Martial Arts are Rubbish!

[Andy Murray]

What people mean when they say;

Tae Kwon Do is Rubbish!
(I can't kick to save myself!)

Kung Fu is Rubbish!
(I have the grace of a rutting Rhinocerous!)

Karate is Rubbish!
(I have no patience, or self discipline!)

Muay Thai is Rubbish!
(Those guys scare me!)

Choi Kwan Do is Rubbish!
(I'm jealous of a successful organisation!)

Tai Chi is Rubbish!
(I can't remember forms!)

Boxing is Rubbish!
(I have a glass jaw!)

FMA is Rubbish!
(I have two left feet, and the coordination of a decapitated chicken!)

Capoeira is Rubbish!
(I have no sense of rhythm!)

BJJ is Rubbish!
(I don't even know what it is, so it must be Rubbish!)

Aikido is Rubbish!
(I fall like a tree!)

Judo is Rubbish!
(I'm an idiot!)

Martial Arts are all Rubbish!
(I'm a geek!)

Ninjitsu is Rubbish!
(Can't find the b*ggers!)

Any more?

:D

[pgm316]

Eskrima is Rubbish
(I'm scared of getting splinters)

Wrestling is Rubbish
(I look fat in Lycra)

[khafra]

Bagua is Rubbish!
(walking in circles makes me dizzy)

6 month Black Belts are rubbish!
(Oh, er, yes... They are rubbish. heh)

[Knight_Errant]

MMA is rubbish! (I am a ****ing fairy)
Jujitsu is rubbish! (When i was born, they didn't know which end was the arse and which was the face, so my parents put a label on my mouth so they'd know which end to feed)

[Saz]

Tae Bo is Rubbish (I can't do Aerobics and look like a ponce in Lycra)

Kyokushinikai is Rubbish (I can't do Seiken Push ups or get shouted at for no reason)

Taijutsu is Rubbish (After having it explained loads of times, I still don't know what it is)

:D Good thread Andy

[kobudo_tob]

West Yorkshire Kobudo Academy is rubbish!!
(I'm scared that the Instructor, Tobias, will steal my girlfriend since hes so handsome. My goodness I'm so jealous. But hes so dreamy...AHHH)

[Adam]

Sumo is rubbish (I would get splatted under one of those fat freaks)

TMA's rubbish (They never win the UFC so they MUST all be rubbish)

Testa's rubbish! (I have a soft head)

MMA's rubbish (They're all steroid using thugs loving to beat up little old ladies)

BJJ is rubbish (what, are they gay or something, lying on the floor like that?)

Breaking's rubbish (I punch like a sissy and have soft hands)

Ashihara's rubbish (Kyokushin is THE ULTIMATE STYLE! Why need to evolve it?)

All MA's but Wing Chun are rubbish (no discussion, wing chun is the greatest realistic fighting style in the world and 6 months training will allow you to beat up any blackbelt in the world!)

Adam's rubbish (say that to my scalp, sucker!)

[Cain]

Jeet Kune Do is rubbish!
(Who's Bruce Lee??)

:D

|Cain|

[morphus]

good post

[Fergie Boy]

Now I say what I mean usually, but to fit in with this thread what I should be saying is;

Tae Kwon Do is Rubbish!
Kung Fu is Rubbish!
Muay Thai is Rubbish!
FMA is Rubbish!
Capoeira is Rubbish!
Aikido is Rubbish!
Martial Arts are all Rubbish!


My instructors might not like teaching me so much if I said that though.

JKD is rubbish (but you can't do that and you aren't allowed to do that)

[Bushi]

Shinergy is rubbish!
(If it's not ancient - they call themselves "time-oriented" - it can't be good)

Krav Maga is rubbish!
(When I see an opponent, I'm paralyzed!)

Kendo is rubbish!
(I have reflexes like a stone)

[doctrdev]

"Chi is rubbish!" - I am a close-minded fool, who is despirately trying to look intelligent.

"Martial arts are rubbish!" - famous last words! =)

"All other martial arts but MY style, are rubbish!" - famous last words!

