men and crying

[killbill]

okay, here i go embarrasing myself :cry: :cry: :cry:
in a lot of cultures, it is taboo for men to cry. Most men in America rarely cry and deny that they ever do. What are your thoughts on this social standard? and i know it might be embarresing, but post some non relationship non pain things that have made you cry
me:Cowboy Bebop (final episode), The Pasion of the Christ, His Dark Materials trilogy (end of the final book) and also some song i can't remember the title of. :cry:

[JohnnyX]

okay, here i go embarrasing myself :cry: :cry: :cry:
in a lot of cultures, it is taboo for men to cry. Most men in America rarely cry and deny that they ever do. What are your thoughts on this social standard? and i know it might be embarresing, but post some non relationship non pain things that have made you cry
me:Cowboy Bebop (final episode), The Pasion of the Christ, His Dark Materials trilogy (end of the final book) and also some song i can't remember the title of. :cry:

I've not cried for years. Can't remember what it was that did make me cry last.

Going through a bit of a bad patch at the moment so feel like crying every day. :cry:

Cheers.

[killbill]

how come on my topics you are almost always first to post? are you following me? :cry:

[neryo_tkd]

I am not a man, but I think that it depends a lot on the person (either man or woman). Although women are said to be the gentler sex, I am of the opinion that the situation is also important.

Some people start crying easily and it takes just a little for them to start crying whereas some people are not like it but it doesn't mean that they don't have emotions.

Not every situation is the same. I guess when someone loses their partner, parent, child I guess both a man and a woman would cry and there is nothing to be embarassed about. In those situations it might be even better to cry and let it all out instead of accumulating it all inside.

As I have already said I am not a man, but this was my hubble contribution to the thread.

[mattsylvester]

I cry a lot and I'm a man. I just get touched by things easily. It doesn't help that I lost a couple members of my family and had a baby last year and got signed off work due to stress this year :)

[Picksey]

Did you know that men's and women's brains deal with emotions differently? Apparently, brain scans have shown that the areas active in a woman's brain when she's 'having and emotion' are smaller and scattered throughout the brain, while in a man's brain the active areas are larger but fewer. This is supposed to be why anything can trigger tears in a woman, because everything she does is linked (in the brain) and she can't 'switch off' her emotions; whereas men can 'compartmentalise' - get on with things and deal with the emotion later, usually in private.

Also, women have the advantage that they can have a good cry and feel better for it, even if nothing has been resolved. I don't think men can fool themselves quite so easily, which is probably why they don't cry as often - they prefer to actually do something to solve the problem. But it's no use denying that you cry, guys - I've seen most of my male friends cry at one time or another, and not just due to relationship type things.

I wonder why it's usually considered OK for a woman to cry, but that a man should be ashamed if he cries? It's not a sign of weakness - you're just venting some emotion before you go off and deal with it.

[JohnnyX]

how come on my topics you are almost always first to post? are you following me? :cry:

Nope. You'll only kick my ass. :D :eek: :D

[Tika]

Did you know that men's and women's brains deal with emotions differently? Apparently, brain scans have shown that the areas active in a woman's brain when she's 'having and emotion' are smaller and scattered throughout the brain, while in a man's brain the active areas are larger but fewer. This is supposed to be why anything can trigger tears in a woman, because everything she does is linked (in the brain) and she can't 'switch off' her emotions; whereas men can 'compartmentalise' - get on with things and deal with the emotion later, usually in private.



Wow...good info. It always made me really really mad that anything could cause me to cry. Especially when im in a particular emotional mood. Now at least I have some scientific reasons . :D

[Mrs Owt]

okay, here i go embarrasing myself :cry: :cry: :cry:
in a lot of cultures, it is taboo for men to cry. Most men in America rarely cry and deny that they ever do. What are your thoughts on this social standard? and i know it might be embarresing, but post some non relationship non pain things that have made you cry
me:Cowboy Bebop (final episode), The Pasion of the Christ, His Dark Materials trilogy (end of the final book) and also some song i can't remember the title of. :cry:

Again, not a man replying, but I have had many opportunities to observe men in really different circumstances. When they cry is really interesting. The usual ones, for people like my dad or father-in-law, are the typical soft touch events. Babies being born, anniversary speeches, or newborn baby grandchildren being put in their arms. For the more middle-aged guys they cry at the above as well (especially if they are fathers) but they also tend to cry when faced with loss and they feel out of control. With younger men I have noticed tears usually come out of frustration and a feeling of impotence. If they are not getting there way or feel they aren't being heard.

