pad holding and workout partner(s)

Okay ... tonight I had class. Actually I did two classes today. I semi-rolled my ankle this afternoon. But I went back to class tonight, after a R.I.C.E treatment, and ibuprofene. I dont have training again until monday, and I taped it heavily for tonight's class. But this really isn't my vent tonight.

I have questions ... concerns and I wanted opinions from other's who have been involed in this longer then I. I know I'm not a perfect pad hold, being inexperienced at it, but I try my best to communicate with my partners, to make sure I'm holding it fine for them. And I still make mistakes and I prolly will for a long time.

I became frustrated tonight with my partner, my partner is a higher belt, and also much younger then me. She attends class with her father, which I think is wonderful. She's a wonderful person. My hard time with tonight, is I feel we had a lack of communication, and I was very frustrated with how she was holding the pad for me. I did talk with Sir after tonight's class, and he made some suggestions, which I will do my best to follow. Mostly to kick where-ever the pad is, whether that means a shallow kick or checking before I exacute what we are practicing. I know I shouldn't have been short, if I was, tonight to a higher belt. I just sometimes have hard times when I become frustrated.

My other concern about tonight is the lack of focus my partner also has tonight. Sir, requires us to move and fast sometimes. Tonight was one of those nights. My partner seemed to lack focus and movements (don't know how to word this). Like he would tell us to switch sides, and I would switch and my partner seemed to be very non-rushed about getting into position. I'm very focused when it comes to training. Senior Sir tells me that alot, when I study under him. I just felt like my partner didn't have the same goals as I did with the training.

So I was just wondering how to further deal with this when I'm partnered with this girl? I want a good atmosphere in the dojo, as well as Sir does, and I don't wanna be frustrated. I honestly do try to communicate with my partners, and I just feel this partner either doesn't wanna communicate (age "might" play a factor here) or well, I don't know, that's why I'm writing.

thanks for everyone's time.

 

Oh man, that sounds familiar ! I was paired with a gal like that for a while (she was also younger, about 15). It was the worst when her boyfriend came to watch or if the instructor (who was her uncle) tried to assist her.

I felt it held me back quite a bit. Since everyone was already paired up with someone about their height before I joined I got "stuck" with this gal. Even though she was a higher rank I tried to be very encouraging and helpful but she just didn't really want to put the effort into it.

She eventually quit (kind of a bittersweet thing...she could have benefitted long term but then again I didn't want to be her partner for the next however many years either !).

As a lower rank it was awkward to be the one to "help" and I think she felt that way too (I also think my age probably intimidated her a little...I'm 29 and don't have a problem with insecurity ). I was never overbearing, unfriendly or impatient with her though (at least not outwardly :Angel: ).

I'm sorry you're in a similar boat. I'm not the best target holder either but I hope others feel that I'm teachable! I don't have any great suggestions; I really don't know how to deal with people like that. I'm a very hyperfocused, motivated person too and have a difficult time understanding why other people aren't (drives my husband mad) .

Hopefully, I'll grow out of it and just learn to accept the way other people are (and in the meantime I'd pray for a different partner ).

Kelly

P.S. Wish I could be more helpful but I CAN relate!

 

or try to encourage her. If she does move quick enough , laugh and say something witty, with the barb of "come on come on, I wanna kick this" ..... and dance a little, like you got ants in your pants. I find that a combination of wit, humour, and a semi hidden instruction makes the partner laugh, but also move along into what you are wanting...

works for me, but then Im good at making people laugh at me

 

That's just the way some people are. And I must admit I deal with it badly which never helps. I remember yelling at a guy because he was chasing a fly around when we was trying to line up and the instructor said nothing. I never stayed with that club for obvious reasons. - I also started a fight with this guy who thought it was funny that he accidentally hit someone during padwork.

Some people are just lazy and some people are just idiots. But you can't really tell her she's in the wrong because she's not in a hurry. The fact is, who's out there working harder? And who's going to get better results?

Keep at it mate, you won't be partnered with her all the time.

 

Thanks so much for letting me vent, and for trying to help the situation. I'm not partnered with her all the time. I try to go to the afternoon classes, as it fits better with my kids school hours. But for some reason I didn't make monday night's class, so I needed to atleast get two classes in, as friday is testing again. So I pulled a double yesterday. The other ladies in the adult classes will help me out if they need me to adjust, or if they like the pad held certain way. They also communicate better, and out of the other ladies I'm the slowest, but I do move as fast as I can so we can do our drills.

I just think the thing that frustrated me after looking at it calmly was just lack of motivation last night. I'm not the fastest one in our class, but I try to give every effort to keep up. I'll just make sure I work on the combo's and the drills without a partner as well. Makes for a nice little cardio workout at home.

