Pretend there is a cool name here - log

Discussion in 'Training Logs' started by Latikos, Jan 11, 2017.

  1. Knee Rider

    Knee Rider Valued Member Supporter

    What basic kickboxing techniques are giving you trouble?
     
  2. Latikos

    Latikos Valued Member

    Mainly kicks.
    I might be able to do them well enough against pads, but have to do them kihon-like, into the air.

    Side- and roundhousekick are worse, especially with the front leg.
    When doing counters as Uke I can do them a bit better, because I can "jump" a little step with my hind leg and it still works out well enough for my partner to do the counter.

    Also when doing the same kicks with my hind leg putting the leg back into the hind position is giving me trouble; I usually put it down on front of me (I know, I can run into a punch like this; it's still from HKD, when we were told to do it and punch right away ourselves).

    Plus being not flexible enough since my sprained my groin; I can kick (side- and roundhouse) with my left okay enough (for my standard), but my right leg doesn't get as high; which has me always surprised, since it was my *left* groin that was injured.

    The good thing is, that is something I can do at home on Friday and hopefully have it at least good enough for Saturday; I don't have any illusions regarding kickboxing, as I'm more than sure, I won't become particularly good at it :oops:
     
  3. Knee Rider

    Knee Rider Valued Member Supporter

    I would do the air kicks:

    1) Super slow.
    2) at a height you can comfortably perform them at.
    3) with perfect mechanics.

    Can't see anyone having a problem with that especially seeing as you have a groin issue.

    You can get good at anything with time... Don't put yourself down :) if your log is anything to go by you have all the ingredients for success!
     
  4. Latikos

    Latikos Valued Member

    The problem when doing them slowly, is that I lose my balance half the time :oops::D

    I look at it from the bright sides:
    1. My coach wouldn't let me start, if he thinks I couldn't do it. He can be a pain in the butt, but in a different way :D
    2. If I don't do great but only ok, I would still pass, because he supports people who train hard. He would also expect me -rightfully!- to keep working hard; plus being half sick is a "bonus" at the moment anyway.
    And: His "ok" would still be better than lots of trainers "good", since all my coaches and teachers are very demanding, luckily.

    Also it's probably the last time, I will be doing two gradings of mine one the same day, since the colors now start getting a bit darker.


    I'm lacking good dynamics though; me Sensei says it's because I still think too much, and he might actually be right, since my last grading, a spontaneous one, was actually something I was satisfied with.

    I... start babbling.
    Sorry :confused:
     
  5. Latikos

    Latikos Valued Member

    So, I took yesterday off.
    Couldn't be bothered to go today, since my teacher wouldn't have been there anyway.
    I'm still hoarse, so the grading could be "fun" lol

    But days off are bad.
    Very bad.
    I ate wayyyy too much rubbish, just because I could :oops::rolleyes:
    With the next month, as latest, I really should try to lose some more pounds, that wobble around :D
     
  6. Latikos

    Latikos Valued Member

    Around five or five and half hours I spent on the mats today (including an hour of kids training) and I still don't know my entire program right away.
    That's inexcusable really.

    I'm more or less confident for Karate and I know at least 90% of my counters for kickboxing. I think.
    But I struggle more than should be possible, to remember my self defense techniques; it's unbelievable.
    It's not a problem, once I see what I want to do, but I really shouldn't have to look up, what I want to do!
    It's not even much I have to show after all.

    I decided to not do anything anymore today.
    But to take some further looks into it tomorrow.
    As in getting up, reading and writing the program down (I tend to remember better, when I write it down) and go through the basic techniques and Kata one more time.
    Than it's up to the Dojo, and maybe(!) take another look at some of the stuff.
    But my priority is certainly to finally remember the SD-stuff. And if only for the duration of the grading :oops:
     
  7. Knee Rider

    Knee Rider Valued Member Supporter

    How did you get on??
     
  8. Latikos

    Latikos Valued Member

    Thanks for asking.

    Finally getting to terms with it :rolleyes:

    The good: I passed both gradings, and both were very good according to my coach.

    The not so good, or more precisely: The frustrating part :D

    Karate: For yellow and orange you get told part of the techniques you have to show and the others you add.
    For green/ 3rd Kyu, what I did, you chose yourself.
    So I did.
    Wrote it down, learned it, changed it, wrote it down, ...
    The normal.

