Dating inside the dojo

Ok i have to ask. now this question can appeal to anyone, all i'm looking for are thoughts.this is dilemma that my friend has just come across it not major but i would like to ask before he makes any moves and it becomes major. If you had someone that you really liked inside the dojo (dojang, gym, place of train or sanctuary etc, what ever you liked to call it.) and your black belt or of teaching status and they're a student. would you go out with them?

would date someone inside your gym?
because i would say ethically no i wouldn't, but what would you do.

 

It's like dating someone from work, it's OK if you can both be grownp-up about it. You never know until it's over though. Stalkers and bunny boilers abound!

 

hahah! very true! very true! If i were an instructor, i would look elsewhere for a lady friend. There's plenty more fish in the sea.

 

I'd hit it.

 

Me too (if I was single)

 

you guys... sheesh.

 

Well, as the instructor shouldn't be able to bestow rank on you, so yeah as long as things are professional go for it. If there's no teacher student issue, I'd say go for it. I met my girlfriend in the dojo - and that was two and a half years ago. She likes to think she can kick my ass.

Remember, you're there to train, not to fraternise. So what's the problem?

 

Ooh Rah Marine. Stick and twist. If I wasn't married of course.:evil:

 

you dirty dirty fools. lol cracking me up.

 

As long as she attends the adult class I'd go for it!

 

i wouldn't advise dating someone in your dojo. my best friend date a girl at his school, it last about 1 1/2 years and broke up. it was extremely akward stituation. and she eventually dropped out. make sure you know what the risk are.

 

Experience has taught me that it is almost always a bad idea for instructors to date students. It might work, IF, as Martial Dad said, everyone's grown up about it, but the potential downside is generally greater (and more likely) than the potential upside.

Students dating each other is less problematic, but I've seen messy fallout from that too.

However, we're talking about primal human impulses here (sex and fighting), so it's going to happen.

 

thanks everyone for your replies. obviously the teacher is not that high and is quite young (17 and is only 1st dan), but like you were saying it could proberbly get quite awkward. and thats not all as well, as a sensei or sempai (teacher or senior) i would feel that their is certain standards (ethically) to uphold.
of course if everybodies cool with it then fine, but i can see where could lead and could lead quite bad circumstances.
I mean this girl which my friend quite likes is only a beginner her mum is the same grade as my friend. wouldn't that be just weird. i suppose what is come down to is, how much do you value you status as a black belt.

 

LOL, so if it goes badly he may get an ass whooping from her mum? haha

 

Jump in before him and nail her & her Mum:evil:

edit: Just remembered I have a 17 year old daughter:bang:
Tell your friend to treat her with respect and admiration and remember no sex before marriage!

 

Bwahahahahaha! Nominated for MAP 2008 Awards "Best post"!:Anth:

 

what if the girl is a black belt and her dad is an instructor

 

If there is mutual attraction, it would be unethical to allow ethics to prevent what may be a great thing from happening.

 

I met my wife in the dojang. Although I've suffered food poisoning shortly after any time I say to her, "In the dojang I'm your instructor, not your husband..."

 

i suppose it wouldn't be as bad as i make out. i thinks its the risk if it doesn't work out, then it could ruin someone's training because its so awkward.