 

Sometimes I feel like shouting at people who have been going for over a year and still can't make their rows up!

 

I believe we've all been there at one time or another in our training.

Believe it or not, it could very well be a method in our instructor's madness at pairing us up with certain less motivated training partners.

Pairing up a student with more drive than another sometimes can have an transfer effect on the motivation of the lesser driven student. At other times it just doesn't do a thing 'cept zap the motivation out of the other student. Don't let this happen to you!

All good suggestons so far. Key is communication (and you mentioned that more than once!) with both your partner and your Instructor.

Keep realigning that target to the proper location you wish it to be. When you see that your partner isn't paying attention, snap them out of it. Lack of focus and attention can result in injury ... like missing the target and planting one upside their head (please do not consider doing this :Angel: )

btw... You have followed the correct procedure in ensuring a speedy recovery on that ankle ... hope it is one

 

Holding the target is an art unto itself-different ways/angles for different kicks, etc.

You've touched on the communication issue. Are your target holders stationary or does your instructor want them to move with you or against you? The target holder's should be working on their concentration just as you are working on your kicking technique. It is frustrating working with someone who is not doing their best (or whose best is sub-par), but if you are helping them by giving them direction, maybe they'll eventually "get it."

Good Luck with your training!

Miles

 

Indeed it is, especially when you get partnered with the massive powerful guys I tend to. Me being as tall and skinny as I am, I tend to feel rather sore after a kick where the pad is held directly against the body, not to mention getting practically lifted off my feet when the blow impacts. I almost wish I would get the half-hearted attackers after some of the more greulling lessons. But I guess in the end it's all good for toughening up.

After all, if it doesn't kill you...

 

This may sound strange but I actually like working with guys. I don't mind their stronger kicks, I don't mind it at all. Even if we are short they always team us up with the other women that have shown up. I'm used to working with both genders, this is alittle different.

 

,,, hmm, same here. and I really do prefer being teamed up with a guy rather than a woman. Weird eh??


Yes, totally different

 

Well, I took my turn as the crappy target holding partner last night .

I was holding a shield target for a black tag and she kicked (jump back kick while moving forward...which means I was moving backwards) before I was ready. The target hit me in the face and then her foot slid off the target and hit me in the face...not hard...just enough to shake me a little. I never really got my bearings and she was visibly irritated (I told her several times to wait a second but she either didn't hear me or didn't care).

I'm not fond of holding the shield target because I'm the shortest person older than 12 in my class and the kicks are generally landed in my upper rib/shoulder area (I've been kicked in the face every single time because my stature doesn't allow me to hold it high enough for taller people). The kicks are extremely jarring and I end up with a headache for the rest of class.

I apologized to her and said I know I'm not good at holding the shield target; I explained that I'm a little wary of them because I've ended up with a headache every time I've held for someone. She's 16 and that went over like a lead balloon.

I was supposed to hold a paddle target for her later in class and she took it from me, handed it to someone else and sneeringly said: I wouldn't want you to get a headache .

I asked permission to leave class and was in tears by the time I reached the bathroom (it was the straw that broke the camel's back...the whole day was crummy). Obviously I over-reacted but realizing my own incompetence and having someone throw it in my face was a bit disturbing especially after I apologized for it.

Because I was having such a rotten day I was looking forward to class (it's actually competition class and it's a very intense 2 hour work-out). It's always a pick-me-up. So all things considered everything came crashing down at her snide remark.

I'm going to ask my instructor if I can stick to holding the shield target only for the kids. It's less jarring and will give me experience without frustrating anyone (the kids don't care how you hold it...they're just thrilled when they actually hit it ).

I feel better about the entire situation today but I'm a little discouraged still (it opened a can of worms for me emotionally about my physical limitations; I know they frustrate people).

So, that's my crappy target holding experience and a few extras .

Kelly

P.S. The worst part is I know it sounds like I'm whining and making excuses. Aaaargh!! Communication can be so difficult!

 

Well you left yourself open for that comment. You shouldn't be wary of them -- they are a training tool that you will be using for years if you plan on training for long.

My suggestion pure & simple is learn to hold the target shield and suck it up.

You need to learn how to absorb strikes when sparring ,,, so holding a shield and being 'jarred' as you say is good training for that.

Hate to say it but you need to control your emotions in class. Yeah you did over-react ... now learn from this experience and move on.

You are not incompetent and you can with effort work on your physical weaknesses.

 

i think Kick Chick is showing some tough love

because in my class, nobody would ever make such a comment!! there is just no need for it. im not entirely sure what you did wrong though. but whatever it was, i would have said, do you mind if i ask such and such to hold the pad?

