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  #1  
Old 12-Jan-2005, 12:24 AM
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TheMightyMcClaw TheMightyMcClaw is offline
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Beware: This Joke just might KILL you

A schoolboy attending a presitgious boarding school is found drawing on his desk. The teacher comes up and asks him, "what are you drawing?"
"Black Roses," the boy replies.
The teacher's eyes bulge with revulsion, and she screams "Black Roses!? Black Roses!? Young man, go to the headmaster's office immediately!"
The boy walks out of the classroom, sullen and bewildered. When he reaches his destination, the headmaster asks him "what's the trouble, young man?"
"Well... the teacher sent me to your office for drawing on the desk." The boy replies.
"That's not so bad. What were you drawing?" The headmaster says, showing sympathy for the shaken student.
"Black Roses," the boy answers.
"Black Roses!? I can't believe you'd do such a thing here! You are expelled from this school!" Yells the headmaster.
Speechless, the boy returns to his quarters to gather his posessions. He sets off on the long journey home, broken hearted and wondering what he has done wrong.
When the boy arrives home, his father asks him with wonder, "What's wrong, son? Why are you home early?"
The son replies, "They expelled me from the school for drawing Black Roses on a desk."
The father recoils, aghast. He stammers out "Black... Black Roses!? You are no son of mine! I never want to see you in this house again!" The son, terrified, flees from his home.
Wandering the streets of his hometown with his spirits in tatters, the boy comes across the local constable. The constable, seeing the destrought child, inquires to his plight.
The boy, tears in his eyes, sobbs out "F-First, they expelled me from school ... and - and - now my father has disowned me."
The constable puts his hand on the young man's shoulder, and says "That's terrible! Why would they ever do such a thing?"
"I was... dr-drawing on a desk.... Bl... Black Roses..." he says meekly.
The constable's countenance turns from clay to iron. "Black Roses!? Black Roses!? Come with me, I'm taking you to see a magistrate about this!" The constable grabs the terrified boy, and drags him off to the courthouse.
When they reach the courthouse, the constable roughly slams his charge in a chair before the magistrate. Seeing the sobbing boy, the magistrate asks "What's wrong? Why are you here?"
The young man replies "First they expelled me from school... then my father disowned me.... and now this constable has arrested me! I don't understand it... what's so wrong about drawing Black Roses?"
The magistrate's eye's widen, and his breath grows short. "Black Roses? You were drawing Black Roses!? This community cannot bear such a villain as you! I hereby exile you from this community to live with the beasts in the mountains!"
The magistrate has the constable take the boy outside of the city gates, where they send him off to live in the wild.
His life in shambles, the boy wanders into the mountains. Lost, confused, and hungry, he comes across a group of hermit monks. The hermits, seeing the poor traveller, invite the boy to sit and eat with them. "Come, sir, and share a meal with us. Our food is humble, but 'what we have, we have to share.'" The boy sits down, and meekly thanks the monks for their hospitality.
"Tell us, why is one so young as you wandering these mountains alone?" Asks one of the monks.
The boy, fearful of how the monks will react, tells his story. "First, they expelled me from school... then my father disowned me, and I was arrested and exiled and now..." The boy's speech broke down into stammering sobs as he continued, overwhelmed by emotion.
"What could you have done to deserve such terrible tragedy?" Inquires a monk, his soul moved with pity.
"I was.... drawing... Black Roses..." the boy says quietly, his voice barely a whisper.
"Black Roses!" Screams the monk, his pity turned to abhorration. " We are holy men, cultivating the purity of our spirits. We cannot possibly tolerate the presence of one as wicked as you! Begone!" The monks shoo him off, and the boy runs off into the dark mountains.
On his way, the boy fell off a cliff and died.
The end.
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  #2  
Old 12-Jan-2005, 12:31 AM
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TkdWarrior TkdWarrior is offline
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wat????
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  #3  
Old 12-Jan-2005, 12:43 AM
Ikken Hisatsu Ikken Hisatsu is offline
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this joke has already been done in several other guises.
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  #4  
Old 12-Jan-2005, 05:51 AM
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I don't geddit.
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  #5  
Old 12-Jan-2005, 06:09 AM
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because of this joke we might just kill YOU!

j/k
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  #6  
Old 14-Jan-2005, 01:52 AM
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TheMightyMcClaw TheMightyMcClaw is offline
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Hey, don't say I didn't warn you. This is the single worst joke I've ever heard, so I felt obliged to share it (most people don't tell it quite so dramatically, though). The "Punchline" is that the joke in fact has no punch line, and is just really long and anticlimatic. "Black Roses" can be substituted for anything (I think it was Purple Tigers or somesuch when I first heard it).
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  #7  
Old 14-Jan-2005, 02:41 AM
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semphoon semphoon is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TheMightyMcClaw
The "Punchline" is that the joke in fact has no punch line, and is just really long and anticlimatic.
I know what you mean. I have heard several jokes of this type and they usually make me laugh





...





But not this time....AT ALL
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  #8  
Old 14-Jan-2005, 02:49 AM
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You made me read that whole thing.

I was funny though.
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  #9  
Old 14-Jan-2005, 04:53 AM
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Can I have my 5 minutes back?
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  #10  
Old 14-Jan-2005, 06:23 AM
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I feel..... violated.

You stole 2 minutes of my life.... for nothing.

I could have spent that 2 minutes reading about Kata.

....wait!


*Reads joke again
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  #11  
Old 14-Jan-2005, 08:54 AM
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I find the resulting thread funnier than the initial post....

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sgt_Major
I am who I am, you either accept it, or hate me, I'm not bothered which.
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  #12  
Old 14-Jan-2005, 12:55 PM
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Wax Wax is offline
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You concider that a joke? You need to sit down and have a good watch of some cartoons.
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  #13  
Old 14-Jan-2005, 01:05 PM
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Hey you told it all wrong. The version I know is

A schoolboy attending a presitgious boarding school is found drawing on his desk. The teacher comes up and asks him, "what are you drawing?"
"Black Roses," the boy replies.
"Black Roses!" Screams the teacher his pity turned to abhorration. " We are holy men, cultivating the purity of our spirits. We cannot possibly tolerate the presence of one as wicked as you! Begone!" The monks shoo him off, and the boy runs off into the dark mountains.
On his way, the boy fell off a cliff and died.
The end.

still not funny but nobody'll kill you.
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Last edited by alex_000; 14-Jan-2005 at 01:09 PM.
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  #14  
Old 14-Jan-2005, 02:24 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by YODA
I feel..... violated.

You stole 2 minutes of my life.... for nothing.

I could have spent that 2 minutes reading about Kata.

....wait!


*Reads joke again
[Agrees with SilatPupil]
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  #15  
Old 27-Feb-2005, 07:03 PM
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those kind of things really annoy me
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