Hello,have question

Discussion in 'Brazilian Jiu Jitsu' started by victim_no_more, Feb 21, 2007.

  1. Moosey

    Moosey invariably, a moose Supporter

    Let's hope so. I was just curious to know what the police could have done to make you more likely to report the crime. What would make you, personally, confident to walk into the station and tell them what happened?
  2. Tommy-2guns...

    Tommy-2guns... southpaw glassjaw

    firstly im verry sorry that this man has done this too you and i recomend you try and bring him to justice but as always its your call just dont loose heart and train awareness and martial arts/general fitness to help if it ever happens again aswell as being a confidence builder in itself.incidently the new found confidence from learning such things may be a deterant to attacks in itself.

    sounds like a wrestling move to me more than a BJJ one but im not too sure, it could just be the guy using weight and initiative. i advise a good reality based self defence system, many women-specific courses are around but dont be conned by people who talk of quick fix solouytions such as ' hit him here and this will happen and you will escape'.

    i recomend contacting the local authority and many rape support groups will have a recomended self defence instrcuor to help improve confidence and help better prepare you.

    are you in the uk? if so i can recomend a few good guys,if not then im sure some of the U.S based guys on here will have an idea or two.

    so personally i recomend a sports based system - by this i mean kick boxing,boxing,judo or BJJ.

    and also a self defence vbased system - the Self defence federation, core combatives,F.A.S.T,dimitri's shredder system.

    the self defence guys will help your verbal skills by way of mentally disarming,calming down the situation, they will also help your awareness,ability to evade situations such as this and teach you many important concepts such as the fence and adrenal response systems(not as complicated as it sounds trust me). And a sports system will improve your fitness therefore your ability to fight back aswell as giving you practical skills used in sparring that you will refine.

    all in all i wish you the best of luck and feel free to ask advice for places to train and im sure everyone will be willing to help.
  3. Hiroji

    Hiroji laugh often, love much

    If it was a BJJ or wrestling move, you need to let the people who train him know if you can, so they can stop training this animal.
  4. victim_no_more

    victim_no_more Valued Member

    Guess my train of thought was that after it happened I didn't want anyone to know, and that included the cops. If I reported it, it wouldn't have stopped there, others would have found out, and that was a scary concept for me. Almost like wearing a label on your forehead. Who knows, if I had to do it all over again, *maybe* I would have went right away where the chances of a conviction would have been higher. He said some pretty vile things after. People always say I'd do this or that if confronted with crime, but until your actually faced with it, we just don't know. Like someone said, maybe knowing self defense wouldn't have helped anyway since I couldn't even move and he was a powerhouse compared to me, but I'd feel better knowing that at least I know the basics. I'm guessing these classes will be expensive?!
  5. victim_no_more

    victim_no_more Valued Member

    No not yet.

    Ps. thanks tommy. I think I will stay around and get some reading info, and some of the jargon down.
  6. Su lin

    Su lin Gone away

    How long ago did it happen,if you don't mind me asking?

    Counselling would be a good idea. :)
  7. g-bells

    g-bells Don't look up!

    yes counselling would be a good idea
    you seem to have alot of built up hostility, completly understanable, that needs to be dealt with.
    he took away your innocense , don't let him ruin your life
  8. victim_no_more

    victim_no_more Valued Member

    6mo ago. I'll be fine, and it may not be noticeable( because you guys don't have any comparisons of how i was before) but I am getting better!
  9. ap Oweyn

    ap Oweyn Ret. Supporter

    You aren't crazy. Not by a long shot. But people are already giving you the most reasonable answer they have to offer. Go and learn some of what he claimed to know. In a martial arts class, you're constantly learning to counter what the other person is doing. And, often, the best way to learn the counter is to learn the details of the original movement.

    In truth, BJJ has lots and lots of ways of getting to a position like you describe. And none of us could offer you a solid gold way of getting out of it. The only way is to go and experience grappling yourself.

    That said, I cannot stress strongly enough that I think you should also be seeing a counselor. Particularly if you plan on doing martial arts. Simulating attacks could possibly be very hard on you emotionally. Particularly one that closely resembles the details of your attack. I think you'll have a much easier time if you're processing the experience with a counselor at the same time.

  10. Tommy-2guns...

    Tommy-2guns... southpaw glassjaw

    trust me, tell most martial arts instructors your story and theyd probably teach you for free!

    talking of free i do beleive that womens rape helpline folks will sort out free lessons for you, though they may not be the best.

    judo is usually cheap as is the the majority of kickboxing

    as your goal is self defence,gradings,competitions (pricey stuff)and the like wont be something you need, so at most youll need to buy a uniform and youll probably pay between £2-£5 per lessson but most self defence classes are plain clothes so you may not even need that.

    the self defence forum here, espeically the womens self defence sections has many topics on rape and rape prevention and many posters on there will help you out :)

    self defence classes may be a tad more expensive ive found, but shop around, find out whats in your area, and the MAP folks will check them out.

    best of luck

  11. victim_no_more

    victim_no_more Valued Member

    Tom, I didn't see a womans forum, have a link?

    Wow do I really sound hostile,LOL?
  12. Tommy-2guns...

    Tommy-2guns... southpaw glassjaw

  13. g-bells

    g-bells Don't look up!

    you have every right to be hostile. just don't let it take over your life.by talking with someone of proper education you'll learn how to deal with it

    your not hostile to us :eek:
  14. aikiwolfie

    aikiwolfie ... Supporter

    Due to the technical and specific nature of the question I'm moving this to the Brazilian Jiu Jitsu forum.

    I'd also like to add that if you haven't taken this to the police yet then you should. If he's done it once he'll likely do it again and you might not be his first victim.

    Let us know how things work out :)
  15. RunningDog

    RunningDog Valued Member

    To the Original poster:
    That doesn't sound like a specific 'move' from BJJ, but he obviously used his grappling ability to do this, which makes me feel physically sick.

    Unfortunately, as a couple of people have said, it's just not possible for you to learn how do defend any particular move from written advice given to you on the internet, even if it's good advice. The truth is that you would need to learn a grappling art yourself, and train hard at it, to be able to counter a **** with grappling skill.
    If BJJ has bad associations for you, you could try Judo, Sambo, Combat Sub Wrestling, Greco-roman wrestling or others. Judo is probably the most widespread, and generally the cheapest of these. It's an art involving throws, pins, jointlocks and chokes. Minimal striking, if any.
    However, BJJ is particularly good as a defence for rape or sexual assault scenarios, due to its emphasis on dominating opponents from 'guard' (where your opponent is between your legs)
    Good luck. You sound like a strong person, get yourself even stronger.
  16. kmguy8

    kmguy8 Not Sin Binned

    i have to post this here, because it's important and well timed
    all women should learn basic ground-fighting to help deal with date rape
    i commend your courage to train yourself and wish you all the best

  17. JayKayD

    JayKayD Meet my friend PAIN!

    Wow, this is a remarkable post. I don't really know what to say, but i recognise what you are trying to describe; it sounds like "tate-shiho-hiza-hishigi", a type of judo pin. The pic is below. The only way to defend it would probably to have been better than him at grappling. Without training it would be impossible to get out of this, especially if the person is physically stronger than you.

    It's a shame you can't find out where he trains and tell them what he used it for.

    Attached Files:

    Last edited: Feb 22, 2007
  18. RunningDog

    RunningDog Valued Member

    If there's any way you can do that, please please do.
  19. victim_no_more

    victim_no_more Valued Member

    I just got back from another ma board and someone posted the picture(technique) which gave me chills. It's called the 'grapevine'. That;s what he did.

    The other down fall is I don't know where he trains. My best bet is a Rad class.
  20. Oversoul

    Oversoul Valued Member

    That picture is of tate shiho hiza hishigi, but (putting it very bluntly), tate shiho hiza hishigi is a pretty crappy move. It's supposed to be a leg submission (that's what the arrows are indicating), but it basically just doesn't work on a resisting opponent (and I'd question whether it could even work on an unresisting opponent). A couple of the judo leglocks are like that.

    The pin you're thinking of is tate shiho gatame (which could look just like the picture, but without the arrows, which is probably what confused you). In BJJ, it's simply called the mount. In wrestling, it has various names but is usually called a "Saturday Night Ride" for some reason.

    As for escaping it, there are a few ways (some of which could become easy if the person is attempting to maneuver in order to rape you, which compromises the stability of the position as a hold down) of doing so, but against a larger, stronger, more skilled opponent, it must be quite a challenge.

    And I feel compelled to point out that getting the mount and using it isn't the only way of raping someone, nor is this bigger, stronger, more skilled (oh, and probably faster) assailant out of options if you do manage to get out of the mount.

    I think the only solution here, aside from not getting caught in this situation in the first place, is to eliminate at least one of your disadvantages. You probably can't become bigger or stronger than him, but if you're faster and more skilled, you could at least escape and run away (then shank him from behind later, if you're into that).
    Last edited: Feb 22, 2007

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