    BUT: I didn't give my documents to my instructor.
    The last green belt grading there was, and I was Uke for it, he just said "Show me xy amount of z".
    So I expected that again.
    Instead I was told to show the same as my partner for her orange belt plus 1.
    Wasn't much of a problem honestly, because I trained everything for Kihon in "+2" at the very least - after all, I know he can be... demanding ;)

    What became a problem were the combinations: I tried so hard to remember my own (and was for some stupid reason struggling; I finally managed to remember my entire program yesterday morning, so I was fine in the end) that I never looked at the old ones from the book.
    There was no reason too, as I had my own and was expected to show own creations.
    Yeah.
    Until my instructor told me, to do the same :rolleyes:

    I considered telling him, that I have my own, but one of the rules we have is: No discussion during gradings.
    You do what you are told.
    Especially me, because apparently I tend to discuss too much ;)
    So I kept my mouth shut and screwed up the combinations.

    I also had to show a little more then was asked per program, but I'm used to that, so it wasn't really surprising.

    My partner, our instructor and and a fourth were out for dinner afterwards.
    I told him there, how *he* screwed up my grading (with a grin, don't worry ^^) and that I was actually supposed to show my own combinations.
    He laughed at me and told me I should have said something. When I mentioned (with the waitress right next us :cool: ) that he would have killed me he was first "Hey, what are the people supposed to think of me now" and than grinned.
    My partner and I looked at each other like dorks; we both know saying something in certain moments isn't the best idea after all. And as mentioned above: A no-no when being tested :D

    So it's not, that it was a close call due to the combinations, but it had me frustrated :D
    I'm allowed to show him the combinations on Friday though; won't change anything for my grading, but at least I will know, if they were any good.
    And I can take them for blue now :D


    Kickboxing actually went better, than I expected!
    He made it a bit easier for us, when he wanted us to show most of the basic techniques (especially the kicks) at a (passive) partner.
    That was great; I can do them a bit than, and I certainly can do them x-times as good compared to kicking into thin air.
    So I was actually satisfied with them.

    The counters went well also, even better than when practicing.

    The self defense techniques were great!
    Okay, I did something else once than I planned, because he made us do them incredibly fast, so that there was no thinking possible.
    Our instructor said afterwards, he wished that the SD-part of my partner and me were filmed, because they were so good.
    That was nice, I admit.


    In the end, he also mentioned, that he liked my grading (Karate was mentioned earlier; we did a Karate-part and Kickbxing-part) and that I should keep going - something I never even considered.
    My plan was to somehow get orange, so I can keep wearing that belt (got it borrowed from my former JJ-teacher); I never expected to do another grading in Kickboxing, despite I like the idea of my Sensei, to get at least blue/2nd Kyu in every art I train.

    Now I actually do consider doing another grading at some point.
    I have eight months at the very least to think about it and as long as I want to decide about it :rolleyes:


    Well, that got longer, then I was planning, sorry.
     
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  9. Knee Rider

    Knee Rider Valued Member Supporter

    Well done! All that hard work paid off, stress head! :p
     
    Latikos likes this.
  10. Latikos

    Latikos Valued Member

    Thanks!

    Yeah, I guess it did.

    The sort of downside to train more MAs, no matter how much they work with each other: I have to start for ATK now (teacher would like me to take the next grading; another 3rd Kyu) and especially 2nd Kyu of JJ :D

    ATK shouldn't be too bad, as most I have to show is pre-set.
    I just need to remember the stuff and make it more fluid. I also wouldn't mind, if I take the grading in three months or a few weeks.

    JJ should be more intersting: I have to create my entire program on my own the first time.
    So far my Sensei told us what he wanted to see; the reason being that the higher grades can show and help the lower belts, when preparing for grading, getting a basic level of techniques and ideas, looking into every part of the art, even if there is something you don't like.

    Now, that Karate and Kickboxing are done, I will start with that.
    And I'm actually looking forward to it, as it will show, how much I can work with my knowledge.
    My Sensei also wants to me, to do to my next test as fast as possible; which is interesting, as he doesn't care much for belts in themselves (it took two years for me to get from 5th to 4th Kyu :D), so I think the reason must be, that he thinks I'm more than ready.
    But the latter is speculation and I will have to ask him at some point.

    Now I have two more weeks of preparation for the competition; that should be intense, even though not as demanding on body and mind.
    After this I will also start to train with my other JJ-teacher for his 4th Dan in April; that should be fun and so much too learn! I start drooling again already.

