MAP Launches Dating Section! (April Fools)

[Saz]

I'm delighted to announce the launch of our latest MAP section, MAP Dating.

Here at MAP we understand how hectic the life of a dedicated martial artist can be. Balancing a rigourous training schedule with a social life, career and the drive to suceed at Martial Arts can often leave you neglecting your search for that special someone.

At MAP we say "no more shall you go unloved". We've launched MAP Dating to help the busy, the socially inept and the romantically challenged matrial artist find a date, no matter what you're looking for. Wether you want to find the man who understands you, or the girl who does that thing your last girlfriend refused to do (and more), MAP dating is for you!

To celebrate the launch of MAP Dating, we are running a competition where you, yes YOU, can win a date with a MAP Admin*. You have to be in it to win it, so register now to be automatically entered.

You can find MAP Dating by clicking the link in the Navbar, or going here http://www.martialartsplanet.com/forums/dating/

:love:
Saz

[Alansmurf]

Saz are you becoming despersate and trying to get a date online ??? :Angel:

[Victoria]

I keep hitting 'calendar' now instead of 'new posts'!!

[CosmicFish]

Chimp's a little older than I thought he would be.

[Ghost Frog]

Roflmao!!

[aikiwolfie]

Saz I'll take you out. Just don't tell anybody ok ;) :p

[Gary]

http://www.martialartsplanet.com/forums/dating/index.php?page=showstory&storyid=1

Probably the second funniest thing I've seen all week! :D

[karate princess]

Lol, I thought this was a joke at first.... hmmm.... could be intresting.

[FONB]

I am laughing while write this!

What's next martial arts couples swap(swinger)! :eek: :D
Also, thought that this was just one person playing all the other people on the forum! What do i know! :D

[KickChick]

ROFLMAO

[Verx]

Lmao

[cavallin]

thanks for the april fool's saz!!

[Sever]

Little do you guys realise that the admin being pimped out for this isn't Saz, it's Aegis! :D

[RunningDog]

Fantastic idea guys, maybe I can finally feel what love is like with a beautiful high kicking chick. Or just a high kicking chick.

On a side note, I won the lottery last night and I'm moving to Monaco, if anyone wants to visit me there.

[Hiroji]

This is it. I knew it.

I always knew me finding MAP that day back in 2004 was fate. It happened for a reason. And now i know.

Im going to join the MAP dating sevice. Then, im going to meet the woman of my dreams. Its all starting to make sense now. Things do happen for a reason. oh boy.

[tom pain]

Signed up :p

:love:

[Sam]

Yeah me too, however I decided it was time to come clean and admit to you all who I really I am.

Im sorry I have deceived you all for so long.

[Pacificshore]

Then, im going to meet the woman of my dreams.
Are you kidding?? I've already met the Women of my Dreams, maybe even Nightmares here :p :love:

[Hiroji]

Are you kidding?? I've already met the Women of my Dreams, maybe even Nightmares here :p :love:
i just have a feeling Pac.

This is a gift from god. It was planned. Today my life has taken a turn for the better. Today...my life begins. Things do happen for a reason. MAP dating has happened for a reason. Im going to fall deep in love and meet the woman of my dreams and she will love me too.

[Pacificshore]

Yes, yes.....he came to me as I sat in the Pub and told me to join MAP for this was going to happen too :D

I just jumped the Gun so to speak :p

[cheesypeas]

It is All Fools Day alright...

first weird pms from those who shall remain anonymous... :p

nw this.... :D

[Sam]

I'm not joining to meet my love match, I just want a hot date with an admin :love:

[tom pain]

I'm not joining to meet my love match, I just want a hot date with an admin :love:

Same here.

Now where is Aegis? :D

[Hiroji]

Yes, yes.....he came to me as I sat in the Pub and told me to join MAP for this was going to happen too :D

I just jumped the Gun so to speak :p
hehe :D

Well, you never know i guess!! ;) :D

[Hiroji]

oooohhhh i hope kickchick joins!


MILF!!! :love: :o :D

[Aegis]

Right here. Check out my profile too: http://www.martialartsplanet.com/testvb/dating/showprofile.php?id=104

[Terao]

wow abit shorter than how I imagened you aegis. No point of me signing up for 2 reasons, A. im 14 = no one of my age on here B. the girl i fancy asked me out yesterday so woopppppp for me because she is hot. :D :D :D *dreams* :rolleyes: :love:

[Su lin]

OMG!!!!!

I spend the afternoon at work and return home to find the world has gone mad!!! :eek: :love:


I registered of course. :o :p

[Su lin]

Anyone checked out their matches yet?

http://www.martialartsplanet.com/testvb/dating/mymatches.php


:eek: :eek: :cry: :cry: :p

[CKinnerley]

Phew, and I thought I wasn't going to see a single joke today. MAP FTW.

Also, acronyms FTW.

[Victoria]

Wow, 17 members already! :eek:

[aikiwolfie]

:eek: I match with Su Lin :eek:

I'm not really that sad it's just a glitch in the system. Saz assures me she's working on it :p

[wrydolphin]

You know whats really scary?

You're my only match, wolfie. I think you rigged it!

[aikiwolfie]

I am :o Um ... does that mean you'll let me come to visit you in Texas :D :D :D :D :D :D I'll be good I promises and I'm toilet trained :Angel:

[wrydolphin]

How good are you at cooking, cleaning and walking dogs, wolfie?

[aikiwolfie]

Shouldn't I walk the dogs then clean them before cooking them? Chared-grilled poodles don't fetch a stick too well :yeleyes: :p

But yes I can cook, clean and walk dogs :rolleyes:

[wrydolphin]

Score!

You can be my houseboy! :p

That will leave me free to go out on more dates. ;)

[Su lin]

If he does you Mon- Weds please can I have him THurs-Sun as he;s my only match! :eek: :p

You get to make my toast at work Aiki!:D

[Terao]

lol your one of my matches too. lol does that mean i can come over aswell lol and be that teenage who came to see you lol :D

[Su lin]

lol your one of my matches too. lol does that mean i can come over aswell lol and be that teenage who came to see you lol :D


:eek: Erm......think I may get arrested Rukku!

