Had some thoughts about the whole Depp v Heard debacle and thought I'd vent a bit. I feel as though it has really set back the cause and awareness of domestic abuse and violence. Both for men and women but women in particular. As a caveat obviously I don't really know what went on between them. They both seem like nightmares to be in a relationship with in their own ways. It does seem to me that Heard was the main instigator of violence and abuse, maybe has some personality/mental health issues, and her accusations against Depp mostly (if not entirely) made-up. And that seems to be the legal finding too. She seems to have scuppered her life and career in pursuit of "something". Money? Fame? Vindictiveness? Jealousy of Depp's fame and popularity? And that's the sad part of it I think. It feeds into the "women just make accusations up" rhetoric we see from people trying to downplay violence and abuse against women and girls. It perhaps sheds some light on abuse against men (even rich, handsome ones like Depp) but again that is a ploy men sometimes use to take attention away from the larger problem of violence against women. All around it seems ti have trivialised domestic abuse. Thoughts?
But surely that's all on Amber Heard being a garbage person. Unless you're saying Depp shoulda just clammed up and taken it in which case... nah.
I've not watched much of the proceedings, but I have seen a few interesting things in relation to it. Why the judge in the UK found it was reasonable for The Sun to call Depp a wife beater, but the jury in the US didn't: Why did the Depp-Heard libel outcomes differ in the US and UK? Misogynistic groups in the US spent a lot of money to smear Amber Heard: The Daily Wire Spent Thousands of Dollars Promoting Anti-Amber Heard Propaganda Personality disorders are contested by scientists and have their roots in hysteria diagnoses. They are routinely used to discredit abused women: https://www.victimfocus.org.uk/predictably-amber-heard-just-got-diagnosed-with-bpd-and-hpd
Yeah. It is a messy situation with a lot of mud flinging. I didn't articulate it very well but one reason this is bad for abuse of women is the way Heard has been torn apart on the media in exactly the way women fear will happen if they come forward. Criticising her for crying, not crying, what she wore each day, her sexual history, her state of mind, sanity, etc. For me the most damning "evidence" (and as I've said I don't really know what happened and we've all seen less evidence than the various people on the jury and judges) was the recording of Heard saying she was "only" hitting Depp and wasn't "punching" him and calling into question his masculinity, etc for not being able to take it. Nasty audio that was. And her trying to get around the fact she didn't donate the money she said she'd donate (playing word games trying to conflate the words donate and pledge). That sets up an impression of a person who is both willing to be physically abusive AND play fast and loose with the truth.
Not saying that at all. As I said I think both come out of it looking like nightmares to be around. Don't think I'd want to be in the same room as either of them let alone enter a relationship or marriage with them. But we are all judging it on partial information. Even the judges and jurors didn't get full information. I'd even go as far as to say that Heard and Depp don't remember some incidents as they really happened (drink, drugs, etc). I'd say there's a more than fair chance that in some ways it was a mutually abusive relationship. But seeing that play out in the public sphere I think has set back the cause of reducing domestic violence. For women in particular because it's now a very public example (true or not) where "she crazy!" seems to be a prominent opinion.
Definitely. It's a tale as old as time, isn't it? Loveable rogue taken advantage of by insufferable harpy. It's an easy narrative to follow. Looks like #metoo finally ran out of steam. I have no idea what the truth of it is, but I presume it wasn't revealed in the courtroom theatrics. I also default to presuming anyone in Hollywood is a narcissistic weirdo. Rebecca Watson made a good video about it, taking one YouTube commentary and pointing out the amount of bias in it. She also mentions a study that showed how bad people are at guaging truthfulness in others, even though most people think they're really good at it:
If anything truthful has come out of this pantomime it's that that phrase is still maintaining its veracity.