    And at the same time working in my grading and enjoying that. Hopefully.
    :D

    I think I still might be glad for the roughly two weeks off during the winter holidays though :D
     
  11. Latikos

    Latikos Valued Member

    Well, I'm getting good at being lazy - I kept the day off, despite free training was offered.
    And tomorrow as well (aside from the free training; tomorrow is none).
    ;)

    Yesterday was interesting though: Before kids training three of us (the main coach for the kids, me and the person in our club, that is the head of kids-stuff with us; I don't know the English term and neither seems dict.cc).
    It looks like the program I wrote for the kids will be the one, they get trained after (as in: What they will show for gradings), which is interesting and also kind of cool.
    For me anyway ;)

    Since hardly any kids were there afterwards (five kids in the first group, two in the second), we could focus a bit on ukemi and the kids.
    Two were... well, sort of useless, but at least we could focus a bit on ukemi; I would have preferred to do it longer, but stopped it after a while, because otherwise the concentration of the kids would have been gone anyway.


    My own training was kind of fun.
    We did some throws and I picked a partner roughly 25or so kilos heavier than I am :)
    I like to train with him, he's nice, thinking and careful until he knows what he does, so the height and weight difference doesn't matter much really (aside from me being to weak; I really need to get stronger, despite correct technique :rolleyes::confused:)

    Afterwards some light (very, very light) competition training for the 11th.
    On Thursday we will get more serious again.
    After last week my partners teacher looked over our program, this week my Sensei will probably take a look at it, since we're going to train for it during his lesson.
    I wonder if I still will be allowed to mention him as my master after he saw the program :D
     
  12. Latikos

    Latikos Valued Member

    Awesome day.
    Two hours kids training, of which I spent nearly one hour off the mats, talking to three mothers.
    Two of their kids might get graded by the end of the year, but both are concerned if that works out.

    The son of one of these Moms is 7 (soon to be eight) and didn't got graded in two and a half years. too long for a kid his age, if you ask me, so I told her, I'd like to get him fit for the grading, but can't promise anything.
    The good thing is: She totally trusts me for that matter!If I say he can try, he will, if I say "Summer" it's that - so she won't be mad, if it doesn't work out, but will also sent him twice a week again; because on the second day the little one usually goes breakdancing for kids ^^
    So, that was actually good.


    My own training was... well, you have got to love my Sensei!

    A partner and I are training for a show-competition.
    My second Jitsu-teacher saw us train and said, so to speak: Great, keep going like this!
    His teacher, usually very critical said: A little more power, but aside - great.
    My Sensei was, again so to speak: That's crap
    :D

    He gave us many, many point we have to work on and good advise what to change or do better, but it was typical, I nearly laughed out loud :D
    Next week we plan to show it again and see if it's better.
    With a little luck we get the opinions from all of the above plus one more again.
    Slowly I start to get really, really nervous...
     
  13. Latikos

    Latikos Valued Member

    I'm getting good a being lazy.
    Damn it.

    Today I only assisted with the Karate-Kids and did ATK afterwards; skipped Karate and Kickboxing.
    And right now I'm glad, that I now have two days with doing nothing :cool:

    I noticed during ATK that my concentration was bad and as Karate was done by another instructor as usual I decided to skip.
    Not, because I don't like the other one! I do. He's nice and makes good training.
    But it would also have been another stress factor for me anyway.
    Besides, I did consider last weekend already to take today off entirely, because for the next six or seven weeks I have appointments for every weekend as well; aside from one (not sure, if I go to a seminar first or not yet) all sport related.
    And I probably also add another hour of kids training for the next four weeks, to prepare them for a potential grading...

    So today was lot of Kihon with some kids and afterwards some gun techniques and trying to do the yellow and orange belt program for ATK once; here I noticed that I am on a loss today, as I screwed that up.
    Which is awesome!
    After all, I learned today, that my ATK teacher would like to test me for green by the end of November.

    So, people might guess is: I consider running amok this year!
     
  14. Latikos

    Latikos Valued Member

    "End of November".
    My teacher and I have very different views on what is the "end of November"!
    Grading would be on the 22nd, test run of who gets allowed to is on the 15th.

    So I have one week to try and learn the problem in a way, that I could graded for it.
    The teacher said, I should get fit for it, after I asked him, if he wants me to grade.

    So I asked another student if she would Uke once more for me.
    Should be an interesting week: Monday, Wednesday and Friday is totally ATK day, to work on the grading.
    Tuesday and Thursday the last practices before the show of Saturday.

    I should my life right now, but instead I enjoy that stress even.
    I really am a psycho!
     