[wrydolphin]

Su, I bet we could pimp wolfie out for is cooking and cleaning services! Hurrah! No need to worry about money while in school again!

[Su lin]

Su, I bet we could pimp wolfie out for is cooking and cleaning services! Hurrah! No need to worry about money while in school again!


W00t! I'll be able to pay off my student loan at last! :love:

As long as we get to use his services ourselves occasionally ;) What about Chimp, reckon we could pimp him out too? Not sure how pretty he would look in a frilly apron though. :eek: :p

[Terao]

:eek: Erm......think I may get arrested Rukku!

why what are you thinking I was just talking about visiting and maybe training :eek:

[aikiwolfie]

Su was obviously thinking you're a teenager and thus must require house training. But most people frown on locking teenagers up in cages. Even though it's the best place for them. :Angel:

Now about pimping me out. I require a lot of loving attention after a hard days work. I particularly like to have my tummy rubbed :D

[Victoria]

I haven't got any matches :cry: :D

[aikiwolfie]

Poor Victoria :( Adjust the age setting to the minimum and maximum legal age. Broaden the search a bit. If that doesn't work I'll take you out on a sympathy date ;)

[Su lin]

Awww poor V! Perhaps you just need to become a little less picky like Wry and myself! We may lend you Aiki for a free trial if you like :p

I would look after you after your days work too Aiki! ;) :p

[Chimpcheng]

w00000000000t, let's the the s'loving going on. Hot monkey love. :love: :love:

[Victoria]

My age is on 16-90 :eek: :eek:

[aikiwolfie]

:o um ... wry I need help here ... wry :confused: :o

[Su lin]

Well,perhaps your 14 yr old or 91yr old lover is out there waiting for you V! :D
Isn't Chimp 90 though? :eek:

[aikiwolfie]

My age is on 16-90 :eek: :eek:Set the location to "Anywhere" ;)

[Su lin]

Perhaps it's because you are a "couple" V? :confused:

[saru1968]

he;s my only match! :eek: :p
!


Nope, you popped up on mine as a match as well!

[Su lin]

Nope, you popped up on mine as a match as well!


Is that since I changed my profile to 6'7,bald and 400kg??? :eek: :p

[aikiwolfie]

LMAO!!! :p

[Victoria]

Set the location to "Anywhere" ;)
It is :D


But Su is right, it probably doesn't help that I'm set as a couple. Didn't want to lie about the other voice in my head :)

[aikiwolfie]

So you're open minded about age and location and still can't get a match? That is so sad. Call me and we'll talk about that sympathy date :p

[saru1968]

Is that since I changed my profile to 6'7,bald and 400kg??? :eek: :p

nah..was the hairy back..:eek:

[Victoria]

So you're open minded about age and location and still can't get a match? That is so sad. Call me and we'll talk about that sympathy date :p
Oh yes :love:

[Su lin]

It is :D


But Su is right, it probably doesn't help that I'm set as a couple. Didn't want to lie about the other voice in my head :)


Lol,well I did see that but didnt want to go being nosey! :p

[Saz]

Its nice to see happy customers.

Check out this testimonial from one of our first members to find love, Chimpcheng http://www.martialartsplanet.com/testvb/dating/index.php?page=showstory&storyid=7

:love:

[g-bells]

This is it. I knew it.

I always knew me finding MAP that day back in 2004 was fate. It happened for a reason. And now i know.

Im going to join the MAP dating sevice. Then, im going to meet the woman of my dreams. Its all starting to make sense now. Things do happen for a reason. oh boy.

H.......i'll be your huckleberry ;)

[Victoria]

:D :D :D

[g-bells]

your tp V :love:

[aikiwolfie]

Its nice to see happy customers.

Check out this testimonial from one of our first members to find love, Chimpcheng http://www.martialartsplanet.com/testvb/dating/index.php?page=showstory&storyid=7

:love:LMAO!!!

[Lily]

Oi Chimp!!!!!! :woo:

I really can't tell if that site is serious :cry:

[NaughtyKnight]

hahaha! nice april fools Saz.

Win a date with you? Give us something we'd want :p.

[Lily]

I just joined, I'm looking for a couple (can I get Aegis AND Saz?)

[hawkfish]

That's just too funny. :D

[NaughtyKnight]

I just joined, I'm looking for a couple (can I get Aegis AND Saz?)

We should definatly film that. Then we could have a MAP members Porno thread. Now THAT is cooking with gas. :cool:

[Lily]

NK - are you volunteering to be the cameraman?

The number of lies people tell on that site is scary.

[NaughtyKnight]

Aii, i'll be the camera man. We'll until my tash grows through. Then "im here to clean zeeee pool" ;).

[NaughtyKnight]

Wow, this dating site is great! I got the clap 4 times after joining!

*hands saz some penicillin* sorry babe :o







:D

[Lily]

Nasty :p

I encourage all MAP members to join the site, love could be just around the corner for you.

[wrydolphin]

Lies!

I'll have you know every word it true! Especially the 350lbs part, Rawr! :p

[tkdgirl01]

Maybe this was asked already, but I'll ask anyways... What happens if the admin is located in another country, or part of? I don't know about anyone else, but I'm not shelling out the money for a plane ticket, plus a place to stay... On my wage? HAH! Great idea, though...

[wrydolphin]

We were planing to use the proceeds from the advertising for that, sillykicker.

[tkdgirl01]

Cool! Should be fun!

[NaughtyKnight]

Lmao...

[Lily]

I can't get my pic up on that site!

[aikiwolfie]

There's an ugly filter Lily ;)
hahaha! nice april fools Saz.