"Your teacher is rubbish!" - doesn't know any other teachers, and so has no basis for comparison.

"Kung-fu is rubbish" - I can only think in straight lines.

"Karate is rubbish" - People say I have trouble being straightforward with my life...

[Em-em]

Judo IR -- I don't know how to bend my neck

Tournament Karate IR -- I'm not good at withdrawing my attacks

FMA IR -- I'm a discrimating fool

Capoeira IR -- I don't want my hands to get dirty

Kendo IR -- I don't want to train with bamboo sticks, I want a real sword!

MA is rubbish -- Im an overprotective and concerned parent/partner

[saikyou]

Saijitsu is Rubbish
(I will look like a ninja turtle)

kendo is rubbish
(i look like a football player)

TKD is rubbish
(can't split)

Judo is rubbish
(im afraid to fall)

Capoeira is rubbish
(I want MA and not dancing)

[electrobes]

MA is complete rubbish
(I'm lazy and know it)

[pgm316]

Originally posted by Cain
Jeet Kune Do is rubbish!
(Who's Bruce Lee??)

:D

|Cain|

Isn't that him that copied all his stuff from Bruce Li?

:D

[Cain]

You mean copied from the one who copied from Bruce Lei? :D

|Cain|

[pgm316]

Oh yeah, my history is so bad! ;)

[WhiteWizard]

forgot too add

CKD is rubbish
(non injury my arse :D)

[Cougar_v203]

Militart Martial Arts is rubbish
(meh oh well i rather get my arse shot off)

[zun]

Yoga is rubbish.
(I can't touch my toes).
(Too many cute women. I'm gay)

Muay Thai is rubbish.
(The girl fighters beat me up)

Boxing is rubbish
(I love my face the way it is. Thanks)

MA is rubbish
(I like watching tv way too much)

Karate is rubbish
(The colours are so last year darling)

Sex is rubbish
(I've misplaced the viagra)
(My partner is ugly and we leave the light on)

Sumo is rubbish
(The diapers are too tight)

[zun]

Originally posted by Cain
You mean copied from the one who copied from Bruce Lei? :D



The original - Lee Bruce.

[shotokanwarrior]

Ninjutsu is rubbish = I value my life.
shotokanwarrior

[Jack]

Stavit is rubbish (I don't dare risk my life facing one of their practitioners)

Jack

[fluffydoc]

Isn't it funny how if you read a word enough times it stops meaning anything? I now think rubbish is a type of broccoli.

[Andy Murray]

Just noticed this old thread.

I meant to type 'Rhubarb' not Rubbish, please forgive me everyone.

I didn't mean to start anything honest. :D




P.S. Rhubarb tastes nothing like Broccoli!

[zun]

I've been forcefed Broccoli so many times, it's like rubbish - or Rhubarb.

[Cougar_v203]

Everything is rubbish
(my life sucks)

[booksie_girl]

MAP sucks!

I got caught trolling, and the Mods got a bit nasty

[#1 Stutta]

TKD is rubbish
(I have no balance)

Ninjutsu is rubbish
(I like living, thank you)

Sex is rubbish
(Girls don't like me b/c I'm small)

Boxing is rubbish
(My nose is messed up enough)

Sumo is rubbish
(I don't use diapers, I use toilets)

MA is rubbish
(I'm a weak little pansy w/ no backbone)

Football is rubbish
(I'm not a man)

Weight lifting is rubbish
(My max for everything is 10 lbs)

MAP is rubbish
(I'm a big, fat, stupid, ugly troll)

[Shyguy]

"I know kung fu..." is rubbish
(I ain't Keanu Reeves, at least I think I'm not).

[bcullen]

Martial arts are rubbish??

Hey I like that!
Over 2000 years of empirical studies relating to warfare from philosophy, personal defense, strategy, medicine et al, by some of the greatest leaders of every country in the world are rubbish because Joe (I can't get my butt off the barstool) Schmoe says so.
Now that's funny.