  15. Latikos

    Latikos Valued Member

    It's pretty much official now: From now on I have the say what gets done in the second kids group with the older kids.
    The blackbelt coach will also be there, but I have to decide what gets done, and all that belongs to it.

    Our boss had the talk today and so I got to give my first training, in which I decided what gets done and whatnot.
    Slowly starting to get really nervous about it, to be honest.
    I just mustn't screw it up!


    First kids group was okay, second group was rather full: 16 kids!
    Awesome day to start :confused:

    I let the other coach to the warm-up, while I signed who was there; we always did it like that, so why change it today?
    I can warm them up often enough, I'm sure, and I'm not the biggest fan of it anyway :D

    Training went okay actually, but boy, I still need to find a way, to shorten the time it takes to do ukemi!

    I showed the kids a new technique, they hadn't done so far like it, but knew all the single elements.
    It really worked out well, to my surprise.
    Second technique... I'm rather sure it would have worked, but the time flew by and therefore it was mainly trying a couple of times.

    Since some the kids should get graded soon (if I manage to get them fit!), I offered today that I would add another hour of training on Friday; I'm wondering how that will work out!


    My own Jitsu-training got a bit misused, as I used it to train for the ATK-grading; maybe I will get it done until next week, maybe I won't.
    Should be interesting to see either way.
    The only reason why I would prefer it to work out: I could prove something to myself.
    Being not utterly useless in the arts, but only a little, so to speak :D


    After JJ (*cough* ATK *cough*) my show-partner and I worked a little on our techniques. Mainly to see on what positions we start best, so we don't leave the mats, when it comes to the "competition".
    I need to learn how to Kiai more during these techniques, so it gets a better show.
    I hope to get that done tomorrow!
     
  16. Latikos

    Latikos Valued Member

    Tuesday until today were... taxing actually.

    On Tuesday I went to the club of my competition partner, so that his teacher can have a last look at us, before we start on Saturday.
    It went well enough, that the teacher told us that we were good; with him being usually very critical that was nice really.

    Wednesday... Karate-Kids.
    I had the whitebelts and did some Kihon with them, which they actually manage okay, by now.

    ATK... I could have kicked the teacher ;)
    Next Wedneyday he'll decide who can have a go at the gradings.
    So what is the logical to do?
    Right! Free techniques, that have nothing to do with the grading at all for more than half the time!
    After that I went through the free grading techniques with a stick.

    Sidenote that I found funny: On Monday one of my Jitsu teacher tried to offer his advice on the the techniques.
    I had six of eight down.
    He manage to show five or six techniques (my partner and I trained for ATK at that moment and the teacher spent most of his time with the students who did what he told them. Not because he was lazy) - all of which I already had in my program.
    I was actually starting to feel embarrassed, but he thought it funny, because it would show, that I am a good learner with taste ;) :D

    Today.
    Minis first. 16 kids, between four and seven. With two trainers. God help. :rolleyes:
    Before practice even started I had several kids glued to me...
    For this group the other trainer still has the say, but I would have chosen to make it a little more varied today.

    The older ones.
    My second lesson, that I was boss :cool:;)
    I repeated the last technique a few minutes, which went really well.
    They managed to do it surprisingly good, some remembered the Japanese name of the elbow strike, some others the difference between O-Soto-Gari and O-Soto-Otoshi (only forgot most of the second name) - so I was pleasantly surprised.

    It doesn't mean it will work out in the end, but anyway!

    Afterwards my partner for Saturday and I went to my Sensei for a last presentation of our show-program on Saturday.
    I managed to work with Kiai and apparently it was good :eek:
    Sensei (he doesn't get called that btw.) actually said something positive :eek::D
    He even asked me if I was making fun of him the last two years (he didn't said it that politely though :oops:).
    I guess I just pushed the expectations for my next gradings even higher lol
     
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  17. Latikos

    Latikos Valued Member

    Long day today.

    No practice at all for tomorrow. So I will probably screw it up.

    What I did today was an extra session with my Jitsu-Kids, to try to get them ready for grading.
    One of them, who is having a real hard time with Ukemi, finally managed to roll forwards; okay, his head touches the floor, but it's so much more compared to before, so I gladly work from there!

    Afterwards came the Karate-Kids. Grading as well.
    I had two beginners and they did surprisingly good.