Win a date with you? Give us something we'd want :p.
I'd take Saz out. I hear she's really entertaining when she's drunk and throws a decent punch in a fight ... and a pint glass and a stool and a bottle and pretty much anything else that comes to hand ;) :p

[Lily]

[QUOTE=aikiwolfie]There's an ugly filter Lily ;) Hahahahahah :D No wonder none of us can get pics up ;)

[Pacificshore]

I can't get my pic up on that site!
Try washing your computer and key board :D

[Rhea]

Or could be just cause it was/is a massive wind up?
;)

Maybe I should join, or maybe I'm saying that as my other half is looking over my shoulder ready to hit me...

[Sam]

Or could be just cause it was/is a massive wind up?
;)

Maybe I should join, or maybe I'm saying that as my other half is looking over my shoulder ready to hit me...

Its a wind up? :cry: .

Damn and I thought my chance to find happiness was finally just around the corner. I mean who wouldn't want an overweight, bald, gender confused female/male with a tattoo on her bum :confused:

[Pacificshore]

Its a wind up? :cry: .

Damn and I thought my chance to find happiness was finally just around the corner.
Don;t you live right around the corner from the zoo.....home of Chimp?? :p

[Sam]

Don;t you live right around the corner from the zoo.....home of Chimp?? :p

Further away thankfully.

[Pacificshore]

Thank god no monkey poo then :p

[Chimpcheng]

Oi Chimp!!!!!! :woo:

I don't know what you mean Lillian errr I mean Lilo. :confused:

Also OI SAM less of that or no date for you!!! :woo: :D

[Lily]

Chimp, the 20 minutes time lapse from arrival from bed is so NOT me. We're looking at 2 minutes :P

[Sam]

I don't know what you mean Lillian errr I mean Lilo. :confused:

Also OI SAM less of that or no date for you!!! :woo: :D

I dont see the problem here...... :love:

[Chimpcheng]

Chimp, the 20 minutes time lapse from arrival from bed is so NOT me. We're looking at 2 minutes :P

Well I didn't want you to lose face in front of our fellow MAPers, so I decided to increase it by a factor of 10. ;)

And Oi Sam!!! :woo:

[Hiroji]

H.......i'll be your huckleberry ;)
Aww are you on there yet?...ill send you a msg :o :love:

Im willing to travel ;)

[Fishbone.]

This is April fools.. Right?

[Victoria]

Hey wolfie, do I still get the sympathy date? ;) :D

[2E0WHN]

If it is a April fool, then Su Lin is in for a shock :eek: :D :rolleyes:

[Su lin]

Pfft! Aiki was claiming its an April fools too,but he's just scared because he was my only match! :eek: :p

[2E0WHN]

Funny? I got a match off of you. Strange is that.

[Su lin]

I know,more people seem to have me as a match than I do them. :confused: Perhaps I just need to be less fussy! :p

[Moony]

I know,more people seem to have me as a match than I do them. :confused: Perhaps I just need to be less fussy! :p

16-90 is a good age range....you've got the legal ones to those that are rich and on their last legs ;)

[Fishbone.]

As we know i'm very selective of my women :cool:

[Su lin]

[QUOTE=Moony]16-90 is a good age range....you've got the legal ones to those that are rich and on their last legs ;)[/QUO

There isnt an option to filter out those who may be old but poor on there though! :eek: :p

[Victoria]

After I changed mine from 'couple' to 'female' I got matched with practically everyone :eek:
Think I'll change it back to 'couple' :D

[2E0WHN]

I know,more people seem to have me as a match than I do them. :confused: Perhaps I just need to be less fussy! :p

You fussy? Never.... lol

[Su lin]

Immo,how could you!!! :eek: :eek: :eek:


True though ;)

[Moony]

16-90 is a good age range....you've got the legal ones to those that are rich and on their last legs ;)

There isnt an option to filter out those who may be old but poor on there though! :eek: :p

I know, that's where the background check comes in....i doubt that chimps is that age though....i recon he's got a thing for old ladies!

[Chimpcheng]

I know, that's where the background check comes in....i doubt that chimps is that age though....i recon he's got a thing for old ladies!

You said it yourself Mooners, rich and on their last legs, just like Lex Luthor in "Superman Returns" with that old wife what signed over her wealth and then carcked it so Lexy boy could get a boat and stuff...

OMG what is wrong with my syntax today?

Fail English? That's unpossible!

[Moony]

You said it yourself Mooners, rich and on their last legs, just like Lex Luthor in "Superman Returns" with that old wife what signed over her wealth and then carcked it so Lexy boy could get a boat and stuff...

OMG what is wrong with my syntax today?

Fail English? That's unpossible!

At least i'm not faking my age

[aikiwolfie]

Hey wolfie, do I still get the sympathy date? ;) :DLOL! Sure :cool: You're legal ... right :confused: Leave the other half at home though. I tend to be somewhat territorial. :yeleyes: :eek: You could bring Su and make it a double date :D

[g-bells]

Aww are you on there yet?...ill send you a msg :o :love:

Im willing to travel ;)

no on there yet.... just teasing you a little

how far are you willing to travel??????

[Victoria]

LOL! Sure :cool: You're legal ... right :confused: Leave the other half at home though. I tend to be somewhat territorial. :yeleyes: :eek:
Of course I'm legal, and I come with papers :D And no other half unless you count the voices... :yeleyes:
You could bring Su and make it a double date :D
Careful you'll make chimp all jealous :D

[aikiwolfie]

PFFFFFFFFFFTTTT!!!! I'm not skeered of no flea bitten ape :p We'll just hand it over to Saz for sanitisation. Or Lily for toture practice. :)

So you come with papers? Russian mail order or pedigree?

