Keeping your cool

Discussion in 'Ninjutsu' started by Dunc, Oct 17, 2016.

  1. bassai

    bassai onwards and upwards ! Moderator Supporter

    I know what dunc's referring to , and he's 100% on the money.
     
  2. Dunc

    Dunc Well-Known Member Moderator Supporter

    I don't know if there's any evidence as to the virtue of this, but it seems to me that the top Japanese guys have the same principles applying to everything they do

    Always calm, smiling, unfazed and never controlled by the situation, conversation etc

    I wonder if one practices being calm and unfazed all the time in daily life then you'll fare better in that shocking unfamiliar situation when the last thing you need is a panicked adrenal dump or an angry red mist obscuring your judgement?
     
  3. CrowZer0

    CrowZer0 Assume formlessness.

    I'm someone who is happy/calm/hyper/chill 99% of the time, rarely fazed even at someone shouting in my face hurling abuse and profanity. Not fazed one bit. But there have been and I'm sure there will be occasions the other 1% when I just snap and turn into Hulk mode.

    I just tend to type fast and as I think, usually very "thinking out loud" style. I can see though where sometimes it might come across as ultra aggressive, but I rarely if ever "type angry".
     
  4. CrowZer0

    CrowZer0 Assume formlessness.

    I don't think anticipation really comes into play in the question of adrenaline rushes, they are two different types of responses. Anticipating something and imagining the worst case scenario and playing things over your head is one thing. Being completely unprepared and having an absurd series of actions lead to a point and having to deal with that adrenaline rush can be overwhelming IF you haven't been in similar situations. Comparing the two doesn't make much sense to me.
     
  5. Knee Rider

    Knee Rider Valued Member Supporter

    I'd say the capacity to fly into a violent rage has quite a few benefits in a fight... the ability to remain composed, however, has more and has much more benefit in other areas of self protection as well as life in general.

    I'm sure we've all been guilty of letting certain things under our skins despite best efforts but recent actions would suggest some have taken things much more personally than others. I suppose there are frustrations that remain particular to the context/format though, as not being face to face (or even knowing the face) of your percieved torment could be quite maddening for some, especially if aggression is their primary outlet for frustration. Rising above such things might be difficult for some, but I wouldnt suggest it means they aren't a good martial arts practitioner or are any less of one. Many excellent practitioners aren't exactly paragons of virtue.
     
  6. SWC Sifu Ben

    SWC Sifu Ben I am the law

    Well the old saying is, "One thing shows many."

    But regarding this, it would depend on whether it's a matter of willpower (which has been experimentally show to be fatigable) or whether it's a matter of habituated behaviour.

    To quote Bruce, "Emotion, not anger." Nothing necessarily wrong with using the anger as that emotional fuel but as you said, allowing it to become a part of your process of thought and action is less beneficial than being calm. But one can be both calm and angered. It's like the difference between a cutting torch and a forest fire.
     
  7. Knee Rider

    Knee Rider Valued Member Supporter

    For a minute there I thought you were chellenging me over the internet, so my hand was dangerously close to 'THESE' and this ':rolleyes:' and when those puppies come out, well then you just know things got serious... lucky escape for you! :ban:
     
  8. SWC Sifu Ben

    SWC Sifu Ben I am the law

    Come at me brah. Your emoji and allcaps game is WEAK . I have all the ad hominem.

    :lowblow::fight3::hammer::fight1::woo::woo::woo:


    ;)
     
  9. Knee Rider

    Knee Rider Valued Member Supporter

    I've spend enough time running away from high level creatures on The Witcher 3 to know when I'm bested... and they say video games dont learn you nuffin, ppfft.
     
  10. TwirlinMerlin

    TwirlinMerlin Valued Member

    Definitely helps to know what your triggers are so you can recognise what's happening before you fly off the handle. For me, I have to reign in my caveman brain and literally use my inner voice as a coach to keep myself calm. It has helped me a lot. I would say it works 95% of the time 11/12thsrds of the time every time. Which comes out to - a lot of the time. ;)
     
  11. Aegis

    Aegis River Guardian Admin Supporter

    Just for anyone wondering about this, a brief explanation.

    The Iron Fist was deemed to have been misbehaving in this area of the forum, and as such the mods decided that a short spell away from the forum would be a good idea. As such, a temporary ban was placed on his account. After this took effect, he signed up several new accounts with very insulting and misogynistic handles and used them to make a number of hate-filled reports to the mods. This was deemed to be enough of a provocation for his posting rights to be removed permanently, which he apparently hasn't taken too well.

    In short, had he just manned up and learned to play nicely, he would still be welcome here, but because he instead allowed himself to fly off the handle with some very offensive and hate-filled attacks on some of the hardest-working mods on the site, he's instead not welcome back here ever again.
     
  12. Ero-Sennin

    Ero-Sennin Well-Known Member Supporter

    People are going to start having their Crisco rights taken away. :mad::mad::mad:
     
  13. YouKnowWho

    YouKnowWho Valued Member

    Why do you want to debate online? You state your opinion. Let others to state their opinions. People have right to disagree with you. You have right to ignore them too.

    Quite so often, someone may agree with you 90% and disagree with you 10%. Since you keep arguing about that 10%, both of your blood pressures will raise. It's just not worthy at all.

    The easiest way to avoid online argument are:

    - You express your opinion.
    - If people want you to give more detail, you respond.
    - If people disagree with you, accept it, and move on.
    - Always remember that the sun does not rotate around you.
     
  14. SWC Sifu Ben

    SWC Sifu Ben I am the law

    Is this really the first time this kind of behaviour from a regular poster edit has made someone fly off the handle and get scolded, or banned, or both? I only ask because I haven't actually been here that long and it's the first time I've seen it.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Oct 18, 2016
  15. kevin g

    kevin g Valued Member

    lol, well it has been exciting around here lately, but at least there's been some interesting topics.
     