    ATK was my grading program (God, I will be so glad if I don't have to work on any grading for a few weeks lol ).
    Orange and yellow belt were good (they get shown as well), green needed a little work; no surprise there for me, as that is the exact reason, why I don't know, if get to start or wait a few months.

    So after ATK my partner and I used Karate and Kickboxing as well.
    I managed to remember the program properly (finally!) and think(!) I got most of it done okay.

    We will add two or so more hours on Monday and than see, what my ATK teacher says on Wednesday.
     
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  18. Latikos

    Latikos Valued Member

    Failed at the competition.
    Video below (I hope; it's the first time I try to load something up :oops::rolleyes:).



    And yeah, even when not looking too closely I saw some mistakes, like Shiho Nage had half a second hesitation in it, when doing Seoi-Nage I would have needed to go deeper down into the knees...
    And I think it wasn't spectacular enough. Or... you know... at all.




    Monday was my fourth time, where I had control over the second kids group.

    The little ones were... difficult.
    I still think part of it is the problem, that the other coach doesn't switch enough between things.
    4-7 year olds don't have the focus to concentrate for 20 minutes on a throw and a hold, in my opinion.


    The older ones...
    I'm afraid I have much to learn left - which wouldn't be half as bad, if I weren't supposed to lead some of them to their next grading soon.

    I mean - I think(!) I managed as good as I can.
    I repeated a few techniques and added one or two more (they don't have to show much after all).
    I made sure, they remembered the difference between O-Soto-Gari and O-Soto-Otoshi; went through some chokes again and let one boy try a choke on me, so I would get a better idea of he did wrong (which worked; I know what he did wrong, but I'm struggling a bit, to explain/ show it in a way, that he understands it).
    But I'm still not sure whether or not I will get even one of them ready for being graded.
    I would have loved to have more then four weeks for that :oops:


    My own training went toward the ATK possible grading.
    I managed to remember the program and we went several times through it.


    On Tuesday I took a day off.
    Sensei wouldn't be there, I was tired and cold and meh and everything sucks anyway (still feel like that, to be honest, but I won't allow it to take up much of my training; I won't just give up.).


    Today was awesome!
    Just awesome!
    Karate-Kids went okay enough; did some Ukemi with the whitebelts and afterwards SD-techniques.

    Than came ATK.
    The awesome part!

    My tics came back and were bad enough that I got sent off the maps for a time at the beginning.
    My endurance is very bad and having someone else doing the warm-up didn't exactly help.
    So my Tics came back, I was sent off because it didn't look good (less to be mean, more because there were new people there. I think anyway.).
    Felt like poo for a while and the only thing making it even better would have been a witness to that!

    I was asked back in once the warm-up was done and the teacher took a look at the potential testees for next week.
    My free techniques weren't great yet, so I did work a while more on them.
    In the end I got the permission to try for the grading in seven days.
    I should be happy about it, but since everything is meh at best at the moment I'm just "whatever", I'm afraid.
    Ah well, I will keep training for it on Friday, maybe a little on Monday and then see what happens.
    Only because I feel crappy, doesn't mean I will screw it up.

    And if I pass the grading I at least managed to prove something to myself.
     
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  19. Latikos

    Latikos Valued Member

    Thursday and Friday.

    Worked with the kids on their program for the grading and really start getting concerned on how to get the white-yellow kids ready for yellow
    They do try, without a doubt, but some things are giving them trouble; like O-Goshi.

    Well, it's still a little time left and I will see.

    We also did some theory in the end, as they will need that too.
    I asked them about our Dojo-etiquette (Hygiene, being on time, respect and the such... everyone knows that, I'm sure).
    I just let them give me examples, after I explained to them "Dojo-etiquette means, what you are allowed and not allowed to do here".
    And seriously: They gave me so much more examples, than any grown-up ever managed to get together.
    So many even, that I should crucify them every time, they misbehave, because they obviously know exactly what they are supposed to behave like :D


    Another day, where Sensei couldn't come to training, so I still didn't have to face him; will have to wait until next Thursday.
    I might have a stomach ulcer until then :oops:

    Since he wouldn't be there I stayed at the other club.
    We did some gun disarm techniques and I was allowed to be Uke - I still love doing that :rolleyes: :D
    In the end I gave some resistance (after everything was shown as to not disrupt class). It's always fun. It also always hurts :D , but we have fun nonetheless!

    Afterwards my teacher showed me his choke-series for his grading (we do his 4th Dan next year) and I might gracelessly steal it for my own grading, when it will come :cool:
    I really liked it: Starts standing with a choke that actually works standing! Goes to the ground and different position there as well.
    The only bad thing is, that it's only six techniques; we both would have liked it to be wayyyy more :(


    Friday, today, long day.