[Kwajman]

I was thinking papers as in, paper training a puppy. :D

[Hiroji]

no on there yet.... just teasing you a little

how far are you willing to travel??????
Im willing to travel the world over to be in your arms baby ;) :love: ;)


:D

[Victoria]

PFFFFFFFFFFTTTT!!!! I'm not skeered of no flea bitten ape :p We'll just hand it over to Saz for sanitisation. Or Lily for toture practice. :)

So you come with papers? Russian mail order or pedigree?
He wouldn't complain either way! :D


Pure Welsh pedigree deary ;)

[aikiwolfie]

:yeleyes: kewlies :love: ;)

[g-bells]

Im willing to travel the world over to be in your arms baby ;) :love: ;)


:D

why H you had me at hello........you had me at hello :cry:

[Chimpcheng]

Careful you'll make chimp all jealous :D

PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT!!!

Anyway, when are we meeting Wonky? Get that hotel booked... ;)

[Victoria]

Anyway, when are we meeting Wonky? Get that hotel booked... ;)
Hahahahaaaaa. When hell freezes over Nobby.


:D

[Lily]

I deleted my profile on that site, I thought it was a joke?

[Pacificshore]

I deleted my profile on that site, I thought it was a joke?
Aww now it just not the same anymore :eek: :cool:

[Chimpcheng]

Hahahahaaaaa. When hell freezes over Nobby.

So, sumnmer then? :D

[Su lin]

This thread is scaring me now!

My map dating profile is ALL true btw! :)

[Pacificshore]

This thread is scaring me now!

My map dating profile is ALL true btw! :)
As true as the Panda in you :love:

[Chimpcheng]

I deleted my profile on that site, I thought it was a joke?

That's probably for the best Lillian, don't want you pinching more kidneys do we? :D

[Lily]

Su Lin, you have a boyfriend! :D

[Lily]

That's probably for the best Lillian, don't want you pinching more kidneys do we? :D

I have pinched a kidney, 2 non-matching ears, 3 toes (well 2 toes plus one thing that looks like a toe)....I need to complete the set Chimp!

[Su lin]

Su Lin, you have a boyfriend! :D

Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh


Yes and I met him on MAP dating! :p










(That may or may not be a lie)

[Chimpcheng]

I have pinched a kidney, 2 non-matching ears, 3 toes (well 2 toes plus one thing that looks like a toe)....I need to complete the set Chimp!

The set? Making a new boyfriend Lilo? :confused: If you're that lonely just give me a call and wire me money for a return first class ticket with 14 days in a 5 star hotel and AU$1000 spending money per week. :)

[Pacificshore]

OMG!!! Lily's trying to create her look-a-like :eek: :p

[Lily]

The set? Making a new boyfriend Lilo? :confused: If you're that lonely just give me a call and wire me money for a return first class ticket with 14 days in a 5 star hotel and AU$1000 spending money per week. :)

Pimp yourself somewhere else Chimp :D I've had my way with you and don't care for seconds :P

[Chimpcheng]

Pimp yourself somewhere else Chimp :D I've had my way with you and don't care for seconds :P

Woah there, I was on a plane for 24 hours with no sleep. Jeebers, I'm not a machine Lillian!!! :woo: :D

[Lily]

Woah there, I was on a plane for 24 hours with no sleep. Jeebers, I'm not a machine Lillian!!! :woo: :D

Wait chimp, don't go :D I am the official MAP fluffer, I can fix your problem :eek:

[Chimpcheng]

Wait chimp, don't go :D I am the official MAP fluffer, I can fix your problem :eek:

SHOCKING!!!

:Angel:

[Terao]

Indeed,but still obvious. :D

[Victoria]

What's a fluffer?? :confused:

[saru1968]

What's a fluffer?? :confused:


:D

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fluffing

A fluffer is a hired member of the crew of a pornographic movie (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pornographic_movie) whose role on the set is to sexually arouse the male participants prior to the filming of scenes requiring erections

[Su lin]

See I was just about to say "I dont know what a fluffer is but knowing Lily and Chimp I imagine it will be something rude/porn related"!

How right I was! :p

[Terao]

you mean lily might be... SHEMALE! :eek:

[Victoria]

Trust you Gaz :D

An interesting bit of information. Thank you!


Lily wtf....nevermind :rolleyes:

[Terao]

Lily wtf....nevermind :rolleyes:


what did you expect it's Lily :D

[2E0WHN]

what did you expect it's Lily :D

Well it is better than being sexually aroused by lamposts.

[Terao]

Yeh I know will we really need to get you to a shrink :D

[2E0WHN]

Now why would you want to reduce me? I know I need to lose weight, but through evaporation? Please. :eek:

:D

[Terao]

we'll just leave you out in the rain most likley cheaper. :D

[Victoria]

:rolleyes:

[2E0WHN]

we'll just leave you out in the rain most likley cheaper. :D

I am not a sponge Luke. And if I was, I would cause a water shortage anyways. :p :D

[Terao]

I would cause a water shortage anyways. :p :D

So now we know whos responsible for the draught in the south. :eek:

[2E0WHN]

Yeah well... Someone needs the blame. :D

[Terao]

Might aswell be you, it always is anyway :D

[inokichi]

19 Male members and 10 Female...I'm disappointed! Where are all the babes I was promised?! And why won't anyone view my profile? :cry:

[Su lin]

I just viewed your profile Ino! :D

We share the same favourite film by the way. :)

[inokichi]

Oh thank you :D Upon reflection, using a picture of Skeletor for my picture probably hasn't helped my cause. :p

[Su lin]

I just added a picture to my dating profile too, my word I look H-O-T! :love:

Who is Friendlyjudoguy? Apparently he is now a match too! Again must be my lovely lovely profile! :p

[inokichi]

I guarantee that if you use Shrukin's photoshop of your portrait (from the babes thread) FriendlyJudoGuy will be a lot friendlier :p

[Su lin]

Lol! No,honestly,my MAP dating one is HOT! :p

[narcsarge]

You all have fun in the "dating" section. Su Lin, behave yourself in there! Remember, you have a reputation to uphold! :D

[inokichi]

Smokin' hot, Su. You should've posted that pic in the Babes thread instead :D

[aikiwolfie]

I'll hold your reputation while you go have fun Su :D

[Su lin]

Lolol of course Narc! :p

And thanks H, thought you might like it. ;)

[aikiwolfie]

:eek: Su Lin is Grotbags!!! :eek:

[g-bells]

You all have fun in the "dating" section. Su Lin, behave yourself in there! Remember, you have a reputation to uphold! :D

thats what shes doing narc :D

pandas get around

[Terao]

Check out the hot stud on my profile pick hehe.