[Gryphon Hall]

Teras Kasi is rubbish
(I tried floating a starship but it didn't work)

[Getalifebud]

None of that **** works in the street- I hope I never face any conflict alone

[kallus]

:) These are good, I er mean...
posting is rubbish (I'm afraid people will laugh at me) :cry:





the more I look around this site the better it gets :p

[baubin2]

Kuk Sool Won is rubbish!
(I don't get promoted every two months!)

[ZenPixelTKD]

What people say..
What they really mean..

Japanese martial arts are the best.
(I practice a Japanese martial art.)

This art is thousands of years old.
(This style is decades old.)

The martial arts are about building better people.
(The martial arts are about sweats, bruises and money.)

Chinese martial arts are the best.
(I practice a Chinese martial art.)

High kicks are stupid.
(I can't do high kicks.)

Sparring is extremely important.
(I am good at fighting and I like it and I can't do much of anything else.)

The martial arts are about building better people.
(The martial arts are about beating people up if they lay a finger on you.)

Korean martial arts are the best.
(I practice a Korean martial art.)

Breaking techniques are very important.
(We do a lot of breaking techniques.)

I don't believe in grades
(Nobody ever gave me a high grade.) or (I failed my last grading)

The martial arts are about building better evolved characters.
(Like me.)

Filipino martial arts are the best.
(I practice a Filipino martial art.)

Sophisticated arts like Tai Chi and aikido are far superior.
(Sparring frightens me.)

He's a good martial arts teacher.
(He's in my organization.)

He's a lousy martial arts teacher.
(He used to be in my organization, but he broke a way, and I don't get any money out of him anymore.)

My style is the best.
(I don't know anything about any other styles.)

Grades are not important.
(There's a grading coming and it's important.)

Breaking techniques are useless.
(I can't do breaking techniques.)

I am an innovative, free thinking, modern Western martial arts teacher, doing my own non-classical thing.
(I am more interested in teaching than learning; and the Orientals ignore me because they know how ignorant I am.)

Martial arts politics are the necessary result of official recognition by respectable associations to protect the public.
(I belong to a large, well established organization.)

I hate martial arts politics.
(None of the large, well established organizations recognize me or have the slightest interest in my existence.)

In this system, we make the art fit the person.
(In this system, we make the person fit the art.)

Competitions are a waste of time.
(I never won any competitions.)

Forms or kata are the highest expression of inner essence of the martial arts.
(I've read that somewhere -- and I've had enough of tournaments.)

Forms or kata are useless.
(Bruce Lee said forms are useless and this relieves me of a lot of effort, so go argue with him.)

One style is not better than another -- it's the individual that counts.
(Don't go to another school -- it's the style that we teach here that counts.)

The techniques aren't important.
(The techniques are important.)

Bruce Lee didn't know what he's talking about.
(I don't know what Bruce Lee was talking about.)

Size and strength are not important.
(Size and strength are important, especially if you're fighting someone who's bigger and stronger than you are.)

Science and leverage will always win out brute force.
(Unless when he's bigger and stronger than you are.)

The purpose of the martial arts is spiritual development and liberation from the ego.
(I am so humble and wise; it's terrific.)

[Rhea]

with the MMA is rubbish thread in GD, thought this deserved a re airing as it made me laugh

[Beltless]

MMA is rubbish.
(I do Jeet kune do)

Jeet kune do is rubbish.
(I do MMA)

:D

[pulp fiction]

This thread is rubbish
(I check it everyday and it is cool)

Sex is rubbish
(I don't have a partner)

TKD is rubbish
(I can't do high kicks and I envy Olympic athletes)

Muay Thai is rubbish
(I want to fight like them but I don't have the balls to do it.)

[Dan Bian]

Leonna Lewis is rubbish - (I keep hearing her song everywhere, and its really getting on my nerves!)

[Knight_Errant]

Oh wow, I remember this thread :)

[gorinnosho]

Tournement karate is rubbish
(i've never been in one and don't want to, in case i get beaten.)

[Hiroji]

All martial arts were rubbish.

(Until i started doing them and made them look good.) :cool:

BJJ is the best ive found my favourite art forever!

(Im gay?) :confused: