So why did I decide to start jiu jitsu? Watching UFC? No.
I'd never heard of the UFC when I started training, and that was a year ago.
After studying judo and traditional ju jitsu, the groundwork side was just too much of a thrill. I didn't even acknowledge that the competitive side of BJJ and MMA existed. It was vaguely there, not something I thought I'd do, after kickboxing didn't really appeal any more.
What's it feel like to be a woman in the art, dominated by the male population, and sometimes in more ways than one?
For a start, the vast majority of them are bigger, stronger, taller, the lot. If you're lucky enough to have another woman in the club, then you're laughing. But unless there's a division at competition for you, most of your time will be sparring men.
As someone who's approaching two and a half years in a modern ju jitsu system with a fair amount of sparring, and a one year white belt in BJJ, I thought I'd offer my experiences and views on my time so far.

Starting off in ju jitsu, I felt like a complete novice in martial arts all over again, despite a few years of experience in other systems. Never have I felt so useless as when I rolled for the first time. The guys were all over me, I could barely even move. I had absolutely no clue what I was doing, and the "macho newbie" I started with made things even worse. It was as if he had to prove something to everyone in the room by beating up someone half his size for at least 5 minutes. But by a lucky stroke, something in my memory triggered and I managed to get a choke on. He never came back.
Although when I continued over the next few months, I never managed such a fluke again, there was something there. A smaller person can use that to get out of tight spaces, and be faster than someone with a larger mass.
Learning more, this has always been part of the fun. As I've improved, it's got more frustrating to the bigger guys, as they often can't keep up.

Starting BJJ a year ago, I found only one other female in the whole club, and I never met her until I went to a seminar. There's noone really in my weight category, so I have to go higher. So began a whole new era of getting squashed.
I've come across several different types of male training partner, I guess they're common to all clubs. As a woman, you may be stared at rather strangely when you walk in for the first time, maybe they're not used to women wanting to roll around on the floor with a load of sweaty men, I don't know. In a class that wasn't my private sessions, my way of dealing with this was when it got to sparring, find the biggest and highest graded male in the class and ask for a roll. Usually works, and if you have some experience, it can also be really good fun. I found it gave me some respect in the club, not afraid to work hard and get beaten. Because as a novice, it happens a LOT. I don't know if other girls get the same problem, but the macho guys who will go hard on you whatever, seem to me to be the reason a lot of smaller people quit. Because it can make you feel useless, and quite often it will make you feel you will never learn anything at all. Like never having a compliant partner during techniques practice.
Then you've got those who don't want to partner you because you're female. I've found in striking arts, they don't want to hit or hurt you. I've not yet found the reason about why they won't roll. Afraid of squashing you perhaps? A way to deal with that? Stay on top and submit them from there!

Another thing you have to be aware of, is the fact you are in a close contact sport. You may well be touched in places you wouldn't want to be. Accidents happen, but groping on purpose needs to be stopped. To the guys out there who are guilty of this, I suggest you stop. I've seen someone leave an MA class because of it. Women are there to train, same as you. You may well get the odd ones who are there to find a cute boyfriend, but it still doesn't mean they're asking for something like this.
But if it is an accident, girls, you're going to have to realise it will happen. If you are uncomfortable, I suggest either doing something else, or wearing a groin and chest guard.

As you improve in techniques and your game, you'll be able to hold your own, even with the bigger guys. My last grading partner in ju jitsu was twice my weight, and a foot taller. I'm quite often in this situation. Get around it by learning how to use the weight you have, and your best assets, your smaller size and speed to defeat your opponents. It may be difficult, but you'll get respect for at least trying. In competition, there's weight classes anyway, so practice against everyone you can. I've now been able to tap the bigger guys, and come close to winning against people with a lot more mass and experience because of playing to my strengths. Learn what you're good at, and use it to your advantage at all times. Then if you meet Mr. Macho, you can do what I did, (hopefully with knowledge and not luck) he can learn his lesson for a change. You can do it!

In closing, everyone has something to teach you, and you'll be in an amazingly fun martial sport. We need a bigger female presence in MMA and BJJ! Let's give the men a run for their money.  

As a grappling martial arts instructor I find teach Judo to females is very difficult. Most females don't like the rolling around you do when doing Judo, BJJ or Submission Wrestling. Great Article by Rhea and a real problem for females doing just about any Martial Art

Kindergarten Sensei
kindergartensensei@gmail.com
www.kindergartensensei.com

Couldn't agree more. Untrained offenders would often leave hand somewhere for grabbers, or get easily on a triangle.

This is a very important point to me and would like to ask for other's opinion on this. I may be completelymisunderstading what MMA is. Self defense is an intrinsic part of my Luta Livre training, which I believed, until now, to be same or very similar to MMA. Luta livre teaches submissions and torsions, which are all very useful to pacify opponents, or to hurt them if needed, but we also trained punches, multiple strikes, rotated and straight kicks, evasion techniques and other training specific to street fighting. I was fortunate enough to have to use this in Rio only twice in my entire life, and both times it worked well , on a thug beating a girl on the streets and 2 guys attempting to steal my car.


So the question is: Do you agree that MMA will not train you to street events? If not, then I still have not found what to train in America.

"I had absolutely no clue what I was doing, and the "macho newbie" I started with made things even worse. It was as if he had to prove something to everyone in the room by beating up someone half his size for at least 5 minutes."

I know exactly what you are talking about, I am a 12 year female martial artist and I have been doing BJJ for 9 years now.

I come in contact with many men that think they need to prove something to the rest of the class that he can not be over powered by a woman, it was very insulting.

The good thing about women in martial arts is that we demand respect, and if we show that we will always get it.

Wonderful article!

Demand? Don't you mean earn?