Got any put downs!

[Geordie Boy]

Last time i saw legs like that it had breadcumbs on it.

She's got a face like a saint.......a st bernard!

Who picks your clothes......stevie wonder?

[YODA]

You do sure have a lot of Well-wishers. They'd all like to throw you down one...

Somebody said to me that you ain't fit to sleep with the pigs. Well, I stuck up for the pigs.

I never forget a face, but in your case I'll make an exception

I hear you're connected to the Police Department - by a pair of handcuffs...

Shouldn't you have a license for being that ugly?

I heard when you were a child your Mother wanted to hire someone to take care of you, but the Mafia wanted too much.

Why don't you just open your mind and shut your mouth, both are empty anyway.

I hear you were born on April 2; a day too late!

You must be an experiment in Artificial Stupidity.

Everybody has a photographic memory. You simply don't have the film.

You're about as good lookin as a cross between the Elephant Man and a Pitbull Terrier..

You! Off my planet!

See no evil, hear no evil, date no evil.

Just out of curiosity, are your parents siblings?

Whilst every girl has the right to be ugly, you seem to have abused that privelige!

You're the kind of man that is a blueprint for building an idiot.

I'd like to leave you with one thought...unfortunately I ain't sure you have anywhere to put it!

Yeah, yeah, keep talking, someday you might say something intelligent.

Sure, I'd love to help you out...now, which way did you come in?

Excuse me, is that your nose, or are you eating a Banana?

When you were born, did they let your Mother out of her cell?

You're so bent you make roundabouts look straight!

I've seen better hands on a leper!

This is an excellent time for you to become a missing person.

You've got more chins than a Chinese phone book!

I've come across rotting bodies that are less offensive than you are.

You're a habit I'd like to kick -- with both feet.

So now we know why some mammals eat their children...

[thiaboxr2]

Your so ugly, you can put your face in dough and make monster cookies.

You were so ugly as a child that even your imaginary friend would not play with you.

You were so ugly when you were born that the doctor threw you against the wall and told your parents that if it doesn't come back, its a bat.

you were so ugly as a child that you had tinted windows on your incubator.

Your teeth are so yellow, I can't believe it's not butter!

Your mother is so stupid, she asked me what comes after "x" in the alphabit. I said "y". She said because I want to know.

Your mother is so fat, she went on a 14 day diet and the only thing she lost was 2 weeks.

Your mother is so fat that when she fell down, she tried to get up and rocked herself to sleep.:D

[Blackbeltmike00]

Your mother is like a door knobb, everyone gets a turn!

You are so poor that when I walk through your front door I am in your backyard.

[totality]

those hardly fit in any real situations though...here's my take on making others aware of their stupidity :D
btw, these are usually aimed at friends.
*name*...*name*...arms length away. (this is where you shove them away from you)

hey, would you mind stepping into my office for a moment? ok, alright? you're fired. get out of my office.
----
of course, i'm generally more direct...and violent :D

[Cain]

Jon says to Richard - you look like a fat ugly buffalo

Richard replies to Jon - You look like you ATE the fat ugly buffalo :D

Mathematician to astronomer - I am going to reduce you to the simpliest expression

Astronomer retorts - And I am going to make you see stars!!!!!

|Cain|

[SoKKlab]

Your head is so far up your own arse
-You could clean your teeth with your own intestines..

'You're fat mate'
'And you're ugly mate-but I can always lose weight'

Random insult for the day:
'Ya sh1tebox!'

[SK12879]

Your momma is so ugly, her nickname is DAMN!!!!
Your momma is so ugly, she has to pull the covers over her head so sleep can sneak up on her.

[Kinjiro Tsukasa]

Is that your own face, or are you breaking it in for a witch?

Your village called, their idiot is missing.

Originally posted by YODA
Excuse me, is that your nose, or are you eating a Banana?

LOL, YODA, that one is older than you and me put together!

[KickChick]

"I'm blonde. What's your excuse?" (my fav ;) )

"Ordinarily people live and learn, but you, you just live."

"Talk is cheap. but that's OK ... so are you."

"You are living proof that 'manure' can sprout legs and walk."

"Whom am I calling 'stupid'? Good question. I don't know. What is your name?"

"Some drink from the fountain of knowledge, but it looks like this guy just gargled."

"I know you are nobody's fool, but maybe someone will adopt you one day"

[KungFuGrrrl]

put down:
Pull your head outta your a*** or put a window in your belly so you can see what the hell is going on

[xplasma]

anything from

www.yourmom.com

[timmeh!]

These are Geordie ones....

"yeev got a fayce like a blind cobbler's thumb..."

"yeev got a fayce like a pit bull lickin pi** off a nettle" - personal favourite! :D

[semphoon]

You're so ugly that when you were born the doctor tried to push you back in.

[fluffydoc]

Your ma's got 2 c***s, and you're one of them.

[Andy Murray]

Fluffers, I'd ban you for that if I could stop laughing! :p

[fluffydoc]

Clearly you are a man of taste and discretion.

Cheers doll!

[Cougar_v203]

lmao! fluff that was highlarious :D

[Adam]

Most scathing putdown I ever heard was from some Robert Deniro film where he was being an ass towards a drag queen and the queen responded: "Honey, I'm more man than you'll ever be and more woman than you'll ever get"

[Cougar_v203]

hubby:honey you up in 15 mins!
wife: ok
hubby: woa! Shave that beard off your so ugly!!

[Tsing Tao]

Your mamma's so fat that when i swirved to miss her i ran outta gas.

[Cougar_v203]

lol