Don't get me wrong, Canadian guys aren't out there blubbering all the time, but I don't think crying is as verboten as it used to be. I think it would be interesting if we all knew just how often MAP men cried! Come on guys - share your softer side!

[killbill]

Nope. You'll only kick my ass. :D :eek: :D

how are you gonna kick MY ass with an attitude like that? Fights are won and lost before the first blow is struck. you should be all like "your gonna kick my ass? HAHAHAHA that's some funny ****, if you come over to my house, i'll shove my fist so far down your throat that i'll be able to tell what you had for dinner last night :woo: "

[Kwajman]

I may shed a tear over my children, but thats about it. I used to have dreams and goals, life tends to distract you from those. I used to shed tears at certain movies, animals, kids, things like that. I was a real softie, perhaps I still am inside. But when your down, if you expose yourself like that, to me at least, only bad things happen. So I have to be tough, not let emotions show. I think my sarcastic side has mostly taken over and thats how I show emotions.

[JohnnyX]

how come on my topics you are almost always first to post? are you following me? :cry:

Nope. You'll only kick my ass. :D :eek: :D

how are you gonna kick MY ass with an attitude like that? Fights are won and lost before the first blow is struck. you should be all like "your gonna kick my ass? HAHAHAHA that's some funny ****, if you come over to my house, i'll shove my fist so far down your throat that i'll be able to tell what you had for dinner last night :woo: "

killbill, read my post again.

I said "YOU'LL kick MY ass." not the other way around. :rolleyes:

I am now awaiting an apology for your outburst.

[Mrs Owt]

I may shed a tear over my children, but thats about it. I used to have dreams and goals, life tends to distract you from those. I used to shed tears at certain movies, animals, kids, things like that. I was a real softie, perhaps I still am inside. But when your down, if you expose yourself like that, to me at least, only bad things happen. So I have to be tough, not let emotions show. I think my sarcastic side has mostly taken over and thats how I show emotions.

I guess all of us get hardened by life's knocks. I know I am far less to be as open with people nowadays. Got knocked back by having my sincere intentions and emotions used against me. Don't give up Kwaj. There really are nice people out there, you just have to be REALLY careful in who you trust. :) (and I KNOW you are still a big ol' softie inside! ;) )

[acrawford]

Basically if something hurts me deeply I cry. I do not see it as weakness or lack of macho pride. I am myself and who cares what others will think.

[blackbelt_judoj]

I cried my eyes out when my instructor/close friend died over christmas. :cry: It was the first time i had cried in ages. There was no shame in doing it though. I think there is something wrong with people that think it is weak to cry. It's NOT...unless it's from a bee sting or something! :cool:

[Guerilla Fists]

I cry at sunset, I cry when my coffee is too strong, I cry when I have no tears left, I cry because I'm emo, I cry over cartoons, I cry when I see butterflies because they only have one day to live, I cry when I accidentally step on snails, I cry just for the sake of crying, but the thing that makes me cry the most is heart, or lack thereof, in fact, I'm so emo I don't have a heart.

[iain radford]

:) there is nothing wrong in a man crying.it doesn't mean that you are a sissy or anything.its good to cry.gets rid of pent up emotions.when i first watched brave heart that gave me a lump in my throat and i am a caveman looking bloke.the sound tyrack to that movie also gives me goose bumps! :D

[erikido]

I don't remember the last time I cried other than related to deaths, family or relationships.

[Kwajman]

Don't give up Kwaj. There really are nice people out there, you just have to be REALLY careful in who you trust. :) (and I KNOW you are still a big ol' softie inside! ;) )

Who ME??

http://home.tele2.fr/zest/smilies/siffle.gif

[jroe52]

i don't think it matters if men cry or not, as long as they give true emotions and are not fake. if they say they cry and don't, or they say they don't and they do, or they do and don't mean it, or they cry for lame reasons like they lost in a car race, then that is lame.

also, if people make fun of those that are serious and cry, are ignorant too. some guys think they get chicks by making fun of other guys, but then they realize they only are appealing to the other guys they think are cool.

just try to be real with your emotions, don't hide them in shame or you might not get your points across or not show someone how much you really feel. some places arn't good to cry or not needed and maybe not nescesarry, there are many ways to deal with emotions, crying is one of them.