    Met with some of my Jitsu-Kids again to work on their grading.
    We did Ko-Uchi-Gake again, which was definitely working better, than yesterday! That was nice.
    O-Goshi is still giving them trouble; the younger ones I showed Uki-Goshi - which is giving them trouble as well.
    The whole turning so far in, that their back is at the stomach of the partner is really difficult for them. I remember having the same problem, more or less.

    Towards the end, I check if any of the kids remembered their three SD-techniques - and with some work, they really did!
    I was rather surprised here.
    What also had me surprised are two more things: One particular kid is doing better, than I dared to expect. I actually hadn't even considered him for grading already, until I saw him do a single technique two weeks ago.
    He is still doing good, when he does train (he keeps waiting a lot, until I am around to actually look) and I think I actually might get him and his brother ready in time!

    The second thing: When we worked on remembering the technique, I asked them who would remember at all and afterwards we worked our way together to get it complete - the kids were so diligent in offering their ideas and memories, that it was just ... beautiful actually.
    You saw them thinking, being happy when they were right or were even chosen to show something.
    That was a moment, where you actually remember, why you do it.

    Karate-Kids were next.
    I got three white-yellow kids and went through a hold with them and their SD-techniques for their next grading.
    They did surprisingly well, in my opinion.
    They remembered what to do and one techniques was new and they still managed fairly good.
    One of them especially, but that didn't surprise me, since he's doing well from the beginning.

    ATK was mainly getting ready for the grading.
    So my partner and I did just that: Program of the grading.

    Karate:
    The plan was, to keep working on ATK again.
    We ended doing most of the Karate-class and only chimed in roughly 10 minutes in the end.
    It was enough though; what I can't do by now...

    Kickboxing...
    I suck.
    That's just it.
    Spinning roundhouse kick became a spinning hook kick nearly all the time.
    It got better after the most weird trick, I ever experienced so far lol:
    My teacher (the Jitsu-teacher from above with the upcoming grading) made me turn and then just hold me tugged close, made me start the kick and so gave me the opportunity to pay my entire attention to keeping the leg more straight, without losing balance.
    It looked utterly ridiculous (I saw it in the mirror), but it got better afterwards :D

    My backkick will always be a "back side-kick", I'm afraid, and I move like a scarecrow for a spinning backfist, because I forget to put my foot back in the end.

    Trying it in sparring didn't work at all for me.
    I pretty much get beaten up most of the time, so I feel like "I need to survive" more than "start playing with the new stuff" :oops:


    I also got feedback to my competition video above.
    It pretty much said it was crap.
    I shouldn't be, but I was actually glad, that at least someone was giving an honest opinion on it :oops:
     
  20. Latikos

    Latikos Valued Member

    Today I was on an awesome seminar!
    JJJ, not even with difficult stuff and nothing that new, but I totally enjoyed it!
    I saw lots of it a long while ago, so to get to do it again after some years, with an entirely different set of knowledge I have myself, was really interesting and fun!

    The teacher, who gave the seminar was a very nice guy as well, who made sure to explain why something worked and who properly looked around, when we were practicing; also very open, when it came to questions

    Also: Got there, because one of my former teachers hosted it.
    So I got to see him again, talk with him... just great.
    I didn't realize nor expected, how good that would make me feel - although I'm sure I bored him to death, when I kept talking in the end :oops: :rolleyes:

    We even exchanged a couple of sentences about my competition (he was the one, who told me it was crap :D ); I was surprised to hear, that part of my bad-doing was due to my partner and his attacks.
    Doesn't excuse my mistakes in the slightest, and they are there! More than enough! But I though it interesting nonetheless.



    Two downsides though, but both not directly connected to the seminar:
    The real big one: I had a panic attack again. It's been a while, since I was that... "damaged".

    I had to get inside on my own (yeah, I know it sounds stupid, but I just can't do things like that); so after I finally managed to touch the door, with a heart rate that's not good for me, I even started feeling really dizzy (literally; I expected a couple of times to collapse) and bad.
    In the end I managed to get to the gym, staring at the ground, too late but they hadn't started yet - and was *so very glad* when, I heard that voice of my former teacher, because I at least knew him...

    Second one, even though expected: Buffet.
    Let's just say I came back home very, very, hungry...:rolleyes:
     
    Nachi and axelb like this.

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