with several in my job. I see first hand the effects of training styles and how terrorism is approached.
  13. ladyhawk

    ladyhawk Valued Member

    It's not just the male mentality about being suspicious of a women. A child tends to trust
    a women more easily then a man.

    Also, it's not just gender but a person's appearance in general can be very deceiving.

    I'm sure most of us at some time have meet someone and by looking at them you would never guess they were a martial artist.

    Stay Aware and listen to your instinct.

    A gap in your concentration is a hole in your defense.
  14. Jim

    Jim New Member

    Wha... I don't believe it! LH isn't just a legend spoken about in hushed tones in the chat room. She actually exists! ;)

    Re: trusting a female, an (sadly) Australian who was a serial rapist and murderer in the USA used a woman he had abducted to lure other women to be abducted. It worked too well and it was a while before he was caught. I think there was a tele-movie about it.
  15. ladyhawk

    ladyhawk Valued Member

    Hello Jim,
    Yes, Ladyhawk takes flight on occasion to stretch her wings.
  16. McCloud

    McCloud New Member

    Hm... I disagree... Nordic_Blood has quite a good point there.

    I'd rather be labeled a bad person and woman-beater than lose an eye or get killed by some girl. Women are exactly as dangerous as men, if not more so, because the know that many people will just not strike back.
    A friend of mine, who's also into MA nevertheless got himself a nice punch into the solarplexus... The girl that punched him tried the same thing an me, only that I blocked it. It's not like we didn't deserve a slap :D maybe, but a serious punch like that is nothing a take from anybody without a reaction... Better safe than sorry. And also better to have time left to be sorry in than not ;)
    just my 2 cents.
  17. #1 Stutta

    #1 Stutta The New Boot

    Heh heh. Same here. But I do like them.
  18. #1 Stutta

    #1 Stutta The New Boot

    I don't think I would ever hit a girl with a closed fist. Never have and don't want to. There is one thing I'll do. That is to grab her by her shoulders and shake the hell out of her. I might even throw in some yelling. But that's really only if she goes for a nutshot.
  19. Yukimushu

    Yukimushu MMA addict

    hehe yeah, always be aware of those nut shots!!!
  20. KickChick

    KickChick Valued Member

    ... noticed that I've kept my mouth shut on this up until now?:D

    OK .... I have (on a few occasions in the past) thrown a punch at a man during very heated arguments. Sometimes it is best to physically attempt to hurt a man than to use words that you cannot take back in the future.... at least that is how I rationalize the situation.
    Now you may be wondering if the guys have ever hit me back and the answer is NO they haven't.

    As previously posted they would attempt to hold me down or turn and displace their aggression on a wall or any other inanimate object to show me that it could have been me instead!

    It really does depend on the situation. There are men that are physically abused by their women ... there are men that make inappropriate advances towards women either physically or verbally that may warrant a good slap upside the head to keep them in check.
    But most situations can be handled "verbally" rather then "physically" .... and other times they cannot. Sometimes it is best to just leave the situation and cool off rather than to resort to either one!

    Now as far as a self defense situation I believe a good rule is to use as much force as it would take to resolve the situation and nothing over and above.
    Last edited: Feb 4, 2004

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