[Su lin]

:eek: Su Lin is Grotbags!!! :eek:


:eek: Yes I am :D

I actually went to a fancy dress party as her once,but couldnt get the green makeup off or the green hair dye out for ages afterwards! :p

[narcsarge]

thats what shes doing narc :D

pandas get around

Yeah G, we just have to be ready to pull her fur out of it when she gets a bit, too in to it!

[g-bells]

Yeah G, we just have to be ready to pull her fur out of it when she gets a bit, too in to it!
but she likes it rough, aa little fur pulling only edges her on

[narcsarge]

but she likes it rough, aa little fur pulling only edges her on


DOH! :bang:

[CKinnerley]

Every time I see one of those sign up forms, Username, Password, Confirm Password etc, I just can't resists filling 'em in for some reason.

[aikiwolfie]

:eek: Yes I am :D

I actually went to a fancy dress party as her once,but couldnt get the green makeup off or the green hair dye out for ages afterwards! :pWell work a spell and magic me down to Welshie land :yeleyes: :p

[FONB]

This is where the Benny Hill chase song comes in!
DadaDada ....
i think you can all hear it now the hornyUK or European people just want sex with use hot american. I think that is why they have Benny Hill on here in the states so much. :D :rolleyes: :eek: It feels so good. :D

[tkdgirl01]

This is where the Benny Hill chase song comes in!
DadaDada ....
i think you can all hear it now the hornyUK or European people just want sex with use hot american. I think that is why they have Benny Hill on here in the states so much. :D :rolleyes: :eek: It feels so good. :D


That show is hilarious! I've only seen it recently aired on BBC- America, but it used to be on some other channel.

[g-bells]

That show is hilarious! I've only seen it recently aired on BBC- America, but it used to be on some other channel.

the best one was when benny faught a kung fu bear

[armanox]

Let's see here....I matched Skc_wado.

[Su lin]

Well work a spell and magic me down to Welshie land :yeleyes: :p


I'm not a Welshie!!!! :eek:

[fruitjuice!]

I'm delighted to announce the launch of our latest MAP section, MAP Dating.

Here at MAP we understand how hectic the life of a dedicated martial artist can be. Balancing a rigourous training schedule with a social life, career and the drive to suceed at Martial Arts..


Yeah, whatever. So where are the chicks?

[2E0WHN]

Yeah, whatever. So where are the chicks?

In with the chickens. It is spring you know. :D

[Sam]

Let's see here....I matched Skc_wado.

You lucky, lucky thing. :p

I matched about 12 people, Im not fussy me :rolleyes:

[Victoria]

I'm not a Welshie!!!! :eek:
Me and Saz are!! :eek: :love:

[Chimpcheng]

You lucky, lucky thing. :p

I matched about 12 people, Im not fussy me :rolleyes:

I only match 5, including you Sam Sam... ;)

[Victoria]

I only match 5, including you Sam Sam... ;)
But you're a baller Nobby, you should match the whole site surely? ;) :D

[Chimpcheng]

But you're a baller Nobby, you should match the whole site surely? ;) :D

That does it Wonky, I'm going to adjust my profile so that you aren't a match. :woo: :p

[Sam]

I only match 5, including you Sam Sam... ;)

Stop looking at me, its freaking me out, anyway you dont match me so maybe I do have standards after all :love:

[Chimpcheng]

Stop looking at me, its freaking me out, anyway you dont match me so maybe I do have standards after all :love:

That does it, you're off my xmas list! :woo: Speaking of which, can I have my xmas pressies please? :D

[Sam]

That does it, you're off my xmas list! :woo: Speaking of which, can I have my xmas pressies please? :D

Most certainly I might get round to posting them sometime near your birthday.

[Su lin]

Hmmmm I now have 2 matches, being fussy and all. ;) :p

[Chimpcheng]

Most certainly I might get round to posting them sometime near your birthday.

Can I also have a birthday present please? :D

[Sam]

Can I also have a birthday present please? :D

Yeah you'll receive it around about christmas.

[NaughtyKnight]

Whos going to be the first one getting laid from this thing?

MAP award for the first! My nearest one is Lily, so I'll give this award a miss... :p

[Pacificshore]

That does it, you're off my xmas list! :woo: Speaking of which, can I have my xmas pressies please? :D
You're still waiting too :eek: :p

[Sam]

You're still waiting too :eek: :p

:o

Don't hate me I'm just very disorganized, theyre all wrapped and ready to go.

[Chimpcheng]

You're still waiting too :eek: :p

She's such a lazy gump! :woo: :D

[Pacificshore]

:o

Don't hate me I'm just very disorganized, theyre all wrapped and ready to go.
I can never hate you Sammi :love: Chimp on the other hand...well I should have sent him that post card of the nude Ozzy men he wanted :D

[Su lin]

I have the grand total of 2 matches now.Wonder if its my green hair,warts and wide girth that is putting people off,along with my really loud shouty voice and a tendency to throw people in my cauldron? :cry:

[Sam]

I can never hate you Sammi :love: Chimp on the other hand...well I should have sent him that post card of the nude Ozzy men he wanted :D

Well that answers some lingering questions.....

[Pacificshore]

Well that answers some lingering questions.....
You knew the answer all along...you just needed confirmation :eek:

[Ular Sawa]

I have the grand total of 2 matches now.Wonder if its my green hair,warts and wide girth that is putting people off,along with my really loud shouty voice and a tendency to throw people in my cauldron? :cry:

Either that or it's cuz you're a Leo.... :D .......

[Su lin]

But Leos are just the greatest star sign! Apparently we like being show offs and at the centre of attention :eek: That is SO unlike me! :p

[Chimpcheng]

Well that answers some lingering questions.....

