Bad puns

Post your bad puns here.
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Today I met a spider that gave me his buisness card.

Turns out he's a web designer.
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Why was the scarecrow promoted?

He was outstanding in his field.
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Russia was slow to recover after WWII.

It kept Stalin around.
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I went to a B&B in Paris and for breakfast was given one egg - I thought this was a bit stingy, but apparently one egg is "un oeuff"

 

http://www.hejibits.com/comics/breadwinner/

 

I went to the zoo the other day, but all they had was one dog.

It was a shizu!

 

Damn you Fish! That site had me find this strip and now I am getting funny looks for laughing my ass off at work!!!

http://www.hejibits.com/comics/its-a-mii/

 

This thread is just PUNishment

 

Can you Nazi? I Think it's Hitlerious!

 

No such thing as a bad pun.

 

How do you spot a blind man in a nudist camp?

It's not hard.

 

http://www.hejibits.com/comics/haunted-humor/

 

All those Nazi jokes bring me out of mein kampfort zone Anne Frankly, I find them tasteless.

 

Auschwitz you would take me seriously!

 

Now you've done it, I'm Fuhrerious after you. I'm gonna punch you in the nose and you'll bleed all over your white shirt. It will then dry and you will Eva Braun shirt.

 

This thread completley down spiraled into nazi jokes. I have to say when this thread started I did nazi that coming.

 

The "not see" pun was already used, you can do better than that, there are so many puns to Jews from. I understand its not easy though, it takes years to train this skill and requires lots of concentration.

@Chadderz: Do you think we should shower how to make proper puns?

 

Jokes about the Holocaust really aren't funny. Clean your act up before you embarrass yourself.

 

Agreed, my grandfather died in a concentration camp.

He fell off his guard tower.

 

Jesus...I take back what I said about there not being any bad puns.
I guess I had a failure of imagination.

 

... I can't find the pun in this one? it is too well hidden... =p

OT:

Did you hear about the crab who wouldn't share his sandwich?

he was a little shellfish