[Taiso]

I don't have much emotion now and i'm only fourteen I've had deaths in the family, marriage break up in parents and stuff like that but i only realised that i was pretty much emotionless when one of my grandads died who i really liked but i didn't shed a tear for him i didn't even hold it back, which in itself makes you sad that you can't show emotion. Most people i know think i'm mean and cold hearted which i suppose is true i am cold hearted but not because i want don't to have emotion i just can't. but thats what life does. and then you die :Angel:

[killbill]

yeah, everyone i know thinks i'm pretty emotionless too.

[TOMcatXENO]

O man crying is ok I mean when you feel pain your body is going to make you cry and who cares it means somethings wrong and prolly is.But in most cases you will feel pain to where you hurt so bad you will be past crying

[Grifter]

I rarely cry. And Ive never cried over a movie or anything like that. Last Samurai almost got it out of me, but no quite. Only times I ever care are deaths. Oh and I cried when I first moved here because I missed my friend who is like a brother to me. As far as crying from pain...wow, I dont think I have cried because I was in pain since I was like 9 or 10.

[Furikuchan]

*blows nose* I hear ya, man. The Real Folk Blues (part 2) made me break down and cry, and I had to be removed from a theater when I was 7 for disturbing other children because I was laughing during Bambie. I don't normally get emotional at apropriate times. The last time I really had to cry was when I was round-kicked in the eyeball, and that was a purely physical reaction. I've been told that I was originally planned to be a male, but God got a little whimsical at my conception, because of my limited emotional range.
However, to prove that I am, in fact, a chick, I did cry at the end of Final Fantasy 9. Not X, I was giggling again at that ending, but 9, yes.

[TOMcatXENO]

Hey I cried when I was kicked in the eye ball that was pain right there

[chungmoomonkey]

i have this ability to not cry infront of proplr especialy when they are upset or crying like at my grandmother funeral the only time i wasn't crying was when i was conferting sum1 wls

[Ashiro]

Its something that used to bother me but now I no longer care. I've become a lot more open about my feelings. Whether its crying, hugging my mates being honest about myself. And to be honest. My life is a million times better for it. Holding things back is ridiculous and does more harm than good.

[TOMcatXENO]

Um so right Ashiro It shouldnt matter as long as your cool with yourself

[Nukite]

Most culture develop emotional intelligence therefore crying for men who develop these survival traits and go to war. Emotions are a big hindrance in times of high stress. Tradionally men have this trainning and women just "stay behind and cry".

[leo]

i never let neone see me cry, i dont like ppl seeing ne of my emotions, i dont know why but i just dont. i only cry for two reasons tho, the first is this girl i like, i have liked her for nearly 3 years but there is no hope between her and i have moved away now so i have not seen her for a year but have just started talkign to ger again over the internet, i really miss her and that makes me cry, the other is anger. i used to have a very bad temper and when i tried to control my anger i wud cry.

[JamieD]

I don't seem to be able to cry. Not that I'm an emotional hard man or anything, far from it.I won't bore you all with my life story but through all the events I have only cried when my grandfather died and that was at the funeral.
Although I don't cry I am never affraid to show my emotions, as long as the situation allows it. That is certain situations I don't feel I should let me emotions show when someone is speaking thier last words so they and other can see I'm strong and will "cope". at the risk of not sounding "PC", is this a "man thing" and is this the point of men not crying in public to hide thier emotions ? I think so.

[ziseez]

hey i feel ur pain in not crying but i dont wanna talk about ym life story niether but ive never cried. you all can believe me or not i dont really care.

[Nrv4evr]

men don't cry. they emit salty liquid from their eye sacs, whether it be from onions, getting kicked in the twins, or having sand thrown in their eyes. But men don't cry. end of story.

[Stealth]

i used to have a very bad temper and when i tried to control my anger i wud cry.
Me too. If there is nothing to break I feel like I am about to explode and start crying :cry:

I don't think that is crying because you are angry. I think it's because you feel helpless

[kchenault]

I cried at the movie The Passioin of the Christ, since He is my Savior. I cried at my brother and father's funerals. I cry when I realize how I have short changed my family when I have wronged them somehow. I cry over my shortcomings. Sometimes, you just have to let go or you will crack and then it gets messy with snot bubbles and stuff. And let's face it, snot bubbles just ain't where it's at. My two cents.

[wayofthedragon]

I admit....I am a man, and I do cry from time to time. Though it is really rare. It's hard to find a way to make me cry....but if you're able to hit the right emotions....which not much people have access to:D, you might catch a tear or two:cry:

[Mind Aflame]

it's probably because of horemones coupled with GCSE exams but all the chaps in my school are breaking down crying at the moment (myself included) And it's going to be very interesting to see how many deny it afterwards.