Is this about me not wanting to get jiggy with you after all those phone calls, text messages, PMs, emails, letters, smoke signals, passenger pigeons and pony express mail begging me to get it on with you?

Now now Samwise, you know I love you and we'll work better as friends, now be a good girl and give me your friend Sammy's phone number please. :D

[Ular Sawa]

But Leos are just the greatest star sign! Apparently we like being show offs and at the centre of attention :eek: That is SO unlike me! :p

Yep, it must be the green hair & warts thing then....... :D

[Sandus]

Anybody notice that MAP dating is just like a real dating site? 90% men :D

[Aegis]

Anybody notice that MAP dating is just like a real dating site? 90% men :D
Either means that there are more single guys on MAP or that more guys on MAP don't know that this is a joke ;)

[aikiwolfie]

Me and Saz are!! :eek: :love:Hmm taking Saz and victoria out on a date at the same time. Could be an interesting adventure :p

Never thought for a second you were a welshie Su ;)

[aikiwolfie]

Either means that there are more single guys on MAP or that more guys on MAP don't know that this is a joke ;)You mean I'm not getting my date with you Aegis :confused: I was so looking forward to having my tummy rubbed :p

Saz promised me I'd win 'cause I was her favourite :cry: :cry: :cry:

Su I need huggles from a big comfy panda :p <---heart broken :(

[g-bells]

the dating thing is'nt real?????? :cry:

[tom pain]

Hmm taking Saz and victoria out on a date at the same time. Could be an interesting adventure :p

Good plan - mini MAP-meet Cardiff? :love:

Never thought for a second you were a welshie Su ;)

Yeah, shes not elite enough ;)

[Hiroji]

the dating thing is'nt real?????? :cry:


Looks like we'll have to go private G... :rolleyes:

[g-bells]

Looks like we'll have to go private G... :rolleyes:

Pfffftttttt you hurt me H :cry:

[Hiroji]

Pfffftttttt you hurt me H :cry:
Please forgive me G? :o

[g-bells]

more like this H

[Hiroji]

Anything for you mate. ;)

We can fit the tent in the back?

[g-bells]

Anything for you mate. ;)

We can fit the tent in the back?

i'm not that easy H
you need to wine and dine me to get back into my good graces :cool:

[Victoria]

Good plan - mini MAP-meet Cardiff? :love:
Already being thought about Tom ;)


It would be lovely to have you down here wolfie. A night out with me and Saz and you'll never be the same again :yeleyes: :love:

[aikiwolfie]

No. I'll most likely be traumatised and permanently mentally scarred. But I'm game ;)

[Alansmurf]

OK just to help you youngsters along you can match yourselves up by star sign too using this litle guide ...

Smurf

Below
are true
descriptions of zodiac signs, with traits from a book written 35
years
ago by an astrologist predictionist. Read your sign, then repost
this in
a new bulletin with your zodiac sign and label, or you'll get bad
luck
for the number of years stated in your sign description. Don't
try
ignoring it, and the first thing you'll notice is having a
horrible day
starting tomorrow morning and it only gets worse from there. Send
to 7
friends.

TAURUS: The Tramp
Aggressive; Freak in bed. Rare to find! Loves being in long
relationships. Likes to give a good fight for what they want.
Extremely
outgoing. Sexy as ........ Loves to help people in times of need.
Outstanding kisser. Very funny. Awesome personality. Stubborn.
Sexual as
......... Most caring person you will ever meet! One of a kind.
Not one
to #### with. Are the most sexiest people on earth! 15 years of
bad luck
if you do not repost.

VIRGO: The Virgin
Dominant in relationships. Sexy. Someone loves them right now.
Freak in
bed. Always wants the last word. Caring. Smart. Intellectual.
Attractive.
Loud. Loyal. Easy to talk to. Hard to forget Love at first sight.
Everything you ever wanted. Easy to please. The one and only.
Ultimate
sexiness. 7 years of bad luck if you do not repost.

SCORPIO: Sex Addict
Can be mean. EXTREMELY sexy. Intelligent. Energetic. Predict
future. Most
erotic. (Freak in bed.) (GREAT kisser.) Always get what they
want. Sexy.
Attractive. Easy going. Loves being in long relationships.
Talkative. The
sexiest ever....Romantic. Caring. 4 years of bad luck if you do
not
repost.

LIBRA: The Lover
Very pretty. Very romantic. Nice to everyone they meet. Their
Love is one
of a kind. Silly, fun and sweet. Have own unique sexiness. Most
caring
person you will ever meet! Amazing in bed..!!! Did I say Amazing
in Bed?
Not the kind of person you wanna ### with... You might end up
crying...
The Most irresistible. 9 years of bad luck if you do not repost.

ARIES: The Liar
Outgoing. Lovable. Spontanious. Not one to #### with. Erotic.
Funny. Take
you on trips to the moon in bed. Excellent kisser EXTREMELY sexy.
Loves
being in long relationships. Addictive. Loud. Best in bed. 16
years of
bad luck if you do not repost.

AQUARIUS: Does it in the water
Trustworthy. Sexy. Great kisser. One of a kind. Loves being in
long-term
relationships. Extremely energetic. Unpredictable. Will exceed
your
expectations. Not a Fighter, But will Knock your lights out.
Amazing in
bed, THE BEST LOVERS BETTER THAN EVERYONE! 2 years of bad luck if
you do
not repost.

GEMINI: Does Twosomes
Nice. Love is one of a kind. Great listeners Very Good in bed.
Lover not
a fighter, but will still knock you the #### out. Trustworthy.
Always
happy. Loud. Talkative. Outgoing VERY FORGIVING. Loves to make
out. Has a
beautiful smile. Generous. Strong. ULTRA SEXY. THE MOST
IRRESISTABLE. 9
years of Bad luck if you do not repost.

LEO: The Lion in bed
Great talker. Sexy and passionate. Laid back. Knows how to have
fun. Is
really good at it. Great kisser. Unpredictable. Outgoing. Down to
earth.
Addictive. Attractive. Loud. Loves being in long relationships.
Talkative. Not one to mess with. Rare to find. Good when found. 7
years
of bad luck if you do not repost.

CANCER: The Cutie
MOST AMAZING KISSER. Very high ### appeal. Great in bed!!! Love
is one of
a kind. Very romantic. Most caring person you will ever meet!
Entirely
creative. Extremely random and proud of it. Freak in bed.
Spontaneous.
Great telling stories. Not a Fighter, But will knock your lights
out if
it comes down to it. Someone you should hold on to. 12 years of
bad luck
if you do not repost.

PISCES: The Piece of ass
Caring and kind. Smart. Center of attention. Too Sexy, DAMN IT.
Very high
### appeal. Has the last word. The best to find, hardest to keep.
Fun to
be around. Freak in the sheets. Extremely weird but in a good
way. Super
good in bed. Good Sense of Humor!!! Thoughtful. A partner for
life.
Always gets what he or she wants. Loves to joke. Very popular.
Silly, fun
and sweet. 5 years of bad luck if you do not repost.

CAPRICORN: The Passionate Lover
Love to bust. Nice. Sassy. Intelligent. Sexy. Predict future.
Irresistible, awesome kisser. Loves being in long relationships.
Great
talker. Always gets what he or she wants. BY FAR the BEST in BED.
Very
sexy. Coolest. Loves to own Gemini's in sports. Extremely fun.
Loves to
joke. Loves to be your first. So you'll neverforget. Smart. 24
years of
bad luck if you do not repost.

SAGITTARIUS:. The Sexy one
Spontaneous. Horny. Freak in Bed. High appeal. Rare to find.
Great when
found. Loves being in long relationships. The one. So much love
to give.
Not one to mess with. Very pretty. Very romantic. Nice to
everyone they
meet. Their Love is one of a kind. Silly, fun and sweet. Have own
unique
sexiness. Most caring person you will ever meet! Amazing in
Bed..!!! Did
I say Amazing in Bed? Not the kind of person you wanna with you
might end
up crying. 4 years of bad luck if you do not repost.

[Alansmurf]

Oh yeah I'm a Gemini!!!

[Pacificshore]

I'm a Cancer :D

[Terao]

Gemini, also if there anyone wants to know why gf just broke up with me while i was training by text and said some rather nasty things.

[tom pain]

Libra all the way!

[Victoria]

Scorpio here ;) :yeleyes:

[Moony]

Pisces all the way!

[Victoria]

Is it me or do most of those basically read the same thing? :confused:

[tom pain]

Is it me or do most of those basically read the same thing? :confused:

Dont dis-credit them though!

For example, Libra:

Very pretty. Very romantic. Nice to everyone they meet. Their love is one of a kind. Silly, fun and sweet. Have own unique sexiness. Most caring person you will ever meet! Amazing in bed..!!! Did I say Amazing in bed?


It's like they have known me all my life!

[Terao]

and wrote the exact opposit. :D

[Alansmurf]

Is it me or do most of those basically read the same thing? :confused:


Dont be such a pessimist !!!

Go with the flow ...


Loves to make out. Has a beautiful smile. Generous. Strong.


ULTRA SEXY.
THE MOST
IRRESISTABLE. 9


works for me !!!

[Victoria]

:rolleyes:


:D


Hey I'm not complaining about mine either ;)

[CKinnerley]

Is it me or do most of those basically read the same thing? :confused:They basically read the same thing. i.e. pretty much all highly complimentary, the reason being you read that sort of stuff and of course you're going to want to agree with it, so you say "ah yes, that's completely true".

Are we allowed to say bollocks?

Edit - I have to say, considering you joined 5 months after me, your post count is disturbing. :confused:

[Moony]

Libra all the way!

LIBRA: The Lover. Says who?

Very pretty. Looks are a bit girly and lacks manly ruggedness...

Very romantic. Just trying to win you over for a quickie!Nice to everyone they meet.

Their love is one of a kind. More like a one minute wonder...Silly, fun and sweet.

Have own unique sexiness. Pity they have to hide their faces with boxes (paper bags arn't stout enough!).

Most caring person you will ever meet! It's a pity they only care about themselves...

Amazing in bed..!!! When it comes to snoring...

Did I say Amazing in Bed? Yes, now break out those ear plugs already!!

Not the kind of person you wanna ### with... They break down to quickly which makes them no fun at all...

You might end up crying... Because your laughing so hard at them...

The Most irresistible. Only to each other.

[inokichi]

AQUARIUS: Does it in the water. Trustworthy. Sexy. Great kisser. One of a kind. Loves being in long-term relationships. Extremely energetic. Unpredictable. Will exceed your expectations. Not a Fighter, But will Knock your lights out. Amazing in bed, THE BEST LOVERS BETTER THAN EVERYONE! 2 years of bad luck if you do not repost.


Well...w00t. :cool:

[tom pain]

Pisces all the way!

PISCES: The Piece of ass Got the 'ass' bit right!

Caring and kind. Until you meet them
Smart.ass
Center of attention. "Hahah look at that weirdo!"
Too Sexy, DAMN IT.
Very high ### appeal. Those hashes do not stand for 'sex' I can guarantee it
Has the last word. Well no-one wants to talk to them anymore!
The best to find, hardest to keep. Yep - so easy to get rid of
Fun to be around. Laughing at them, not with them
Freak in the sheets. Freak in general
Extremely weird but in a good way. Ignore everything from 'but' onwards
Super good in bed. Useless everywhere else though
A partner for life. Clingers
Always gets what he or she wants. And dominating too
Loves to joke. Fails to be funny though
Very popular. Well has got lots of (imaginery) friends

[Saz]

Anybody notice that MAP dating is just like a real dating site? 90% men :D

And at least one 350lb chick :D

For the record (and any existing doubters expecting me or Ian to turn up in your local resturant wearing a carnation) this was our April Fools joke.