 

Kickchick,

I can take hits in sparring without any problems. I don't generally stand still and let someone kick me hard; at least not if I can help it . I feel that taking hits in sparring is FAR different and it's not a realistic comparison.

No really, I am incompetent; I do not have the experience with the shield to skillfully hold it for someone. It's not a pity-party it's a fact . We don't use them very often and I have only had about four or five opportunities (this was the first time I have ever held the target while moving; I was stationary in previous drills).

The wariness comes from standing there waiting to be hit knowing it's going to hinder the rest of my abilities in class. It has nothing to do with not being willing to try or just needing to buck up. If for some reason I had a "bad back" I wouldn't ignore it, I'd avoid moves that were going to cause pain and disability. It's just common sense. A migraine caused by shock absorbtion is no different than sore joints caused by shock absorbtion. One is just more acceptable. It's not something you get "used to", it's something you prevent...or at least try to .

I did control my emotions in class. I left because I needed the momentary release; I felt much better when I came back . It was a hard day...everyone has them. I meant that my reaction to what happened in class was blown out of proportion (hence my comment about "the straw that broke the camel's back"); my reaction to my entire day was completely appropriate :cry: .

In regards to my "physical weaknesses" I don't feel you have enough information to comment on it...I'll leave it at that. I mean that with all kindness (re-reading it, it sounds like I was being rude) :Angel: .

Thankfully I'm not a person who dwells on things (my husband says my memory isn't long enough ). I have moved on, I just wanted to share that I was on the flip-side of this topic and know how it feels. I shared the extras because it helps to get things off my shoulders .

Cavallin,
My main problem was that I didn't have a good hold on the target and I was not well-positioned when she kicked which caused me to drop the target to the side slightly. I also didn't know how to hold the target and move backwards at the same time (I've never done it before) so I was always too close when she jumped in for the kick. I didn't have enough time between kicks to get a good hold and set-up so it went from bad to worse. Like I said, I tried to get her attention by saying just a minute but she didn't hear or didn't care.

I can understand her frustration but it wasn't what she said so much as how she said it.

Oh and kickchick, I see why you have the perspective you do about the situation and I might have thought/said the same thing as you did in your reply. I'm not upset in the least with anything you've said .

Kelly

 

Sorry to hear about your day Kelly. Sounds like we've both had trouble this week. I think the other day I prolly should have left to the bathroom, to "cool" down. I might actually do that the next time I feel frustrated.

For me it's sometimes ackward holding the pad becuz of the handles on the back. It's the basic one on top going one way, and two going the other way, depending on the drills. I wish it had two, one on the top and one on the bottom for some of the drills we do. Sir, knows we know the kicks so he trys to keep class on an aerobic level. So we hold the pad with the striking area down and the handles up. We then tilt the shield depending on which kick is being thrown. It would help better if there were shields made for this.

I mean I'll learn how to do it at some point, but I want to be a good pad holder for my partner also. I want us both to be safe.

I think they should have pad/shield holding 101, heh.

p.s. my daughter is now a yellow belt, she passed her test friday.

 

LOL, I so agree! A few of us have jokingly brought that up to our instructor .

Exactly! That's how I feel about it too.

Congratulations for your daughter!! That is fantastic!

Kelly

 

You'd expect better behaviour from someone with black in their belt though would you not? I may not know a lot about TKD yet, but I do know one of the tenets is Respect for all students, same thing in the RAF (for which I'm applying), we have the phrase RISE, which helps when remembering the 4 main qualities the air force stands for, Respect, Integrity, Service before self and Excellence. Making snide, sarcastic comments like that to someone is a frankly dispicable thing if you ask me and quite the opposite of what I'd expect out of any TKD student, let alone someone with, what? 3 years of training under their belt (if you'll excuse the pun).

 

OK then I see. You should have mentioned that. We use target shields often in class as part of our training. Target drills (moving & stationary) are an integral part of our curriculum almost as important as sparring. Which is why I couldn't understand your problem. Now I see.

Maybe it is a bit of tough love.... it's just that training for many years I have had to deal with alot of barriers in my training and proving my strengths as a female.

Not sure why you are getting so defensive here. You yourself mentioned you had them and seemed concerned. I only mean't to say that they could be improved with effort.

I suggest you ask your instructor how yuou can become a good feeder (that is, show you the proper technique of holding pads/shields for your partner)

There is an excellant article here on MAP on this written by Mark Coyle
http://www.martialartsplanet.com/magazine/articles/padwork.htm

Maybe she honestly didn't want to give you a headache. She is 16 ... you know how teens are You're an adult, I would have had a word about that comment if it so bothered you ... after class as well as mentioned it to my instructor..... and because you are an adult you should be paired up with adults in class not kids.

Good to hear ....