Go on with the fight?

Discussion in 'General Martial Arts Discussion' started by TNT Tommy, Oct 1, 2005.

  1. TNT Tommy

    TNT Tommy New Member

    There have been times when a sports celebrity has lost a family member due to death, and there is an event before the funeral. More often than not, the athlete will participate in the event after the death but before the funeral of the loved one. Their reason for participating in the event is "I'm playing this game today because my "loved one" would have wanted me to play this game today.

    I don't know if I could do this. If I lost a loved one, and had a scheduled fight before the funeral, I don't think I could go ahead and fight. I would be too sad and stressed and couldn't focus well enough to fight effectively.

    How about you?

    TNT Tommy
     
  2. Hiroji

    Hiroji laugh often, love much

    yeh i think i would be the same as you. If it was family member and friends who i see everyday i would be too upset for sure. I tend to take those things very badly.
     
  3. SickDevildog

    SickDevildog Lost In The Sauce

    Hmmm

    Never happened to me, I guess it depends how close the deceased was to you.

    I think I couldn't do it neither if it was someone from my imediate family or one of my grandmas or my grandpa.

    No way I could concentrate on any task at hand because of the grief.
     
  4. Hades

    Hades the deskjob boxer

    well.. on the other hand,

    Are you being haunted by you own thoughts during training? are you constantly beign distracted by yourself?

    I'm not.. but when practice is over, it immediately comes back, sometimes even during training, but not for long, a nice jab in my face usually wakes me up instantly..

    So, I think if you are allready well-trained, and a very skilled fighter, then, yes, you just might be able to do it.

    But hey, everybody deals with shizzle their own way.. so..
     
  5. Dojo

    Dojo Shotokan fanatic

    I had something like this: a very close person die (my grandfather, who was like my father all these years). For 1 week I couldn't do anything. I had exams at college, couldn't test, couldn't go to work, not even Karate. After 1 week I was able to get out and I resumed MA classes. It did me good, but I don't think I could have fought prior to the funeral. I could barely talk, let alone train.
     
  6. Garibaldi

    Garibaldi Valued Member

    To be honest, if it hasn't happened then you don't know how it would affect you.

    These people, by your definition are "sports celebrities" and they have reached that pinnacle of position by dedication, sacrifice and hard work. Now whilst the death of a loved one would still obviously affect them emotionally in the same way as any one at a lower level in competition, it may also give them the focus to achieve greater success as a memorial to their loved family member.

    I'm sure to these people that by NOT competing and missing the chance of success, they feel they are somehow letting down their loved one, who may well have made sacrifices to support the training and dedication of their "sports celebrity" family member.

    Look at it the other way. If it was a close member of your family that was so talented they had given everything for this chance of success and it was you that died, would you want them missing out on their whole life, career and future? If it were possible, what advice would you give them from the grave!?
     
  7. Yohan

    Yohan In the Spirit of Yohan Supporter

    It's different for everyone, but when my grampa died, I was more releived than anything. He'd had a hard time of it and died after a long struggle. I was sad after he died, but I have no regrets and I'm happy he's in a better place. The greif people experience when a loved one dies is not grief for the dead, it is greif for the living. The hardest thing isn't dealing with the loss of a loved one, it is going on without that person that you care about.
     
  8. ~Natsumi Lam~

    ~Natsumi Lam~ New Member

    i wouldnt want to do it.... i would take it out on teh person i am fighting with. It wouldnt be right for me to approach a fight with all that pent up anger and hostility. But thats why i wouldnt.


    ~NL~
     
  9. tellner

    tellner Valued Member

    Grief can do strange things to a person. Frankly, I think the Jewish customs are very sensible. Friends and neighbors bring the first couple meals. For the first day or two the family stays alone and wails, cries, tears their clothes and otherwise acknowledges sorrow. Then they go into a formal mourning. They turn all mirrors and pictures to the wall and sit on boxes instead of regular furniture. People come in without saying hello, leave without saying goodbye and talk about the deceased.

    Regular business stops. Mourners don't get married for a certain period after the death.

    Close relatives go to the synagogue every day for a year. At a specified time in the service all the mourners say a special prayer called the Mourner's Kaddish. The prayer is repeated afterwards on the anniversary of the death.

    I'm not doing this to push a particular ethnic group's customs so much as to show how people deal with death in a culture that is more open about it. The most salient bit is that nobody expects you to behave normally or perform your regular duties under the weight of loss and bereavement.

    It can go the other way, though. Many peoples have a tradition of offerings for the dead. It might be saying prayers for the soul of the deceased, burying favorite objects with them, sacrificing something of value or holding funeral games. The games are dedicated to the deceased perhaps to keep memory alive, possibly in the unconscious hope that the spirits of the dead will watch and enjoy the spectacle.

    Which way you go depends a lot on your cultural background and personal makeup.
     
  10. Kwajman

    Kwajman Penguin in paradise....

    I would look at it this way. If I were a famous athlete and say my dad died. I may not want to play but a lot of people paid a lot of money to see me. That wouldn't be fair and regardless of whether or not it was "right", you need to suck it up and play. Plus all those people are betting on the outcome of the game and if you don't play, think of all the money that would be lost.
     
  11. The Kaiser

    The Kaiser New Member

    Kwajman, I don't want to take sides, as I'm not quite sure where I stand on the issue. However, you'd have to be a jerk to whine about how someone didn't play because a someone close to them died. I'm not quite sure if it would be fair for the athlete to compete against his will because someone had money on the game.
     

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