[Moony]

PISCES: The Piece of ass Got the 'ass' bit right!

Caring and kind. Until you meet them
Smart.ass
Center of attention. "Hahah look at that weirdo!"
Too Sexy, DAMN IT.
Very high ### appeal. Those hashes do not stand for 'sex' I can guarantee it
Has the last word. Well no-one wants to talk to them anymore!
The best to find, hardest to keep. Yep - so easy to get rid of
Fun to be around. Laughing at them, not with them
Freak in the sheets. Freak in general
Extremely weird but in a good way. Ignore everything from 'but' onwards
Super good in bed. Useless everywhere else though
A partner for life. Clingers
Always gets what he or she wants. And dominating too
Loves to joke. Fails to be funny though
Very popular. Well has got lots of (imaginery) friends

It's nice to see the violation is having good results....
[cackle]

[Rhea]

PISCES: The Piece of ass Got the 'ass' bit right!

Caring and kind. Until you meet them
Smart.ass
Center of attention. "Hahah look at that weirdo!"
Too Sexy, DAMN IT.
Very high ### appeal. Those hashes do not stand for 'sex' I can guarantee it
Has the last word. Well no-one wants to talk to them anymore!
The best to find, hardest to keep. Yep - so easy to get rid of
Fun to be around. Laughing at them, not with them
Freak in the sheets. Freak in general
Extremely weird but in a good way. Ignore everything from 'but' onwards
Super good in bed. Useless everywhere else though
A partner for life. Clingers
Always gets what he or she wants. And dominating too
Loves to joke. Fails to be funny though
Very popular. Well has got lots of (imaginery) friends


I'm a Picses, and all the original comments sum me up perfectly. ;)

[Sam]

GEMINI: Does Twosomes
Nice. Love is one of a kind. Great listeners Very Good in bed.
Lover not
a fighter, but will still knock you the #### out. Trustworthy.
Always
happy. Loud. Talkative. Outgoing VERY FORGIVING. Loves to make
out. Has a
beautiful smile. Generous. Strong. ULTRA SEXY. THE MOST
IRRESISTABLE. 9
years of Bad luck if you do not repost.

So true.

[Davey Bones]

CAPRICORN: The Passionate Lover
Love to bust. Nice. Sassy. Intelligent. Sexy. Predict future.
Irresistible, awesome kisser. Loves being in long relationships.
Great talker. Always gets what he or she wants. BY FAR the BEST in BED.
Very sexy. Coolest. Loves to own Gemini's in sports. Extremely fun.
Loves to joke. Loves to be your first. So you'll neverforget. Smart. 24
years of bad luck if you do not repost.

he he he :D

[aikiwolfie]

And at least one 350lb chick :D

For the record (and any existing doubters expecting me or Ian to turn up in your local resturant wearing a carnation) this was our April Fools joke.
:cry: and I wanted to date the fat chick :cry: Guess i should have reposted that cancer horror scope thingy :(

But on a more positive note at least I won't end up paralysed from having my pelvis crushed by a 350lb roll of lard. :eek:

[Su lin]

Oi!

There is nothing wrong with being 350lbs. Im beautiful on the inside. :cry:

[Victoria]

But on a more positive note at least I won't end up paralysed from having my pelvis crushed by a 350lb roll of lard. :eek:
Then bend her over or get on top :D

:eek:

[Su lin]

LEO: The Lion in bed
Great talker. Sexy and passionate. Laid back. Knows how to have
fun. Is
really good at it. Great kisser. Unpredictable. Outgoing. Down to
earth.
Addictive. Attractive. Loud. Loves being in long relationships.
Talkative. Not one to mess with. Rare to find. Good when found. 7
years


Oooooh yeah! I may be hefty but I'm "really good at IT" :p :love:

[aikiwolfie]

Then bend her over or get on top :D
I wasn't sure if fat people could bend over :o

Su if you're so great at IT why do you work in a museum with dusty old bones and paintings and stuff :confused: :p

:D and yes you are beautiful on the inside :D

[Hiroji]

ARIES: The Liar
Outgoing. Lovable. Spontanious. Not one to #### with. Erotic.
Funny. Take
you on trips to the moon in bed. Excellent kisser EXTREMELY sexy.
Loves
being in long relationships. Addictive. Loud. Best in bed.

People have taken that quite literally lately... :cry:

[g-bells]

ARIES: The Liar
Outgoing. Lovable. Spontanious. Not one to #### with. Erotic.
Funny. Take
you on trips to the moon in bed. Excellent kisser EXTREMELY sexy.
Loves
being in long relationships. Addictive. Loud. Best in bed.

People have taken that quite literally lately... :cry:

H- your a cream puff, who you trying to kid? :p

[Hiroji]

H- your a cream puff, who you trying to kid? :p


yeh i know, but i was talking about girls not wanting to Fword with me :o

but that dosent matter, because its me and thee all the way :)

[Su lin]

I wasn't sure if fat people could bend over :o

Su if you're so great at IT why do you work in a museum with dusty old bones and paintings and stuff :confused: :p

:D and yes you are beautiful on the inside :D

Hahaha! Not good at I.T but good at IT! Get it? ;)

Talking of work,I am still there! GRRRRR! :woo:

[aikiwolfie]

Talking of work ... I finish at 3:15pm every day Su :p

[Su lin]

:cry: :cry:
Stupid exhibition installation! :(

[Cait]

i have to say, this is one of the best april fools jokes i've ever seen :D much fun

and hey, i matched both chimp and g!
....talk about a scary combination :p

[wrydolphin]

Run, Cait!

You got both of MAP' two worst stalkers! They'll be outside your window in the bushes sharing a mega bucket o' the Colonel's finest. Just you wait! :p

[Su lin]

I became less fussy and now I have 5 matches :D

[NaughtyKnight]

Talking of work ... I finish at 3:15pm every day Su :p

I did that once. Though usually meant me starting at 3 am :p.