  16. Rebel Wado

    Rebel Wado Valued Member

    I guess I missed all the excitement :dunno:

    As for keeping cool under pressure, it is all relative to what is important. Folks can get all bent out of shape about things but never lose sight of what is important. Take a mother protecting her children from a threat. Anger may replace fear. So rather than letting fear take over, anger is used as a natural tool to overcome fear.

    On the other hand, a bully might use anger to intimidate others. It could be the same reason, using anger to overcome fear, but the reason isn't to protect anything important in the grand scheme of things. The anger is over something trivial such as a fragile ego.

    Sometimes people get frustrated and lose their cool because they either want to be heard or just feel the situation has gotten out of control. Without knowing more, it is hard to say if what they are upset about is important or not, but it could be very important to the frustrated person who has reached a boiling point.

    The more experience in situations and study, patterns of behavior become clearer. The real bad asses really keep their cool because they have nothing to prove, such things like ego aren't important. But if something does cause them to lose their cool, it is something really scary important and it can be an explosion out of no where.
     
  17. aaradia

    aaradia Choy Li Fut and Yang Tai Chi Chuan Student Moderator Supporter

    I have seen similar behavior of someone melting down like that on another forum. Not exactly, but very similar.


    I would not normally discuss this here, but since Aegis has said a bit, I am going to think that means I can say a bit more than usual.


    To be fair, no one can make another member fly off the handle.No one has that kind of power over another on a forum. It was his doing alone. And it wasn't only the Ninjutsu forum. What is public on these forums are other public warnings from the mod team where he was getting insulting, sniping, and overall not dealing well with being challenged in his opinions in other threads. It was a pattern of behavior. Some people can't handle their opinion being challenged. I think it is a sign of insecurity manifesting itself.

    As for martial arts teaching you to stay calm under duress. It certainly has made me much stronger in that way. For me, the lessons I learn in practicing martial arts carry over into the rest of my life.

    I know some people say MA is only about fighting, but for me, it is about how the discipline of practicing, pushing myself, putting myself under pressure, makes me better in all walks of life.

    Also, my Sifu says that no one type of pressure testing prepares one for everything. So it is good to put oneself under various types of pressure.

    The mental pressure of performing for an exhibition or a tournament- even forms still helps one learn to handle oneself under duress. Of course nothing replaces doing sparring or similar pressure testing. Tests are seen as a way of putting pressure on oneself.

    When I started, performing in a tournament, or even in our tournament prep classes, where we performed for each other in large groups, it freaked me out. I would freeze up- get adrenaline rushes I didn't know how to handle. Nowadays, it doesn't phase me. And that feeling of how to reach inside and stay calm and focus. It carries into many other areas of my life. Of course, it is a journey, I am not perfect, but a LOT better.

    Sorry, if one is so fragile that an Internet debate makes one spaz out so completely as to be abusive, that person was not very strong mentally. On the rare occasion I have gotten annoyed over the Internet. I take a break until I remember it is only an Internet discussion.

    And the thing is, like kicking or hitting skills, one can't make a student practice pushing themselves to be stronger mentally.

    I imagine IF's instructor would be absolutely appalled at his behavior. I also am pretty sure that the research guide he went to in his studies that he cited on MAP would also be appalled at how he behaved.

    I make sure that every post I make is one that hopefully reflects well on my school and my instructors. If my Sifu or instructors logged on here, I believe they would be ok with my posts. Because I love what my school has done for my life. And I would hate to think someone logged on here and would think ill of my school because of how I represent it.

    I know I do tend to think less of some schools or styles when I see a lot of posters in said school or style acting poorly. Also, certain posters also boost my opinion in the same way.

    Maybe it isn't fair, but it does influence me to some degree. Not completely, as I realize it may not be a fair sample, but it does somewhat.

    I take care to represent other areas of my life well too. But as this is a MA forum, so I am focusing on that.

    Others mileage may vary.
     
    Last edited: Oct 18, 2016
  18. John Titchen

    John Titchen Still Learning Supporter

    While sparked by a particular incident, this thread was not created to make personal attacks on other people's posting styles. Please keep it on topic.
     
  19. SWC Sifu Ben

    SWC Sifu Ben I am the law

    Just to show I'm a good sport I'll start it back on topic.

    And to know what other people's are. There are groups who just can't keep their cool on some topics. 2nd amendment people are a good example. It's near impossible to have a differing political or social view on firearms in some of the outdoors/firearms forums I'm on without people getting worked into a froth for you disagreeing with them and their wacked out majority. Some of them you can have a nice dispassionate discussion with on the merits of evidence available and keep it civil even though you disagree on things, and some (most) of them can't stand it and it turns bad pretty fast. But if you want to be able to stay on there you have to shut up about stuff like that in order to be able to have the other discussions because that's groups where people get turfed just for not towing the majority line on thing s like the 2nd amendment, how the Democrats are satanic communists, and other whacked out conspiracy theories. The worst part is its the best place to get gun and gear info, and yet they're so easily riled by one thing an db think their evidence is the only evidence and everything else is a mad conspiracy.
    Paranoia and not being able to keep your cool are an even worse mix.
    I'm amazed big thread on much of the same stayed so rational.
     
    Last edited: Oct 18, 2016
  20. pearsquasher

    pearsquasher Valued Member

    If I find myself up in arms over a topic I often write my reply in notepad to get it out of my system. Then I move off the topic for a while, come back to it, re-read whats happening, peruse, consider, reflect, review.

    Then maybe I'll post.

    Often I don't.

    Because by then I care less.

    It took me about two hours to post this! Kidding

    This is where online conflict is different to face-to-face. You have the time.
     

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